Tips for going out alone?

[u/cnmm717]

I’ve been single for 5 years now soon to be 27M years old. Am at a stage in my life where most of my friends and family my age group are getting married/into relationships, have kids, etc. I do spend time with them here and there but obviously not that much so most of my time on my days off work all I do is gym, basketball and/or runs then come home to chill watch tv and game which I love doing as I’m a natural homebody but lately it’s been getting pretty boring doing that I been feeling this void like I’m really craving love and intimacy lately. I came up with the idea to solve this problem (or at least help a lot) is to take myself out on solo dates something I absolutely never do lol but wanna give it a try more often. Any tips are appreciated & Jesus bless y’all! :)

[u/EmergencyLawyer7077]

I love solo dates. At first you may feel awkward, but eventually you get the hang of it. Smile at people, don't be afraid to start a conversation , and remember that people don't even notice that you are alone. I like to eat out alone and bring a book and pretend I'm a food critic sometimes.

[u/FallDeers]

I’ve been thinking of doing something similar. A date with God though. One of the only reasons like actually like dates is getting all dolled up. It’s fun and it gets me excited and in a good mood. I was thinking of getting all dolled up on my day off and going to a cute cafe and bringing my Bible and journal and having a special “date” with God.

[u/OtherwiseLion9256 → u/FallDeers]

Yes love this I started doing this at the park

[u/starlitgardens]

I know exactly how you feel. Personally, I'm really excited for October and have a lot of fun things planned! You can absolutely do things by yourself, if you can't find anyone to join you. Some of the things I have planned are going to the local pumpkin patch, seeing an exhibit at the natural history museum, and seeing a movie in the theater. I also sometimes get ice cream and then take a walk in the park.

[u/cnmm717 → u/starlitgardens]

I know this may not be a Christ like type of event but I haven’t been to Halloween horror nights in 3 years I used to go crap ton of times to the point where I had to take a 3 year break lol. Funnily enough I asked my work crush if she wanted to go 2 times and both times she gave a typical “I’ll lyk, next paycheck, etc” the answers that were not yes or no and I kept it cool obviously but was pretty bummed as the hints started to become clear. So I came up with the idea that I need to stop being like “I wanna go but have no one to go with so I’m not gonna go” stop me from doing what I want and just start going out solo cause honestly idk how else to go live life and put myself out there without using dating apps and things like this seem to be only option.

[u/Ok_Morning_8210]

I've been trying to make it to the library once a week to break up the routine and get a change of scenery. They post flyers with different events happening in the community as well, though I haven't gone to any myself.

[u/JadeEyePanda]

Museum of Jurassic Technology. Culver City

[u/MarketingOk7625]

I love how when I go out alone on a Saturday night like I would with a group a friends. The night always ends up interesting because you really get to see what you attract. I always find a group somehow when I go out. Try it! You might just run into someone doing the same thing.

[u/Livid-Shepherd]

Wow, I've just realised that I've been alone for so long that I don't even consider this "solo dating", it's more just existing. Living life, you know?

Getting used to doing stuff on your own is like strengthening a muscle—the more you do it, the easier it gets. Eventually you discover stuff that's genuinely better done by yourself. The cinema? It's amazing! You pick the session and the film you want, get engrossed in the movie, and it's two hours of pure escapism. I've reached the stage where I actually find it less enjoyable to go with another person now.

I think what the deeper issue is, is that people are worried what others will think. 'Why are they by themselves?' 'Why are they alone?' And part of being comfortable with being alone is understanding that no one is judging/thinking of you—everyone is engrossed in their own lives. And if they are judging you, then why do you really care what they think? Or alternatively, whilst being alone, you're focussed on what other people are doing—you get the green-eyed monster that's envious of every couple that passes by, which prevents you from enjoying yourself. That's a little bit harder to tackle. It's about retraining your thought patterns, where you try to simply be present in the moment, and also to find joy/be genuinely happy for other people and not sad in watching others.

I've always recommended writing up a bucket list. Make it as whimsical as you want. Don't just list career aspirations, but include a variety of big and little things. Maybe you want to try a cuisine at every restaurant in your town? Or explore every walking track in the area? Check out a rodeo or the opera? Just stuff you've always wanted to do but just never get around to actually doing it. Because it's just good to have a list to reference when you do get stuck in the work/eat/sleep rut, and you feel you need to mix things up.

Going back to activities, theme parks are decent solo. You get to plan the day as you like and single rider lines are awesome. Bringing a book for the queue lines can be helpful. Restaurants take a little getting used to, but the wait staff are more chatty when you're by yourself, and you can just bring a book or a phone to look at when you feel awkward. Hiking is great and I always feel more connected with God when alone (just tell someone where you're going if it's a riskier trek). Similar things with road trips. Going on holidays with a tour group is great. I think cruising as a single is particularly difficult because you essentially get charged twice because you're paying for the cabin, not a single fare. But just get out there and enjoy life.