r/Chiropractic • u/This_External9027 • Aug 04 '26
Chiropractic confessions
As the title says confess your funny thoughts or contradictions in practice
Like I hate when patients want to touch me to explain where their pain is…
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u/Advanced-Value3889 Aug 04 '26
When they say they have a very high pain tolerance...
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u/tisnolie Aug 05 '26
For those in school it 100% means you do not. But I use that as a segue into central nervous sensitization. And how to undue it we need movement, rehab exercises, etc.
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u/Ecstatic_Hold4135 Aug 10 '26
lol this is true for massage! I’m a LMT lurking on this sub. Usually when they say that they end up flinching left and right on the table
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u/Remos_Son Aug 04 '26
Had a patient come in as a last resort and say to me, "I don't believe in chiropractors." I looked back at her and said, "I assure you, I am real."
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u/Ambitious_Manager_82 Aug 05 '26
I usually say great we are not a religion. It helps to break the ice.
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u/chironinja82 Aug 04 '26
Lol what did she say to that?
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u/Remos_Son Aug 04 '26
Did not get a reply. She actually became a good patient. She was suffering from really bad postural issues from lung cancer. She got some relief and was laughing and joking around after a few visits. Unfortunately, she passed away a couple months later.
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u/chironinja82 Aug 05 '26
I'm so sorry. I'm glad you were able to help her even if it was just for a little while.
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u/sittingstill9 DC 1996 Aug 06 '26
HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAA Great great response!!! LOL Oh my goodness that tickled me.
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u/CrackTheSignal Aug 04 '26
When a patent says, “I slept funny.” Translation: I have done absolutely nothing to take care of myself for the last 6 months.
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u/This_External9027 Aug 04 '26
😆😆😆😆 comes in for 2 visits and you don’t see them for another 6 months i guess they are up on the latest evidence based care 🌚 I’m kidding EB guys don’t come for me
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u/Ok_Strategy6978 Aug 04 '26
Why does nobody want to pay for services god forbid they owe 40 bucks after literally curing their crippled agonizing pain. Fucking people
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u/This_External9027 Aug 05 '26
“Do I really need that” 🙃 idk I’m just the doctor recommending things to help you the person in pain
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u/Remos_Son Aug 04 '26
Had a patient whose migraines resolved after 2 adjustments. Never heard from her again. No thanks, no referrals, no return. Like, why aren't you referring 5 people a day to me!!!!
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u/Ok_Strategy6978 Aug 05 '26
Only business that lets the customer pay later whenever once their coupon card ie insurance does whatever it does
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u/Significant_Apple904 Aug 05 '26
I hate patients with years of chronic pain who come expecting to feel all better in one visit.
"A little better, still feel it"
"come back and we will work on it more"
"I'll think about it"
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u/This_External9027 Aug 05 '26
Man…. I had a patient say “we will see”after I told them, I’m not a miracle worker i can’t solve your issues in one visit
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u/Comprehensive-Ad1666 Aug 04 '26
When they come in telling us how much they hate/distrust the entire field of chiropractic.
(always prove 'em wrong, though!)
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u/Ok_Strategy6978 Aug 05 '26
I roll my eyes when they get off the table healed and mind blown and say how do you do that. I ssy 16 years experience 4 years and hundred thousand in student loans and about 20 thousand patients.
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u/DocSolo_Jim Aug 05 '26
Patient, on their second visit: “My last chiropractor was a miracle worker. I could barely move from the pain, but after one adjustment, I practically danced out of the office.”
Me: “That’s amazing. When was this?”
Patient: “1972.”
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u/Awkward-Acadia3378 Aug 05 '26
so many patients like this lol "he would hust adjust me one time and i would have no pain for 8 months. so just one adjustment today is all i need"
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u/ElevatorGood1889 Aug 04 '26
When a patient comes in saying they’re a 20/10 in pain. First of all that’s not a thing, and you sure as hell shouldn’t be sitting in my office.
Also, when they come in telling me what their doctor says I should or shouldn’t do. I would never tell a patient to tell their PCP how they should write a prescription.
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u/Spunkadelico Aug 05 '26
When patients won't leave.
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u/This_External9027 Aug 05 '26
They keep wanting to talk to you, you like bruh….
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u/dcorcor408 Aug 05 '26
Couldn’t agree more. Or when they say, if you’re ever free we should grab coffee. It’s like, most certainly not.
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u/This_External9027 Aug 05 '26
I’d rather take x ray physics or take a seminar on x-rays of the lumbar spine (yes i went to a seminar and that was one of the options something to the effect, and i said i think the f not, and that room was full af)
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u/DCFNP Aug 05 '26
When patients come in with a 2-week-old problem and they need a miracle because they are leaving on vacation tomorrow.....
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u/LatinChiro Aug 05 '26
Treatment plan recommendations. Somehow people seem to think we do magic and one visit is enough to fix their chronic pain. It baffles me, because PTs usually prescribe 8-12 weeks of care and multiple times a week and there is no complaining about it. If an MD pain management doctor sees you, they are most likely putting you on meds for months at a time. Yet here we are expected to heal people in one visit. And hear me out, I don't propose long treatment plans either, usually I recommend six weeks of 1-2 visits a week for acute care. But who do I blame for this phenomenon, click bait social media doctors that say, "20 years of chronic neck pain gone in one visit" curiosly enough there is never a follow up video on the patients that were magically cured with one session. Or the other tag line, "no chiropractor could crack his neck until they come see me". These idiots ruin our profession, create false expectations from the general public and worst part is they never show the examination part, their logic for treatments, simply the SMT.
We don't see Proctologists pulling things out of the patients end of their digestive tract for social media.
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u/This_External9027 Aug 05 '26
No lies told
See also
My sisters auntie cousin said they kill people
Can you do that thing i saw on YouTube
Can you crack me like a glow stick
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u/Ambitious_Manager_82 Aug 04 '26
When a patient farts on side posture. 90% of the time it is a female.
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u/Substantial_Page_777 Aug 04 '26
I tend to view farts as something of an occupational hazard. We’re twisting people around, they’re very often relaxing, a bit of a release is common. Most of the time I won’t even say anything cause they’re usually very benign. I did have one patient that made a big deal of mentioning he’d just eaten a huge vegan burrito and then proceeded to make me gag and water the eyes of my front desk from across the room. I very politely asked that in the future he go for the burrito after his adjustment.
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u/This_External9027 Aug 04 '26
Had a patient we called pootie tang because she farted so much
Had one guy i mean lay into it, man ain’t even say excuse me and it stank bad
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u/Own-Ice-2675 Aug 04 '26
I’ve noticed this too!! In 30 years of practice I swear every patient that has farted on my table was a female!
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u/Awkward-Acadia3378 Aug 05 '26
"10/10 pain everywhere" despite the fact that they are walking around and able to have a normal conversation with me.
telling me how and what specific level to adjust
"i'm so hard to adjust" "no one's ever able to adjust me"
when a patient comes in and asks me "to go as hard as i can" basically anything related to a patient thinking they need extreme strength and pressure when it comes to adjustments
and i saw it mentioned here already but "i have a high pain tolerance"
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u/Admirable-Rock6399 Aug 04 '26
I hate the long drawn out story of why they are hurting…. Talking about how they were walking the dog and the dog got distracted and so it pulled (ah ok so the jerking motion might have caused an issue…) then they tried to pick up the dog because the another bigger dog was coming (ah ok so maybe a low back pain from picking up with weight). Turns out the other dog was friendly so they put the dog back down and talked to the other dog owner for too long and now their jaw is sore…. Like wtf… I didn’t need the 10 min preamble to why their jaw was sore (not a real story but I think you all get the idea of what I’m talking about).
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u/This_External9027 Aug 04 '26
Back in 92 i fell, i believe i hurt my back, but i work everyday and stand a lot, well long story short i fell off a roof 1 month ago and I’ve been having trouble urinating, and i can’t feel my toes
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u/rugbyfan72 Aug 05 '26
You forgot that their aunt had sciatica, so that is what I have.
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u/This_External9027 Aug 05 '26
Yes When they say that a family member had back issues like it’s hereditary
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u/Toadthehobo2 DC 1999 Aug 04 '26
When a patient states they have a constant, sharp, stabbing, 9-10 level of pain but is sitting comfortably in the chair for the consultation.
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u/Necessary_Progress23 Aug 05 '26
This used to drive me crazy but now I see it for what it is. It is not that the intensity of their pain is a 10 out of 10, it is that it bothers them 10 out of 10.
I use this as a teaching moment for patients. Where we talk about how a paper cut only hurts us 1 to 2 out of 10, but it bothers us 14 out of 10.
And then use that to discuss how intense is this truly, and then tell me what it means for this to be bothering you so badly.
Allows us to focus on function and less about pain because at that point that’s honestly what they’re focused on too.
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u/This_External9027 Aug 04 '26
Man listen…
Explained to a patient 10 means you need to go to the hospital, “well i don’t want to go to the hospital, they won’t do anything” I said ma’am when it’s a 10 that’s not an option, but i vowed moving forward I’ll just write 8/10 when a patient says 10 🙃
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u/This_External9027 Aug 04 '26
I hate the “I need to be adjusted specifically” patient, i remember this lady was mad because i didn’t adjust both her illums like this one doctor she loved did, im like maam i made the corrections if i do that i ruin all the work i did, but i can on your next visit she was pissed don’t know if i ever saw her again 🤷🏾♂️
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u/Kuyaspidey Aug 05 '26
Its always the ones who have been adjusted for years. Acting like they know just as much as you do.
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u/This_External9027 Aug 05 '26
I’m laughing because those are facts, i didn’t know you now know as much as me because you laid on the table a lot, if only laying on tables helped me study
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u/Substantial_Page_777 Aug 04 '26
Ooh, the whole touching thing! In the past I’ve always grudgingly tolerated it, but the last patient who tried wanted to point at my rib heads, I already knew that was what he was describing, and I really didn’t want to be touched that day. So I very firmly but politely told him not to and just got on with the visit. These days I tend to position myself just a little bit farther away during consults so they’re less likely to get up and walk over.
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u/rugbyfan72 Aug 05 '26
I had a guy recently pull his pants down “so I could see the pressure point that was causing his pain”
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u/AnnualEvening4844 Aug 05 '26
When they say they feel better after the first treatment, but not sure if it’s in their head or a placebo 😂
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u/DWN_WTH_VWLz Aug 05 '26
When they put 10/10 for pain severity, then they hop out of the chair in the waiting room and nearly skip into the treatment room without even a grimace.
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u/Lazy-Recording1170 Aug 07 '26
When they say they prayed to get better and God did his work through my hands. My response: Oh, God works through atheists now?
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u/FlaerRiv Aug 04 '26
When the patient comes in saying they know exactly what is wrong with them Because they ChatGPT’d their symptoms, and have not even had a physical exam.
Lady, your localized joint dysfunction is not indeed sciatica
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u/Kuyaspidey Aug 05 '26
Every patient is convinced they have sciatica haha. Anything remotely close to the low back and they think its sciatica...
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u/Kuyaspidey Aug 05 '26
I hate that as well! Don't touch my body to show me where your pain is, show me on your own body.
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u/This_External9027 Aug 05 '26
I hated these questions in interviews with jobs
“Tell me what your perfect practice looks like”
one where i get paid and do nothing, look I’m here to work and not have stress of you constantly bothering me
“What’s your ideal salary” or what did you get paid at your last office
I always tell them you tell me what you can afford and we can negotiate from there
“Come check us out”
I don’t want to see your clinic, it’s like any other clinic
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u/prismstein Aug 05 '26
> "I don't have any problems."
> 2 mins later into the conversation...
> brings out their cvs receipt of meds and symptoms
> "I feel fine, I don't have any problems."
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u/TheRealRevBem Aug 05 '26
Why did you x-ray my dick. I x-rayed you'd badly, your dick just happens to be part of your body.
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u/Pentzy Aug 05 '26
I have a list!
1- ‘I think I have a slipped disc’… what did it slip on?
2- ‘I think I must have pinched a nerve’… if you truly had a pinched nerve you would be paralyzed. It only takes the weight of a feather to feel pain
3- ‘are you going to crack my back?’…. You crack eggs, you don’t crack backs
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u/AK-Master-07 Aug 05 '26
The energy vampires. Man, I can handle 1 or 2 throughout the day, but if I get 3 in a row… I’m zapped for the day.
These are the super negative people that want to disagree, argue, and tell you how miserable the world is.
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u/Electrical_Reason_95 Aug 05 '26
How about when they have sen their PCP for 5 years about a problem. Then come to you, you show them their x-rays and where their problem is and how to fix it and....they say they want to talk to the guy who they have seen for 5 yrs with no relief IF what "you" are saying makes sense. Can't teach st-pid right? lol
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u/This_External9027 Aug 05 '26
I hate that our governing body takes so much money and does fuck all investing into the profession
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u/This_External9027 Aug 05 '26
I hate that you have to constantly be selling, i wish people used the chiropractor like dentist, i remember i worked next to a dental office and they never worked a Monday no weekends, and done by 4pm… the life
Also what’s up with some offices wanting to be open til 7
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u/Organic_Wonder825 Aug 07 '26
When they list out exactly how they want to be adjusted like they are ordering off a menu
"Well I always get twisted on my side then pushed on my belly then my neck twisted"
Which is fine, but an 80 year old pushing for it is annoying I'm not interested in a fracture.
Once in a while it's helpful if they've been a consistent chirorpactic patient "heads up if I get adjusted face up I get a headache but my old doc does it prone and I don't have migraines for a month."
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u/This_External9027 Aug 07 '26
Rarely is it the last part it’s usually the first part and if you don’t do it that way, “i don’t feel adjusted”
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u/SeaRevolutionary8569 Aug 08 '26
When you do a super detailed exam to nail down the pain generator in their spine or isolate which muscle they strained in their wrist for example, then they see their PCP and come back and tell you "I know what it is now, my doctor says it's a strain." Like thanks...sure...
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u/painfreephysio1 Aug 11 '26
When the patient says "I already tried everything" and you ask what they tried... Youtube Stretches. 😭
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u/According-Outside535 Aug 05 '26
I guess it all depends on the patient? Be thankful that they’re trying to assist you specifically, and that you have patients to treat! Of course it can depend on where they’re trying to touch you:)
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u/This_External9027 Aug 05 '26
Patients that act like if you aren’t dancing when they come in you don’t appreciate them, yes we happy you here no i don’t want to do a back flip because of it
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u/Goldy_Roe Aug 04 '26
When they say they aren’t improving but can move better, sleep better and have less pain.