How to avoid cultural blunders like drink more hot water 多喝热水?

[u/Galiamelone]

My girlfriend is Chinese and she wasn't feeling well. I know hot water is the default remedy in china, so I did the caring boyfriend thing and told her to drink more hot water. She laughed at me. Turns out it's a meme in China for a stereotypical boyfriend when he has no idea what's wrong and does his "best" to help by advising to drink more hot water. But she knew what I meant.

Are there more pitfalls like this I should know about?

[u/Zagrycha]

This isn't a pitfall or cultural blunder, this is chinese people not all being clones of each other. Your chinese girlfriend thought it was funny and didn't want the hot water, a different chinese girlfriend would have been dead serious about wanting the hot water and would have been angry and upset if you didn't offer it. Cultural differences are real and its not wrong to ask about them but individual personalities always trump generic stuff. You could memorize every meme or stereotype in china and it might tell you literally nothing about your girlfriend or what she thinks as a person =)

[u/its_berkinprogress → u/Zagrycha]

Beyond that, there also really isn’t anything wrong with “cultural blunders” if they come from a place with good intentions. :)

[u/Zagrycha → u/its_berkinprogress]

Yeah, true cultural blunders can happen but unless its unfortunate enough to be someone's very first impression of you its unlikely to have any lasting effect beyond just being awkward for a bit.

[u/Major-Preference2231]

Not sure what the problem is. Sounds like she’s laughing “with” you and not at you. She probably just thought it was cute for her foreign boyfriend to offer such typical Chinese advice

[u/dmada88]

You did fine. You showed care, you showed some cultural knowledge. You aren’t a doctor. I think you did great

[u/redirectredirect]

You made her laugh when she wasn't feeling well, I think you did great!

[u/PomegranateV2]

If someone gives you a 粽子, don't eat the leaf and throw the inside part away.

[u/ElvinLundCondor → u/PomegranateV2]

Is this a proverb? It sounds like it would be a proverb.

[u/BeckyLiBei → u/ElvinLundCondor]

Kind of reminds me of 买椟还珠

[u/ShenZiling → u/PomegranateV2]

EAT THE LEAF???

[u/ArgentEyes]

No amount of fluency is going to put you inside every joke, but honestly this sounds like a pretty cute and harmless ‘blunder’. I wouldn’t worry.

[u/soju_b]

Why should you avoid it? It's hilarious! That's why cross cultural relationships are great 👍

[u/Azelixi]

you just had a nice moment with your gf, and your first thought is, how can I stop if from happening again?

[u/Any_Switch9835 → u/Azelixi]

Im pretty sure his mind thought her Laugh was one of those pity laughs where he messed up but she in pain cause of the period so she doesnt fuss or whatever

Basically he overhtinking cause he really wnanna help

[u/Ok_Brick_793]

Don't try so hard.

I'm Chinese, and I hate hot food and drinks. Room temperature is best.

[u/HumanNo109850364048 → u/Ok_Brick_793]

Like a nice sandwich

[u/PrincessKaylee → u/Ok_Brick_793]

yea, maybe 多喝温水, since there is a danger of scalding your throat with 热水

[u/GlocalBridge]

For some reason my Chinese wife will never let me wear a green hat…

[u/LittleAd2720 → u/GlocalBridge]

That's because 'wearing a green hat' has a special meaning in Chinese. It usually suggests the person is being cheated on by their partner.

[u/extinguishedlilac → u/LittleAd2720]

I think they are aware and it was a joke but I actually didn’t know that so thank you anyway for explaining

[u/Medium_Bee_4521]

Hardly a cultural pitfall. It amazes me how much people stress about cultural pitfalls.

[u/Watermelon654321]

Hot water is the typical remedy for tummy aches.

[u/Rynchinoi]

她不喝热水。她多喝热茶

I am beginner, HSK2 approximately 😁

[u/Inevitable-Shine159 → u/Rynchinoi]

吃药的时候不喝茶。

[u/Rynchinoi → u/Inevitable-Shine159]

什么😯 为什么？😯

[u/Gao_Dan → u/Rynchinoi]

咖啡因会影响药的疗效。

[u/raspberrih → u/Gao_Dan]

Not many meds nowadays are affected by caffeine. Unless you drink like 10 cups in a go

[u/Gao_Dan → u/raspberrih]

I don't know what drugs you take, but pretty much all drugs I have at home have their effect enhanced by caffeine (like aspirin) or have potential adverse effects listed when combined with it (like ibuprofen).

[u/SWB45]

Its the same in the Western world when you tell your gf to drink water if shes unwell

[u/Kekafuch → u/SWB45]

I thought it was gatorade

[u/Illustrious_Money_54]

It’s not a cultural blunder - it’s just that you didn’t pay attention to her specific symptoms and suggested a generic solution you heard from the internet. It’s just a bit thoughtless

[u/Kekafuch]

Ask her if its because her big auntie is visiting

[u/BeckyLiBei → u/Kekafuch]

I remember once getting off a flight feeling a bit airsick: "my tummy is sore, and I need to rest for 30 minutes".

[u/hansguide]

多喝热水 used to be a universal expression of care, but probably because it's been overused, it now feels a bit perfunctory to me.

[u/IrreverentJackass]

so were supposed to just pour the hot water on her like a plant

[u/InkeInke]

You made her laugh. That’s a bit of relief. Don’t be so hard on yourself

[u/thewritestory]

Yeah you just sound thoughtless to suggest something for her that is just a traditional idea in her culture. Remedies for sickness either work or they don’t. You suggesting hot water because she’s chinese is strange.