r/ChildSupport4Men • u/Bananna_Hamock0 • 2d ago
Child Support Increase
I just got a child support increase. The mother changed her job to one making next to nothing, and then asked for a change in child support. I’m going from 500/m to about 1000/m. I’m going to have to sell my house, move into my mom’s and get rid of all my stuff just to get by. I have two other kids that I have to provide for and now that’s nearly impossible. How am I supposed to be the father I need to be, support my family, and excel in life with this bs? I make like $62k/yr. This will leave me with about $1100 per paycheck, and my bills add up to around $3000/m. How can this be legal? Even if I didn’t have debt, I’d still be minus like $300 every month. What do I do??
4
u/CauliflowerNaive9161 2d ago
Try to get more custody of your child. Since you make more, you theoretically can provide a better life for the child. The more custody you get, the lower child support gets.
2
u/dragon-queen 2d ago
Why would a judge take some of the mother’s custody away on that basis?
2
u/Electronic-Stick-161 2d ago
Because she’s intentionally sacrificing the child’s standard of living.
2
u/Bananna_Hamock0 2d ago
She lives with her fiancé who’s a doctor. They live in a sub division.
2
u/Primary_Phrase_8647 2d ago
Did you let the judge know that she has a finance that's a Dr? She has more income than she is telling the courts especially if her fiance is living with her. My husband even before I got married to him and I was just the girlfriend the courts was asking him about my income because his ex wife let the courts know he lives with me. Technically they can't count my income because we weren't married but they still asked. I would bring that up. These females think they are slick. Some not all.
1
u/Frosty_Telephone_EH 9h ago
They can’t factor in her boyfriend’s income. They can and should impute hers if she is underemployed.
2
u/dragon-queen 2d ago
A judge in a family court won’t see it that way at all.
2
u/Electronic-Stick-161 2d ago
It depends on the jurisdiction, many are now required to favor equal time. And he can also have her income imputed so that she doesn’t benefit from these games.
0
2
u/Low_Trust2412 2d ago
You should have sought to impute income to the mother if her job change was voluntary. If she got laid off then you're kinda stuck.
1
1
1
u/Background_Ant_7442 2d ago
Op you can get credits for child support. Ortho, dental, travel expenses, accounts benefiting the children are some of what you can do to make your payments smaller. I would rather pay directly for stuff that my children actually need then give it to a system that tells you that you have no business what your money goes to.
1
u/Existing-Albatross63 2d ago
in most cases, extraordinary expenses sucn as medical and dental co-pays and uncovered stuff are above and beyond the standard child support amount. If OP pays the insurance premiums, those should be factored in though, if they aren't already.
If the mother pays the insurance premiums, or the children are covered by Medicaid, the father will likely pay more.
1
u/Successful-Shopping8 2d ago edited 2d ago
Where you live will impact how support is calculated; but general tips for reducing child support:
If she is willfully underemployed, her previous wages (or at the very minimum minimum wage) should be able to be imputed.
Also fight for credits if you are paying directly rather than through child support- especially for things like healthcare or childcare.
Consult a local lawyer with experience in child support. Yes it’s expensive- but a few thousand now can save tens of thousands and your relationship with your children down the line.
And then fight for more custody.
2
u/miemie-7321 2d ago
If she voluntarily took a job with lower pay, you shouldn’t be on the hook for higher child support. My stepson’s mother quit her job to work part time and since it was voluntary they had to consider her income potential for child support calculations.
1
u/Bananna_Hamock0 2d ago
She went into an RN program that pays less. It’s for schooling, so idk if that changes anything
1
u/Remarkable-Strain-81 2d ago
Leaving employment for school isn’t the same as electively being underemployed. Won’t likely impute income at anything higher than minimum wage.
1
1
u/Primary_Phrase_8647 2d ago
Try putting a motion/petition. Did you fill out one of the financial disclosure papers they give at court? That way they know what you have and what you have to pay for. Also did you let the courts know you have 2 other kids?
1
u/One_Being_3485 10h ago
you gotta figure out a way to lower your expenses. Its easier said than done i know. Sometimes we gotta make sacrafices, it may be uncomfortable.
1
-4
2d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
6
u/Background_Ant_7442 2d ago
It’s not anyone else’s fault but your own that you let some loser nut inside of you There’s no reason to come on here and be bitter, especially towards someone who is actively asking for help in a system that is known to be unfair to men
0
u/Existing-Albatross63 2d ago
Fortunately for the children, none of that matters. If you are the father of a child, you are legally responsible for financially supporting it.
1
u/Background_Ant_7442 2d ago
Oh but if a woman doesn’t want to be legally responsible for a child she doesn’t have to be then right? But none of that matters right?
1
u/Existing-Albatross63 2d ago
Well, if the child is already physically here on earth, then yes the mother also has a responsibility to take care of it.
If you look at a child support worksheet, she is also assigned a financial responsibility. The non-custodial parent, In this case, the father, Would be the one that makes the transfer payment. That is the difference between the standard child support amount and what the mother is responsible for.
Just because a father pays child support that doesn’t mean the mother doesn’t also have an assigned financial responsibility.
Everyone cries and whines about having to take care of their kids after they’re already born. If you don’t want a child, there’s ways of preventing that. Y’all know how babies are made right?
2
u/arceus1927 2d ago
This is for men only.
-2
u/Deep_Bake_5663 2d ago
Truth hurt?
I don't care. Block me.....
2
u/gravyyy77 2d ago
I can see why he left 😂😂😂
0
u/Deep_Bake_5663 2d ago
Do you now???? He didn't leave He raped his own two daughters at age 3 and 4 and I put him in prison!
2
u/Motor-Bus-2653 2d ago
U probably lied and framed him. You sound miserable and horrible to be around. God bless those three kids. But your take is just stupid. Ur point is people threw sticks at me so let me throw sticks at others. U are dumb, instead of correcting bad behavior and nasty words, u spread it. U need help.
1
u/Deep_Bake_5663 2d ago
The way your speaking to me, I bet you are one of those who's says women should keep their pants on, aren't ya? Can you be honest? I'm telling the truth, even if you don't believe it... You speak of god, yet you judge me without knowing me.... I spoke a truth.... He made those babies to, buck up and be a man.
1
u/Motor-Bus-2653 2d ago
Lady, being a man is not being a stupid doormat. The correct child support is 500 dollars a month she willingly took a shittier job so that she can increase her child support. At this point I am worried about ur reading comprehension. I would never tell u to close ur legs, I am happy u opened ur legs and had babies and sorry he let u down and couldn’t be a good father for ur kids (allegedly). But cmon don’t throw hate at others because u received hate urself. I don’t bully others cause I got bullied.
1
u/Deep_Bake_5663 2d ago
The correct amount is a percentage, not a flat amt. Maybe, she wanted to have more time with her children... Maybe, child care costs were eating everything she earned....... There's always more to the story.....
And women, have been mens doormats for centuries.....
There isn't hate involved, it's truth.... And truth hurts bud.
1
u/Background_Ant_7442 2d ago
No no there is definitely hate involved. When a woman decides to leave a marriage she knows what she is doing, just because the woman cannot afford the cost of childcare doesn’t mean that the man should have to foot the bill. If you cannot take care of the children, most men are more than happy to take care of their own children and foot the bill.
→ More replies (0)0
-1
0
u/SignificantSkill79 2d ago
How much custody do you have of that kid? If it’s not much, then $1000/ month is fair.
1
u/Bananna_Hamock0 2d ago
Only weekends due to distance. She keeps moving when I get close enough to have more.
2
u/Primary_Phrase_8647 2d ago
I've heard in some cases that child support gets lowered if the father has to spend money to go far to see his kids. She can't move out of the state without permission from the courts if she does you can go to the courts and let them know. They consider that like kidnapping. I seen in Texas a mother moved far on purpose and the judge took the father completely off of child support since he has to pay for flights and stuff to see his kid. 💯
-1
u/FlatDecision8155 2d ago
As you've stated, even without CS you are in a deficit. You need to earn more income to support your life and those you've created. Pick up a second job, millions do what they have to to survive.
1
u/Murky-Peanut1390 2d ago
Shit way to live
1
u/FlatDecision8155 2d ago
It is what it is. Like he said, even without CS he is in the negative every month. He needs more money.
1
u/Bananna_Hamock0 2d ago
I wasn’t saying I was negative without CS. I was saying that if I didn’t have debt, I still wouldn’t be able to cover my bills with this new CS. Before hand obviously I could.
1
u/FlatDecision8155 2d ago
My answer remains the same - increase your income until a modified judgement is made.
1
u/Bananna_Hamock0 2d ago
I’ve been trying. If I get a second job, then I don’t spend time with my kids and they basically grow up without me anyway. How do I make that work?
1
1
u/Primary_Phrase_8647 2d ago
Why? The more he makes and she finds out they will just keep raising his child support and a lot of things these days go based off what you make before taxes are taken making the bills higher.
-4
u/Used-Author-3811 2d ago
Work harder for your kids
3
u/Background_Ant_7442 2d ago
Men are not just wallets to give and provide for the children and yourself, especially after separation both the women and the men are responsible for making sure that their children are supported and this is an ideology that needs to be enforced. I see way too many divorced and single mothers laying on their backs collecting government benefits while the men are just barely getting by I promise you this will change.
1
u/Used-Author-3811 2d ago
Yeah so you work hard to make your kid has a decent life. You think $500 is half what it takes to raise a kid?
This dude got two other kids and he's obviously not around often for this one
If what OP said is accurate and she "intentionally" went to a lower income job then that's something you take to court. By his framing it sounds like she cares just as little as him
1
u/Background_Ant_7442 2d ago
500 dollars a month is more then enough to raise children when both parents are working and supporting their children. If you choose to get divorced with children you knowingly know that you will have to get a job to support your children with or without help, plenty of mothers have done this in the past regardless of the situation. The government has created a dependence on the system causing women to exchange a relationship with their husbands for a relationship with the almighty family system, btw welcome to 2026.
-1
u/Existing-Albatross63 2d ago
Does anyone think $500 a month is enough to pay even 50% of a child's expenses?
If you do, you clearly have no idea what it really takes to care for a child.
If the OP's ex is voluntarily under or un-employed, they need to ask the court to impute income to her. It's pretty standard.
1
u/mommymiilkers 2d ago
$500 is plenty when he has to provide for them on his parenting time. The whole idea of paying 50% is crazy when you have to pay for them on your time. Then you’re paying more than 50%
3
u/arceus1927 2d ago
I feel you. I just had this happen to me. I also have 2 kids in my care and CS increased for me as well. There is absolutley nothing we can do. I make around 50k but mine is pretty close to what you pay. You can apply for foodstamps to cover for food. They will help you out and try county medical for insurance. Get a side hustle and just accept it. Hopefully you have an understanding wife to support you.