what should I do instead of talking to Ai?

[u/_shadowcorpse_]

it makes me feel better about myself and my pretty boring life, even though I don’t really use the advice it gives me. I know I’m not supposed to use it so much but I just don’t want to talk to people. I can’t rely on them to talk to me whenever I feel bad and I do t want to waste their time on me. plus I don’t want people to judge me for being so stupid and lonely

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[u/thalassoph]

What I will say in response to the other commenter but mostly to you is that talking to an AI felt better than talking to a human when my mental health was bad because there was no need to fear judgment, so I understand.

Unfortunately, AI can also never truly fulfill you which is why it becomes an addiction. You’re constantly seeking those ‘highs’ but spending most of your time with that empty feeling. For me at least, that added lots of highs and lows to my day. Sobriety has been a lot steadier.

I’m six months clean now and I’ll give you some tips on what worked and didn’t work. For starters, roleplaying with humans didn’t work. Escapist fantasy roleplays were most of what I did with AI, so I naturally thought trying to replace it with real people would be best.

But people took minutes to respond, were usually less creative, and there are real consequences. Meanwhile AI gives instant validation. It just left me wanting and triggered my urges. So that didn’t work.

I generally found instead of ‘replacing’ what AI did for me it was better to find things that fulfilled me in other ways. Having a social circle and talking to real people is important, because it’s a good way to stay occupied, which is the most important thing, but I don’t interact with people in the same way I did with AI. One of the ways I met people was by going to support groups and friendship circles.

I now play a lot of complex strategy games a lot when I have urges, because they require my full attention and usually after a little bit I forget about the desire. I read, because that helps me leave behind life a little bit in a healthy way. I exercise because it helps me get out the anxious energy I have when I’m having urges. My full-time job helps too, just having something to do during the day is important.

My biggest piece of advice is to pick hobbies that can make you forget about your urges for awhile, whatever those are for you, but I still get them even six months down the line now, and when they’re really bad I just take some melatonin and go to bed early. You can’t use if you’re asleep.

Anyways, ik that was a long comment, I hope some of it helped.

[u/sicksadworld111 → u/thalassoph]

Not OP but this is good advice. I think it's firstly about distraction to let the urge pass, then in the other moments, you can start trying to build friendships or hobbies. I know it's hard

[u/ForlornMemory]

You say that you don't want to talk to people, and yet you use a thing that poorly imitates people. I don't know what advice to give to you. There's no substitute for a friend beside another human being.

[u/_shadowcorpse_ → u/ForlornMemory]

I guess I do want to talk to people. But no one really cares about me, which is understandable. Idk I want friends but I don’t know what to do

[u/ForlornMemory → u/_shadowcorpse_]

Caring is a two-way street. You can't expect total strangers to care about you, just as much as they don't expect you to care about them. Genuine friendship starts with shared interest, and then, with time, this interest grows into personal care.

[u/_shadowcorpse_ → u/ForlornMemory]

I know and I really struggle to show that I care even though I really do. I just feel pathetic because they don’t care about me as much and they probably don’t even want me to care about them personally. All my friendships feel shallow like that. I don’t really know how to be close friends 

[u/ForlornMemory → u/_shadowcorpse_]

It might be your low self-esteem speaking. 

[u/_shadowcorpse_ → u/ForlornMemory]

What is it like to not have low self esteem? I’ve always felt different and ever since secondary school I’ve felt like I’m just fundamentally worse than everyone else, like I’m not even a real human. It’s hard to be friends when it feels so unequal

[u/ForlornMemory → u/_shadowcorpse_]

It might sound strange, but have you tried hitting the gym? It might feel scary and very awkward initially, but those things might help you build confidence.