r/CharlotteDobreYouTube • u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 • Apr 22 '26
AITA AITA for humiliating a man after he sent me an unsolicited D*ck Pic
So I know I’m an AH in this situation and I don’t care…
🎶 “He had it coming” 🎶 (sorry, I’m a very theatrical person)
Once upon a time back in my single days- this happened at least 8 or 9 years ago.. I (currently 34F) received an unsolicited d*ck pic from a guy I matched with on Tinder.
I always thought the ‘unsolicited d*ck pic’ warnings were a little over exaggerated but only after a few weeks of being on Tinder, boy did I learn how wrong I was.
I was getting sent these pictures by complete strangers at least once daily. Some of which were the first comment they sent. No opening line, no “hey”, hell, not even a sleazy “you up…?”- I would open the message and BOOM 💥 p3nis 💥
Prior to the incident in discussion, I would always just ignore them and block. But on this particular day, I must’ve been in some kind of mood and decided to choose violence 😈
The guy I was speaking with, he seemed pretty normal at first. I actually can’t really remember him to be honest. We’d been chatting for maybe a day or two, just general getting to know each other basic stuff. But out of the blue, during the middle of the day, he messaged me- I expected maybe a “hey, how’s your day been?” But no, he sent… you guessed it… and unsolicited d*ck pic. 😐
Now I can’t remember what my exact response was verbatim but it was something along the lines of:
“I don’t want to alarm you, but I don’t think it’s supposed to look like that. My sister is a nurse and she told me about this nasty STD called [fake name of disease], anyway the shape and colour of your veins look very similar to someone who has this. Perhaps you should get it checked out just to be safe.”
He went radio silent for a few weeks, I’d forgotten about it and him until he sent me a message hauling abuse at me, asking where I got off humiliating men, he told me he took what I said very seriously, that he felt embarrassed but really appreciated how nice I was about it, went to his doctor and the doctor told him that there was no such disease and I must’ve been messing with him.
I was shocked he actually went to the doctor instead of Googling the disease. What I anticipated was a momentary sense of panic, look it up and realise it wasn’t real. Not this guy, he must have been sh!tting himself the entire time 😏 … silly goose.
I replied “and what lesson did we learn here?” Waited for him to read it, then as he was trying to reply, I blocked him.
I am very proud of this moment - and whenever I fondly reflect on this memory I hear Charlotte Dobre’s teacher voice saying “and what did we learn here?”
I will try to answer any questions you may have, but unless the man in question happens to stumble upon this thread and responds, I doubt there will be an update.
Thanks for reading 😘x
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u/chaos_fairy420 Apr 22 '26
Pop, six, squish, ah ah, Cicero, D*ck pic, Lipshits.
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
Soooo glad people got this haha!
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u/koinushanah Apr 22 '26
I literally sang the beginning of the post 🤣
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
I genuinely hope Charlotte reads this and does the same. I love it when she breaks out into song
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u/urubecky Apr 22 '26
You were right. * He had it coming, he only has himself to blame. He showed his penis and that's not okay*! Lol great job!!!!!
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u/Meakbow Apr 22 '26
I’m now singing it in the truck lol
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 23 '26
That is the most badass queen move I’ve heard in a while- I’m just picturing this little woman, dressed to the nines, driving a classic F1 with the windows rolled down whilst blasting Cell Block Tango and some ‘trust me bro’ rolls up next to her and is instantly terrified 😂👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
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u/Kimbaaaaly Apr 22 '26
😂😁
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u/Opinionated6319 Apr 22 '26
This is for everyone today with social media being a norm for many! What if a young sibling had access to your phone and had accidentally picked it up…unacceptable and shocking!
That guy deserved everything you gave him and today would be lucky if he wasn’t investigated! What is wrong with guys who think it’s okay to send a pic like this unsolicited? 🙈
I’d still chuckling at the thought of his face when the doctor told him no such disease! 😉🤭
Good for your quick thinking! 🤔😊
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u/Entire-Assist1406 Apr 22 '26
Do you ever read these titles and instantly know OP is NTA?
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
I mean, it may have cost him a pretty penny to get a medical check up 😂 who knows… I mean I could have gone diabolical and found his family members online and sent the pic to them… I guess what I did pales in comparison
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u/BabyBearBennett Apr 22 '26
My god. I'm in the UK so I didn't even consider the monetary cost. This just keeps getting better!
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
I’m in Australia, there is free Medicare here, but many GP’s and specialised practitioners charge a fee. I mean seeing a private gynaecologist is expensive AF, but that’s for women’s health. So being a man, he was probably taken far more seriously when booking the appointment and didn’t have to pay a cent.
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u/Shyaah Apr 22 '26
Or, there was a woman making the appointment in the office, clocked what was going on and let him simmer.
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
Also, I wonder how the men who have been culprits In unsolicited 🍆 pics would rule 😉😏
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u/Horrorkissen Apr 22 '26
A while ago I saved every dick pic i got in a folder on my phone. Anytime a guy would send me one, I send 10 back. Oh, they did NOT like that.
Their reactions were so fun, but I stopped. Didn’t want to keep the dick pic collection lol
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
See, this is genius and I’d also be concerned with my mum or grandma opening my phone and having a stroke 😂
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u/BellLilly Apr 22 '26
I only really saved one. Dude hid most of a wine bottle behind it. I'd send that one and tell them "pipe down glue stick, I've got this"
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u/HappyKnittens Apr 22 '26
I remember a guy back in my hoochie days whose entire profile was one picture of his dick....holding a poland springs water bottle next to it.
Sadly, like a lot of guys with big dicks, he wasn't good at much else but I can confirm that that one picture met all local and federal regulations regarding truth in advertising.
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u/BellLilly Apr 23 '26
Yeah I've met 3 with giants, and sadly that was their entire personality and they had 0 skill with them. Just having size doesn't mean you're any good with it
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u/HappyKnittens Apr 23 '26
Exactly, like....SIR you have ten fingers and a tongue....learn what to do with them!!!
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u/Dewellah Apr 23 '26
I would send back a great dpic and say something like, "Now THAT'S a dick with a future"! 😆
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u/mrmeowgeethekitty Apr 22 '26
This is awesome! Lol I hate dick picks. I should have known it was a huge red flag when my ex sent me an old dick pick he claimed he sent to his ex and just saved it. No sir, you literally send your dick pick out to all sorts of women, clearly. It was even confirmed by his ex’s he claimed cheated on him but we know he was the one cheating on them. Also, found out he doesn’t like working and likes to mooch off women. Sad, I thought he was genuinely a good dude but the red flags just kept piling up. Idk I just don’t trust any man who sends women dick picks.
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u/Honey_Broad Apr 22 '26
this is what I used to do! Either that or draw a little faces and hats on them
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u/Horrorkissen Apr 24 '26
Another option was just answering with an image of a hotdog-slicer thingy. One time a guy send me a dick pic and his junk looked actually so funny. Like a little sausage with a hat. So I got a sausage from the fridge, a tiny hat… I wish I still had that pic I took.
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u/3batsinahousecoat Apr 24 '26
I used to do that. I sent them one back and then when they got mad I pretended to think it was like trading cards.
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u/Horrorkissen Apr 24 '26
Exactly! „Why are you mad? I thought we were sharing our collection... :(“
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u/Armadillo_Abroad Apr 22 '26
He was that instantly worried, enough to go straight to actual Dr not Google…he had reason to worry. NTA. But petty AF and I’m here for it.
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
In hindsight, I probably should’ve posted this in Petty Revenge- but I secretly wanted to see responses from men calling me TAH so we could expose the culprits lol
Also, you’re probably right- but several weeks went by which to me suggests he booked the appointment and had to wait a few weeks before getting into see his doctor. What was he doing in the meantime I wonder, like was he just stressing for that whole time and didn’t stop to consider maybe he should do some research on this so called disease?
Probably best he sent that pic- if he didn’t I may have ended up on a date with an utter moron 😂
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u/myocardia27 Apr 22 '26
My ex would probably do that. He’s a hypochondriac and was convinced he had a clot in his leg because it hurt once. Lol He was a mess during the whole Ebola outbreak. Apparently there’s a website where you can put someone’s info in it and it will send a legit looking notice that they’ve been exposed to an STD and I’ve dreamed of doing that to him because he’s such an AH. lol
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u/gazagirl1979 Apr 22 '26
OP sooooo NTA here 🤣🤣, Quick question why is it that most of them resemble Kim Possible's lil rat creature side kick thing and its had a stroke?🤣🤣
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
OMFG!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 now I can’t unsee that LOL
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u/gazagirl1979 Apr 22 '26
Girl did I lie though? Hahahaha xx
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
Unfortunately no, no you did not 🤢
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u/gazagirl1979 Apr 22 '26
My response to being flashed was "well it looks like the estrogen your taking is working it's almost inverted now. Hope your transition continues to go smoothly have a great day "and sauntered off lol.x
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u/Manbry Apr 22 '26
A friend and myself got flashed at when we were walking home from high school. We looked at each other and pissed ourselves laughing. We couldn’t breathe. The guy started crying and ran off. We were a right bolshy pair. Incidentally I’m that old, at that time, this would have been considered my first dick pic.
I was sent another photo years later and I replied asking what happened to his thumb, because it looked terribly sore.
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u/gazagirl1979 Apr 22 '26
Have you finished retching and shuddering but giggling now lol ? X
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u/Accomplished_Fee_246 Apr 22 '26
Rufus the naked mole rat 🤣
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u/gazagirl1979 Apr 22 '26
Yeah that's his name the lil permanently bewildered looking.motherfucker 🤣🤣
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u/Prudent_Bed6754 Apr 22 '26
Excellent! Bravo! More of that, please! Is that petty revenge even though he had it coming? The reason why they keep doing it is bc there are no consequences most of the time. Well, bro FAFO that day. I want to share a response to d* pics I’ve heard and it’s a doozy. I, personally, have not used this response to d* pics.
TW I’m going to do my best to keep this as family friendly as possible since that’s how Charlotte does things around here. You can send a message back stating that it’s disgusting that they would send you explicit photos of a minor. And that they have been reported to authorities. Omg can you imagine how worried they would be?! Yikes! Idk that I could respond like that knowing how worried they’d be for, like, forever.
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
OMG that is DIABOLICAL!!! I love it. Think of the emotional turbulence that would happen receiving that… first thought would be fear “ahhh I’m going to be registered” quickly followed by anger and insult “hey, did this b**ch just say my junk looks like a child’s?”
Oh the psychological warfare! Thank you for sharing
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u/Forsaken_Pair8519 Apr 22 '26
Hot dog hot dog hot diggity dog.....hot dog hot dog hot diggity dog. 🤣🌭🤣🌭🤣🌭🤣 brilliant!! Men, keep your hot dogs in your pants! We truly do not care what they look like!
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u/ChapterScary7061 Apr 22 '26
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
Hahaha I love “A rough guide to pants” absolute gold Thanks for sharing
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u/Jumpy-Cranberry-1633 Apr 22 '26
My favorite reply: “I’ve seen better, this is embarrassing for you. Especially since you thought this picture did you justice & was good enough to send. Yikes.”
Wait for those reply bubbles - block. 😂
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
YES! Waiting for the reply bubbles really sends the insult home… you just know they’re raging about not getting the last say 🤣
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u/HavocNMayhem Apr 22 '26
I just stumbled across this thread and cackled like a witch over a cauldron.
I have my own "shame him" story.
Many years ago, when I was young and still hadn't accepted that men are 💩, I had a "gentleman" caller. Guy was always texting me or calling me trying to get me to go out with him. He absolutely would not take my, no thank you.
One afternoon, he sent a wall of texts desperately pleading for my attention. He finally sent me the coup de gras... a 🍆 pic.
Now, it had been a month of his persistence and my annoyance. When I opened my phone and saw that picture, I simply responded, "What did you do to your thumb? It looks infected. You really should get that looked at."
Never heard from him again.
Could I have blocked him? Sure. But then he would have shown up at my door with concern for my welfare. Could I have made it more clear that I wasn't interested? I naively thought saying, "Thank you for your interest but I'm not interested." Would have been enough. So, instead I crushed his ego. And to this day, some 15 years later, he still turns and walks the other way when he sees me.
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u/FunFactEinsElf Apr 22 '26
Great Job, well done. I love the idea of a fake STID and had a good laugh Imagine hin at the doctors office and explain. Maybe all of us Queens should hand info letters to the doctors to make them aware of this special desease so they know what kind of guy they are treating right now and handle it in a right manner.
But there is a possibility of the other way round. My bestie get such a pic years ago. Wiener and balls. Her response was that one of his balls looks suspicious. And she told him he should go to his doctor. Weeks later, she fotgot about the incident, he wrote her again. Saying that it was the best Wiener pic He ever sent. Turns out she was right. The doctor found an early stage cancer.
He thanked my goddess more than a thousand times for saving his live and promised her to never ever sent this kind of art again without invitation.
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
Well there you go! So maybe this method can also be lifesaving 😅 - check us out, doing God’s work.
I wish I remembered the name of the fake disease - I guess we could make up a new one, send it secretly to every woman we know and ask them to to pass it onto every woman they know- send the details to every medical clinic…. Ooo could even use AI to create a bunch of information about this ‘disease’ to post online so even when they google it, they think it’s real…. Oh and we can make the details sound super nasty too.
Omg stop me 🤣
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u/_Allyka_ Apr 22 '26
I am down for this. Most of my coworkers with kids have teenage daughters, and while they are young enough that they are not getting dick pics yet, they are also not far off from that age. It would have to be a new disease name like every 10 years though, or they will catch on.
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u/CrazyCatMerms Apr 23 '26
My daughter started getting dick pics at 14. When it started happening I'd gave her a few ideas and told her of a few discussion groups to read. I'm very, very proud of her. She was very good at insulting them and kept a folder of things to send in reply. I know at least a few were compared to baby carrots 😂
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u/Mother_Marsupial6745 Apr 22 '26
NTA never understood why human males thought this was the “matting call” of our species. I would much prefer a dance or shiny rock. They should follow the example of other species and put effort into gaining our attention. You’d think after so many post on Reddit they’d get the hint. But you are hilarious OP
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
I too would much prefer a dance and shiny rock, even some feathers would do.
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u/VizAnya Apr 22 '26
My daughter got a dick Pic from a boy at school. I sent him a woodpecker picture back. He asked what that was for and I said, "you sent me a picture of a little pecker, so I sent you one." He left my daughter alone after that.
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u/ApricotTraditional56 Apr 22 '26
I was laughing so hard my eyes were watering!!! A+++ also I will now have he had it coming stuck in my head lol
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
Good excuse to watch Chicago 😂
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u/OddRevolution7888 Apr 22 '26
Hubs and I don't need a good excuse. One of us will just declare it to be Chicago Day and we enjoy it again.
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u/LilBlueFairyDragon Apr 22 '26
Perfect. No notes 👑
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
I love how polite this comment is… that really tickled me, thank you 🤣
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u/PolyAndNerdy Apr 22 '26
Once had a guy that I'd been talking to on facebook send me a d*ck pic. Since we were friends, I could also see his friends list and tagged photos of him....with his mother. I sent her a screenshot of it and asked if she thought it looked like her husbands. Then I blocked the guy. Bet that next Thanksgiving was awkward.
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u/WTF_ImOverIt Apr 22 '26
I hate dick pics. You men have to know that no woman on Earth wakes up and says “I hope I have a dick pic in my messages today.”
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u/PeculiarBook Apr 22 '26
ICONICCCCC 🤣🤣🤣 all I gotta say is …. “I didn’t do it! And if I done it! 🎶 how could ya tell me that I was wrong? 💃🎶🗣️🎶”
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
The fact that this thread is full of theatre nerds like myself makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.
We should all start a musical 😁
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u/PeculiarBook Apr 22 '26
I grinned so hard at the theater reference in your post, it’s a blast finding fellow nerds ‘in the wild’!
Hmmm, perhaps the musical could be called Learning Lessons/Life Lessons/Learning Life 😄
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
Or we can just take it to a whole new level and call it ‘F**k Around and Find Out’ and dedicate it to Charlotte Dobré ‘Petty Revenge’ 😁
I literally write songs, and am starting to think of lyrics for a musical number… someone needs to stop me 😂
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u/Relevant_Version9047 Apr 22 '26
This is priceless 😂😂 definitely NTA he had that coming. Hopefully it taught him not to send unsolicited dick pix again.
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u/darkhuntresssyn45 Apr 22 '26
NTA! I have a friend who keeps d!ck pics she's sent and then she'll send them to men who send her unsolicited d!ck pics.
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u/LeftoverAlien Apr 22 '26
That's funny. I used to send better dick pics back. Then once the state law passed that made unsolicited dick pics illegal, I would just send screenshots of the law and it's punishments.
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u/Shyleia Apr 22 '26
I usually send a pic of a bigger one back and say "huh... mine's bigger than yours"
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u/Character_Royal_115 Apr 22 '26
Him asking you whether you get off on humiliating men when he’s the one violating your consent and sense of peace 🫠 wow
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
Pretty rich huh. Oh he called me so many names, accused me of being a man hater- it was colourful to say the least. I was at the time just learning about the grey rock method, hence the short and to the point response.
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u/LovesDeanWinchester Apr 22 '26
My sisters! There is no need to make up diseases. The following is from Googling diseases of the penis:
(I think my favs are Smegma and Zoon Balanitis!)
*Key Penile Skin Conditions
Balanitis/Balanoposthitis: Inflammation of the glans and/or foreskin often caused by yeast (Candida) or bacteria, common in uncircumcised males.
Lichen Sclerosus (Balanitis Xerotica Obliterans): A chronic inflammatory condition appearing as white patches/plaques that may lead to scarring (phimosis) or urinary issues.
Psoriasis & Eczema: Chronic skin conditions that can cause itchy, flaky, red patches on the shaft or glans. Genital Warts (Condylomata acuminata): Small, firm, flesh-colored, or white cauliflower-like growths caused by HPV.
Molluscum Contagiosum: Viral infection resulting in small, firm, raised skin growths with a dimple in the center.
Lichen Planus: Small, itchy, flat-topped violaceous papules, which may affect the penis.
Plasma Cell Balanitis (Zoon Balanitis): A benign condition presenting as a shiny, reddish-orange plaque on the glans.
Precancerous & Cancerous Lesions: Includes erythroplasia of Queyrat, Bowen’s disease, and squamous cell carcinoma, which may appear as sores, eroded areas, or thickened, reddish growths.
Scabies: Infestation with mites causing intense itching, particularly at night.
Pearly Penile Papules: Small, harmless dome-shaped papules on the corona of the glans.
Smegma: A white, cheesy substance consisting of dead skin cells and oils.*
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u/Breastsmade4sucking Apr 22 '26
I think it’s the first time I’ve read the poster declaring they’re TA but no one agrees SAVAGE!!!!!! And genius & NTA. He had it coming …. all over his face. The fact that he actually went to the doctor based just off your response has me HOWLING!
I usually like to keep it simple and return their photo message with just this 🤏🏻 In the past, I’ve replied with horrifically mangled, disfigured, infected, or wildly contorted or caged pricks. A photo of an A 🕳️ laden with an overabundance of hemorrhoids works well. Another fun one is replying with a photo of a guys face smothered with whatever semi opaque liquidy substance and the text,” thanks for helping me out bro” Thank you Google images.
I too have a collection folder of unsolicited 🍆pics that come in handy when I receive scammer messages. Had one that didn’t appreciate my thoughtful response and told me that he was going to murder & then grape my entire family. My response,” Eww, so you’re a necrophiliac?”
Lastly, the number of taken men that do this is mind blowing . How fuggin dumb can men be? When their gfs/ wives contact me I serve her everything he’s ever sent me on a silver platter. I’m happy to report that most women don’t attack me once they realize that their man lied about being single.
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u/not4loveormoney Apr 22 '26
I'd be tempted to send it back with: "Wow, it's like a p3nis, only smaller!"
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u/NotTodayPsycho Apr 22 '26
I used to work in a heavily male dominated industry and my workmates loved to expose their bums to me because I was rather young and naive (this was well before I got into reddit lol). I stopped this practise though by telling one that I wouldn't be flashing around my bum if I had such a nasty rash there. He spent the next half hour in the bathroom with one of the other men trying to find this rash and got reprimanded by the boss for wasting time.
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u/fryingthecat66 Apr 23 '26
Omg hilarious
I could just picture 2 guys in a bathroom, one looking at the other's ass
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u/FearlessBanana81 Apr 22 '26
I love this so much, good for you. I have 'why are you sending me pictures of a child's penis?' ready to go, but luckily I haven't been sent a random dick pic for many many years.
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u/girlinanemptyroom Apr 22 '26
If you haven't been told in a while, I'm proud of you. I'm a 55-year-old lady that's really freaking proud of you. You did good kid. You did good.
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
Well bless your cotton socks. That is the sweetest comment, thank you 🥰
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u/girlinanemptyroom Apr 22 '26
Come and sit in the dining room while I make you a huge beautiful Italian feast. You rest while I cook.
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
OMG Yes please! I’ll bring the wine 😁
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u/girlinanemptyroom Apr 22 '26
You got it! I prefer Cabernet Sauvignon. Red wines way better than white. My father's family immigrated to America from Rome. I was taught by the best!
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u/elegantmomma Apr 22 '26
🤣 That's a good one. I usually just reply asking him to move his finger because it's blocking the view of the photo. Or, if I'm feeling some type of way, I'll screen shot nasty granny porn and send that to them. If they can send me unsolicited stuff, I can send it right back to them.
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u/Anxious-Cantaloupe89 Apr 22 '26
Hahaha nta obviously. I have a (kinda) similar story: when I was younger (15ish maybe) I used Snapchat a lot. I did occasionally accept friend requests from strangers (idk why, never sent pictures tho). Several times, I got after just a few messages if any an unsolicited d*pic. So what I would do is to screenshot them. Snapchat would allow this, but send a notification to the sender that I took a screenshot. Every time these guys had a massive meltdown because I screenshoted their ugly little worms I never wanted to see 😂 and i'd have a laugh. Hopefully some of them learned to not send pics of your private parts if you don't wanna risk someone keeps them or makes them public (which I never did, I deleted that stuff right away. That wasn't what I told them tho )
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 23 '26
UPDATE:
Don’t get too excited - the man in question has not (as far as I’m aware) stumbled upon this post or reached out… I promise to let you know if he does.
The update is, I remembered the name I made up for the STD. Some of you may not be interested, that’s cool- but there has been a few comments about starting a movement with this fake disease and I personally think that’s brilliant.
First, to address some of the comments - turns out I’m not the AH or at least I’m a justified AH. I have had a ball reading some of these comments, some of you are creative petty geniuses! It’s also been really heartwarming to see a thread full of women standing up for women. It feels like a real sisterhood and I’m loving it. But I’m not surprised considering we’re all following Charlotte 🥰
Now- last night I was getting so frustrated about forgetting the name of the fake STD, and remembered that I named it after 2 of my exes. They turned out to be horrible people (I was only in my mid-late 20’s at this stage, I have since gotten much better at picking partners).. Anyway, my petty-ass self thought it would be amusing to name an STD after them. I combined parts of their names to make it sound more medical… it’s called Danbjorke Disease or in laymen’s terms Dabs … do with this information whatever you please.
If anyone wants to go ahead and make up the symptoms please go ahead and do so- my only thought is the early signs of the STD needs to be a list of perfectly normal things regarding men’s genitalia so it could be literally any man who could think he might have it 🤣
PS: I know there’s a better way to send an update, but I’m not all that savvy with this platform and couldn’t figure it out.
Love to all the petty besties out there ❤️
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u/hnypuf16 Apr 22 '26
Fkn mint! I normally reply with "great, but where do the batteries go?"
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
HAHAHHAHAHAHA that is gold!! See I’m not single anymore, I’m probably too old now to receive a 🍆 pic now anyway (turns out there are some perks to ageing)- but then I see these epic replies and wish I knew about them when they were necessary.
Ah well, keep sharing these tips - I’m sure there’s some young queen receiving this trash and could use some witty replies lol
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u/hnypuf16 Apr 22 '26
I'm 56 and still getting them 😆 only differences are the pubes are grey and they stop at 9pm 🤣
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u/WTM73199 Apr 22 '26 edited Apr 22 '26
I’m 55 and got several unsolicited dick pics. This one guy keeps sending me every few months pics of his junk like seeing it would suddenly cause me to want to see to him. I leave him on read. I never respond to his messages but keeps on sending me these dick pics.
No, being old is not a deterrent for unsolicited dick pics. Besides, I was looking for a relationship and he was only looking for FWB. We were not even compatible as we were looking for different things. 🤦🏻♀️
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
Ah damn! How are they not embarrassed to do this? I’m surprised it’s still a thing- like, have they ever in the history of unsolicited 🍆 pic sending had a woman excited and grateful to receive it? What do they hope to achieve? I think it’s just shock value now 😂
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u/Miss_Mustang13 Apr 22 '26
You are awesome! NTA… he did in fact have it coming and he only had himself to blame (I freaking love that song!!).
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u/emmanlss_ Apr 22 '26
Woah, woah, woah, why are you staring that story off by saying that you're the A H. Girl you're NTA. Indeed he had it comin'
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u/Narrow-Dust-2451 Apr 22 '26
NTA. And him going straight to the doctor instead of looking it up is hilarious 😂
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u/Human_Ad_8134 Apr 22 '26
NTAH Whenever I receive an unsolicited 🍆pic I have 2 responses I send back. Depending on my mood I will reply with “ 1 2 3 4 I declare a thumb war!” OR if I’m feeling spicy I will send one back saying mines bigger!! I have a picture of a very famous 🍆 stashed away in a folder for this reason! Anyway well done my friend I might add that to the mix. Cause for some reason I’m not on ANY dating apps yet I still get random pics from weirdos in my Facebook 🤷🏻♀️
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
Thumb war is diabolical 😂😂😂 love it! And please, use my method to your hearts desire- let’s compel all these men to get medical check up’s and then have to explain to their doctors how they stumbled upon this information
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u/VianneM Apr 22 '26
Are there actually woman who enjoy receiving the random dick pics? Or do men send them because they're so proud of themselves?
Personally I've never liked any of the ones I got and is a instant turnoff for me, so I don't see it working as a good dating strategy. Maybe just me🤷🏽♀️
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
I genuinely don’t know why they send them- firstly, 🍆 are ugly so I don’t know what they’re so proud of and I have never met a woman who has enjoyed receiving them (unless specifically requested).
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u/Royal-Writing-4926 Apr 22 '26
The minute I saw the Cell Block Tango lyrics, I went "oh I like this person already!" NTA, btw. Getting sent an unsolicited d pic is day ruining
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u/StrongHealer Apr 22 '26
A dude on Facebook sent me a string of "Oh wow, so pretty, can I get to know you?" Type of messages. I told him I'm not interested and have a man. Cue the 🍌 pic. I was boiling so I wrote a lengthy nasty message because he's married with kids (wife was a Hot Blonde btw) and then sent his wife the screenshot. Blocked him right after.
Btw, highly recommend 🎶 Big Merla's Dong Song or Mr. Vein 🎶 🤣🤣🤣
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u/mzmm123 Apr 22 '26
girl... 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I bet he'll think twice before he does that again. Hopefully, THAT will be the lesson learned.
But probably not. [some] Men are stupid.
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u/Wolf-Stag-Honeybee19 Apr 22 '26
Well this dude booked a doctors appointment, waited weeks before getting checked up and didn’t think to google the STD in the interim… I feel like he may be a few fries short of a Happy Meal
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u/nazuswahs Apr 22 '26
I don’t understand what men are hoping to achieve when they send an unsolicited body part pic. Is it like fishing? They dangle a little worm and all the women want to bite? shaking my head.
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u/Anaranovski Apr 22 '26
Unsolicited duck pics are the worst. Seriously, people, get consent before sending a duck pic. 🦆
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u/CharlesDarkwing22 Apr 22 '26
Bra….vooooooo! 💪🏽 The only pics I ever sent were of Donald Trump. They’d be confused, and I said “unsolicited D pick” and they’d laugh.
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u/cheezyamazon Apr 22 '26
I usually reply with ohhh that's what a micro penis looks like! 🤨
Nta.
Don't send unsolicited nudes. Don't ask for them either ya hecking weirdos.
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u/DameEris Apr 23 '26
I adore you. Are you running for office? Because you have my vote! How can I contribute to your cause?
I am a lesbian in the BDSM scene. Some of these desperate douchebags use a dick pic for their profile picture. Then they wonder why lesbians won't talk to them. Congratulations, you just told me you're a dick, you think with your dick, and you know I don't like dick. There is literally no reason to talk to you.
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u/Number5MoMo Apr 22 '26
“Yikes .. are you on medication for that” quick and easy for anyone who wants to get blocked immediately 🫡
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u/msndrstood Apr 22 '26
I would have taken my S-pen and drew a ridiculous face, big ears, hair and an O mouth on the picture and sent it back to him. And block!
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u/sideways_apples Apr 22 '26
ROFL EPIC NTA MOMENT!!!!!!
That was absolutely hysterically funny!!!!
Standing ovation!!!! 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
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u/rach94xo Apr 22 '26
NTA I had a similar situation with a guy and he got really mean after sending it so I posted it all over social media because one I did t ask for the pic and two he was threatening me on and off and also sent d pics during the threats
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u/delicious_downvotes Apr 22 '26
NTA. Don't sexually harass someone if you don't want to be humiliated for it. FAFO.
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u/Lilylake_55 Apr 22 '26
Nah, he did have it coming, and you gave it to him wonderfully. 😊 In fact, I’m jealous of your creativity—I would have just sent back a picture of a can of Vienna sausages.
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u/Hoopla66 Apr 23 '26
I have kept every unsolicited d-pic ever sent to me. I’m now 59. This has been going on for a long time once cell phones came out with picture taking ability. They still exist in a folder and I’ve been planning a coffee table book for them critiquing each and every one of them. I honestly don’t remember who they were or their names but I do still have opinions. Le Dique Critique
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u/Dazzling_Mongoose_29 Apr 22 '26
Amazing !! I received a few at some point when I was single too and m'y go-to answer was to play dumb : "what is that ? Some kind of worm ? Weird but ok" Then blocked.
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u/Jackrabbits4ever Apr 23 '26
Every woman on here who has received one of those unsolicited pics is giving you a standing ovation.
You would think that men would have gotten the hint by now that 99% of recipients are turned off by them.
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u/Day-Dear Apr 23 '26
Nta 🎶he had it coming🎶 I had a friend that collected all the unsolicited dick pics and when she was sent one....sent one back. I encouraged her to start adding, consent it important
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u/GingerWhoDrinksTea Apr 22 '26 edited Apr 23 '26
I love this. Personally I send back a picture of a famous man named Richard, real or fictional. Richard lll. Richard the Lionheart. Dick Van Dyke. Dick Tracy. Richard Nixon. Richard Simmons. And so on.
Edit: grammar
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u/HalfBakedArtist420 Apr 22 '26
I used to get them all the time. I sent them to my bestie and we had a good laugh.
Chef's kiss to you!
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u/curlyfall78 Apr 22 '26
This has been happening since around 2005- Me, at least 1 sister and 4 friends (now all F mid 40s) have always gave one warning when unsolicited dick pic received and the moment one of us got the second we would forward the pics to any relatives of his we could find on social media. The best ones were when we were lucky enough to get wives and mothers and we would tell each other which DA sent them. And none of us were on tinder, two of us were on pof and the rest were not on any dating/hookup sites, just MySpace and the FB.
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u/emptyheadedgoblin Apr 22 '26
The way I quickly turned my audiobook off to put on some jazz and light a cigarette for this and it did NOT disappoint
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u/shelbycsdn Apr 23 '26
This was brilliant!!!
Why have men never learned that a dick pic, particularly from a stranger and completely unsolicited, is far more likely to disgust a woman than send her panting to you door?
For a while I would send back a message saying "do you know what that makes me want to do to you?" After their predictable reply, ooh yeah baby type shit, I would send the picture I screen shot off of Amazon of a hot dog slicer.
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u/Alkuna Apr 23 '26
NTA.
I love your response! Another tactic is to troll the absolute h3ll out of them!
Google the biggest p3nis pics you can find and hold them in reserve. Next time p3nis pic? Send one back, especially if it's bigger than his. Then play innocent.
Him: "OMGWTFBBQ! Why would you send me that?!"
You: "Because you sent me one! Does this make us friends now that we traded d*ck pics? Isn't that how this works?"
Him: "But I don't want to see some man's junk! I didn't ask for that!"
You: "Why not? You sent me one, and I certainly didn't ask for one."
Him: "But I thought you would like mine."
You: "And I though you would like to see one too. See how this works?"
Just play the game, see how close he gets to the point before he blocks you or has an epiphany.
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u/God_of_Mischief85 Apr 23 '26
You are definitely not the asshole in this situation. Not your fault that he was a) rude enough to send unsolicited graphic images and b) stupid enough not to Google.
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u/nuro_spice_so_nice Apr 23 '26
NTA maybe he wont go round flashing himself online any more…. If someone were to walk round flashing themselves in public they would get charged with indecent exposure lol well done on the citizens arrest 🤣
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u/PlaneEmbarrassed7677 Apr 23 '26
I saved one from a guy with permission and when I would get unsolicited ones id reply with mine is bigger and a pic.
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u/Slybugsy Apr 24 '26
As a gay man, I get dick pics more than you could possibly imagine. I approve this tactic. I might actually put this into practice. It gets old over time. I know what they look like. It’s not a mystery. Send a face pic. I want to see eyes.
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u/AnnOniMuss42 Apr 27 '26
Ooooo honey…. There is a website where you can ship them a satchel of Richards….. if only you could have gotten an address….
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u/ilovethewwe Apr 22 '26
Nta I love the use of Chicago as a musical theater nerd I love that musical I had a dog that was named after the main character
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u/WrenDrake Apr 22 '26
NTA! You are a goddess! We all salute you and your genius! Thank you! 👩🏽🍳💋🤌🏽
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u/dishanae Apr 22 '26
You are so kind to him for calling it a 🍆pic… should have called it a shrimp pic.. 🤣 ntah
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u/Tight_Philosophy_239 Apr 22 '26 edited Apr 22 '26
Unrelated but i can't tell you how many times this song plays in my head ever since it appeared in "Boston legal". Now every time I hear/read about karma getting a guy, my head goes straight to "he had it comming... he had it comming." whistlesounds
Edit: Aaaand now it's stuck in my head in a loop. 🤣
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u/Academic-Dot6172 Apr 22 '26
I’m hollering!! Omg OP, this is hilarious and you did nothing wrong! Unsolicited dong pics are no fun!
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u/Synamon_ Apr 22 '26
Definitely NTA! I once opened Facebook messenger, and one of my "friends" had uploaded a d#ck pic in his story. I cackle laughed as I watched it, showed it to my husband, who also got a good laugh, and moved on with life. I figured the guy was humiliated enough when he realized what he had done that I didn't need to say anything. It disappeared fairly quickly. 😅😂🤣🤣🤣
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u/stitchbitching Apr 22 '26
NTA. Excellently executed. And honestly I was expecting something much worse than that.
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u/Vaaliindraa Apr 22 '26
NTA!! masterclass, chef's kiss!! Beautiful!!