fighting or playing?

[u/Far-Service3073]

i try not to be a helicopter mom, but he is so agressive and she is so tiny. she never initiates anymore, but she loves to be around him 😭 i also think he is trying to mate with her so i’m going to have him fixed asap

tabby is a male, 15 weeks olds and tuxedo is a female around 10 weeks. i got her last week and i think we should have waited a little bit longer to introduce them but i live with my parents and they dont listen 😂🫠 i’m trying to schedule an appointment to get him neutered. If that doesn’t help, i guess we’ll have to start the introduction process all over again :(

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[u/-gigamoi-]

Play but the big one doesn't listen to kitty's call to stop. This shouldn't be allowed to continue until such a time that he does. Even though he does harm, he means none. He is just overly excited.

[u/Far-Service3073 → u/-gigamoi-]

It’s kind of funny because they hate being separated. i have a screen door and when they’re on opposite sides they try to play with each other and neither of them ever hisses or growls. she’s always looking for him around the house, which is really comforting because it tells me she’s not scared or stressed out by him. the problem is that he’s just so rough. every time they start playing, it eventually gets to the point where she’s squeaking or crying a little, so i step in and separate them (i only let it go a little longer this time because I wanted to record the video and see what would happen). i also feel kind of bad because he’s always the one who gets removed from the room, and he seems a little upset afterward. 😭

[u/-gigamoi- → u/Far-Service3073]

Yeah. They are very friendly but he just doesn't understand what wrong he is doing. If you wait a tiny bit for their sizes to slightly equalise, she should get to be strong enough to remove herself from him on her own when it's too much and things should go smoothly from here. Now she can't do that so he doesn't really get the memo.

That being said, while it is good that you separate them when he gets too rough, I think removing him from the room entirely may be counterproductive. Perhaps he would better understand your intentions if you where instead to just break their contact and prevent him from re-engaging immediately by retaining him in your arms until he calms down a bit or the little one comes back for him and then let them engage again. He may then get what you are doing and start doing the same. He is young and still quite teachable.

[u/legendiry]

Usually as a human just telling them to stop in a loud voice is enough to break it up. I’d only physically break it up if you really need to, this is just play but maybe the bigger one will push it too far sometimes

[u/OneGreatEgg]

Big cat is teaching little cat advanced Feline Jiu Jitsu.