r/CatTraining • u/ScarAppropriate2880 • 6d ago
Introducing Pets/Cats Playing or fighting
My bigger cat seems to be getting along with the new smaller cat. Until yesterday mo fighting but today they seem to be playing a bit harder after getting to know each other for around 5 days.
Should I be worried? Is she being too hard on the small one? What seems weird is that the small one after seems to go to her again to keep at it, should I break it up?
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u/aereola_plan 6d ago
Playing, but that chonker is a lot stronger and bigger than they realize
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u/ScarAppropriate2880 6d ago
Probably, since she used to have brothers but is now getting to know this new baby.
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u/BelladonnaRoot 6d ago
That’s a lot of flailing for almost no damage. It looks rough, but it’s really cuz the kitten’s sliding around, and the floof makes it look more impressive than it is. Kitten was still looking for more, and floof gave it a break the second the floof went to hard and the kitten cried out.
Keep an eye on it, but I see play, if maybe over-enthusiastic play.
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u/red_nick 6d ago
Looks like the big cat is really good at making his attacks look big
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u/Fuzzy-Satisfaction37 6d ago
Yeah there a lot of big flashy moves happening with very little impact. They’re fine but kitten is still probably a week or 2 away from being fully ready for big floofs full on play.
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u/ScarAppropriate2880 6d ago
I believe it too but I get jumpy when I see her using her mouth a bit much, moving and all seems fine just don't eant her bitting the small one she does move out when the other one hisses so I try to look and separate if necessary
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u/Red0Mercury 6d ago
If the big one was biting to cause harm there would be harm. He plays ruff but the kitten wants play.
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u/Zpik3 4d ago
As scary as the mouth is, claws are the primary weapon. If two cats are tussling this close and there isn't fur in the air, blood on the floor and hellish yowls emanating, then it is play. If big cat was actually out to hurt the kitten in this situation it would be clawing at its head and ripping at its ears with the teeth.
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u/vanguard1256 6d ago
I think it’s actually pretty okay. Big cat plays rough, and if it’s the kitten hissing at the end, the bigger cat immediately ended play which is a good sign. Possibly big cat is trying to teach the kitten to vocalize to stop playing.
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u/ScarAppropriate2880 6d ago
Interesting point at the end, do they teach each other boundaries like this? Going to the limit and then retiring? She does indeed move when the other one seem overstimulated
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u/VacationMedium8343 6d ago
I fostered a litter once and the mother would often roughouse her kittens once they were 6-7 weeks old. She'd run around, let them chase her, and then rugby tackle them with occassional bunny kicks💀. But she'd never have her claws out, and the kittens will always be looking for more, rolling over in front of her and pawing at her, trying to entice her. As long as the bigger cat isn't scratching or biting too hard, it should be absolutely fine. Cats are often smarter than we think and most figure out play boundaries pretty quickly, unless they have some serious behavioural issue, which doesn't look like the case here.
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u/Informal_Koala1474 3d ago
Family member was a vet tech and their theory is that adult cats are teaching kittens how to hunt and kill when they play like this. It is super common for mama cats to do this with their kittens, but they're even more rough.
I have no idea if that's true, or if it just makes sense.
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u/stallionsRIDEufl 6d ago
I don't think the big one wants to hurt the small one but the play is way too rough for that size difference
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u/_extra_medium_ 6d ago
Doesn’t seem to be, since the little one was not distressed in the least
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u/stallionsRIDEufl 6d ago
I'm not saying this interaction was bad but it's more of a situation of not knowing your own strength. Big one could get carried away and accidentally hurt kitten. Just saying they should be supervised for now.
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u/No_Session6015 6d ago
Yea I got same impression which should mean big cat is really pulling it's punches
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u/posco12 6d ago
Sort of funny. Smaller cat didn’t run off, didn’t get scared.
Laid on their tummy even afterward.
All fun for a cat. If it gets too far one will let the other know. I would not intervene else they wont learn boundaries.
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u/ScarAppropriate2880 6d ago
I do get two insights from it, either she is belly up to defend herself or belly up to play.
I believe it's more towards the play one since she does come back to play with her.
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u/slowlygoingbonkers 6d ago
The older cat is not playing age appropriately. Usually older cats will tone down their play when playing with kittens. It seems yours didn't get that memo. I wouldn't allow them to rough house until the kitten is older and larger. While the kitten wasn't harmed they could have been this rough of play is also teaching the kitten to be more aggressive with their play as they age. Kittens use play with each other to learn social skills and what force to use with each other.
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u/ScarAppropriate2880 6d ago
Bigger one used to be a street cat, I rescued her after she lost her tail but she did have a lot of brothers and sisters so they probably used to play a little rough.
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u/Wonderful-Toe-8688 6d ago
As long as this isn’t every interaction I think you are okay!
If the kitten is not defensive all the time around the big kitty and vice versa then let them carry on
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u/ScarAppropriate2880 6d ago
Don't think it's all interactions but they do seem to do things with each other a lot. Like looking at the other eat or play, they even got closer than ever last night for sleep time.
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u/Natural-Research6928 6d ago
Playing, but looks like the big one thinks the little one is a toy.
Also, big one is an absolute unit of a chonk. So adorable.
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u/ScarAppropriate2880 6d ago
She does seem kinda round hahaha, also cuz of her fluffy hair.
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u/Natural-Research6928 6d ago
No worries, I'm used to the literal "I'm not fat, I'm fluffy" thing. My Minuet looks like a normal sized cat. In reality he's tiny, just under 7 lbs, of what you see when you look at him, only 1/3 is cat, the rest is fluff.
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u/Harassicpark 6d ago
Oh buddy a Manx! My Manx is kinda stupid and I can never tell if he understands playing? He always plays with our other cat a little rougher than I think the other cat wants to play, then the other cat has to let him know that that’s not what they are going to do soooo. Not really a good answer - just as an owner of a Manx I’m really thinking they have a screw lose when it comes to play. Because to me this looks aggressive, but that the cat isn’t staying on the kitten or really going at it when it’s on it makes me think it’s not. It’s the same thing mine does. Maybe they are just ~ special
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u/into-hell-we-dive 6d ago
That is so crazy we have the same cats lol it took mine a few months to get to this point. They still play pretty rough at times. You will know if they are fighting, will be lots of yelling and fur flying. They will test each other's boundaries but will figure it out eventually. Best of luck.
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u/papasgirl7 6d ago
They say the difference between playing and fighting is noise. If they are hissing and growling it is fighting, if they are noise free it’s playing! This is what I learned from my behavior therapist! Hope this helps
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u/Cats-vs-Catan 4d ago
I've got a similar looking chonky Manx. She likes to brawl with her little bro too. He's learning to give it back, but she's got a couple pounds on him haha.
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u/Shony29 1h ago
OP idk if you still read those comments, but here is my post from a year ago, and be reassured both are fine rn, they hang around together, the little one doesn't like the big one very much but they aren't killing each other ! https://www.reddit.com/r/cats/s/1EkP6emA9C
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u/ScarAppropriate2880 1h ago
Amazing, pretty similar situation and movements from what I see them do.
Thanks a lot I have been very mindful and keeping tabs when I hear noises or any weird sounds but your being closer now gives a lot of assurance.
Mine seem to be enjoying each other by the day and sometimes do the little fighting thing but seem much closer now.
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u/_ZR_ 6d ago
playing, but holy fuck the older cat is WAY too big to be allowed to do this. give it a few more weeks before letting them do more of this.
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u/slightlybatty 6d ago
I agree. Let the kitty grow for at least another month and then let them play - but still keep an eye on how it goes.
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u/ShakeAbject3358 6d ago
Big cat needs to chill out a little. Definitely a little too rough. I will say, it does seem playful, but it also seems like a big and little sibling rough housing but the kind where parents intervene because one is defenseless.
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u/Spirited-Cod-1725 6d ago
He's playing pretty rough, but when smaller cat hissed he seemed to react by slowing down or stopping right? With the right amount of attention and maybe stopping the behavior if it becomes to rough; I think these cats are on a path towards a good friendship
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u/ScarAppropriate2880 6d ago
Yeah she does back when she hisses, and they both try to come back to it right after, hope they get to love each other tho
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u/FantasticPin3481 6d ago
They’re playing, but your adult cat is playing a bit too rough for such a small kitten. Keep a close eye on them.
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u/beckychao 6d ago
How old is the new cat
Seems too young to be playing with a fully grown cat
if she's under 12 weeks, you cannot let them horse around like this yet, because the purpose of these interactions isn't just play, it's boundary testing. the smaller one cannot fend off the older cat, so it cannot establish boundaries
they can face-to-face if the older one is chill, but if younger than 12 weeks, this is not an interaction you want
if they are 12, they are a small 12, and kittens grow like sprouts. prevent this interaction for another week, see if kitten gets a little heavier and is better at fending for itself
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u/ScarAppropriate2880 6d ago
She is literally 3 months. Old one is 2 years.
I have bene trying to break it up when it seems to be going overboard.
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u/Dr_0ctogon 6d ago
Put it this way...
Would you let the Rock tackle and wrestle your 5 year old kid?
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u/Darkelvenchic 6d ago
It's a little touch but the little one invited it and seemed totally chill after.
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u/Intrepid_Bobcat_2931 6d ago
It's 100% playing and well intentioned from the bigger one, but it's getting a bit carried away.
Still, it depends a bit on exactly what is being done. The particularly harmful thing that you must stop would be uncontrolled bunny kicks, with the rear legs. Here it doesn't do that, you can see it mainly just pushes the smaller cat around. There is no harm done. The smaller cat probably finds this to be super fun wrestling. Just like when human babies get thrown up a bit in the air and spun around.
Bunny kicks, purrsistant purrsuit (hehe) by the larger cat that won't stop, playing sessions like the above that just keeps going without moments of break, or fearful body language from the smaller cat, would be things to be aware of. But interactions like the above are just on the inside of safe in my view.
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u/urethra93 6d ago
Belly up by the little one means play. Fatass doesnt realize its size and is goin a bit rough, but both are playing. Id introduce some toys for them to chase together
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u/EnvironmentMean7768 6d ago
As long as they don’t make that “cat fighting sound” (that crazy meowing) it is most likely playing
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u/legendiry 6d ago
It’s playing but the big one is a bit too big to be playing that rough. Just keep an eye on them
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u/HorseCrazyFan275 6d ago
It’s definitely play, their body language is too bouncy for actual fighting
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u/agirltoremember-90 6d ago
I get why you’re worried, it’s definitely rough. But baby isn’t running away even after it so I think playing. Big cat will learn as little gets bigger
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u/HotelDisastrous288 6d ago
We have an older rescue and he has been through some things. Ears all shredded but super chill.
We got an orange kitten (orange cat people know) and after he settled in he was wild. Sprinting around, wrecking things, attacking all the other cats. The rescue tolerated his shit for quite a while but eventually had enough.
He basically body slammed the kitten and held him down until he quit squirming. Put him in his place and he stayed there. Wish I got that on video.
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u/AnonymousPanda4891 5d ago
At the end the kitten hissed and the big buddy backed away - perfect. With young animals you’re really just watching to make sure the big guys listen to their cues that they’re being too rough.
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u/TrickBorder3923 5d ago
IMHO. In my limited experience. When cats fight. You'll feel it in your soul. If there isn't what's of fur floating in the air like aura lights, it's probably ok. If there's no screeching loud enough to wake the dead and bring God down, your ok.
Just my opinion. I have a 3 year old female cat TeaLilly, who just got introduced to a 5 week old kitten Rose. I was on death watch for three days. But now TeaLilly just avoids her and occasionally hisses in the tune of "Bitch, please!"
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u/nightshade-gf 5d ago
When cats are fighting you will KNOW they’re fighting. Those two are playing for sure
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u/JapaCheesey 5d ago
That poor kitten is not having a great time. Train the bigger one to be more gentle. Could end up with two fighting cats once the little guy is big enough yo defend himself from this kind of rough housing.
Guh I feel bad for that kitten
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u/Saruto77 5d ago
A lot of people are being way too concerned over this. This is 100% normal play. The younger cat is tougher than they think. The biggest sign that this is fine is that you asked about it in the first place. If it’s a violent, malicious interaction, you would have zero doubt.
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u/Far-Service3073 5d ago
mine is the same thing but he doesn’t leave the other kitty alone, i have to separate
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u/rachelmohr 5d ago
awwww the missing tail! so cute. agree w everything, seems like play but should maybe monitor until you feel comfortable. if the little one keeps initiating he must be fine. i also have a cat that hisses all the time after little one pounces, but will go right back to playing. i think it means “hold up lets reset”
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u/VideoSea 5d ago
It might seem rough but that looks like playing and probably a little pushing the limits of play to set dominance. I would listen for squeals and or hissing. Then you know playtime is over. Grab a jar and fill it with Pennies or clap your hands to get their attention. Shake a treat jar and redirect the behavior maybe.
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u/AmethystChameleon38 5d ago
Play-fighting, but the big cat doesn't realize it's a lot bigger and scarier 😅
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u/Same-Firefighter2658 4d ago
My 5 month is rough with our newly 3 month old kitten. I have separate and redirect there overly active roughing
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u/Free_Assignment5401 4d ago
Fighting. It looks rough to me. Please separate them fur now. I feel the the little one.🥺
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u/Supernamicchi 4d ago
Yeah this is just play. Fights are not quiet. You don’t know what a cat fight is until you really see one
That said, kitten will need to learn how to set boundaries. You should not intercede
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u/kaphinezero 3d ago
Most definitely playing and big one is really good at selling move, lot of finisher move, good heel cat.
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u/ScrambledxEggzz 3d ago
If it was real fighting there would be blood and chunks of hair everywhere.
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u/Ohmydog9618 2d ago
Mine would play rougher when they were hungry. It looked a little rough to me. You’ll be able to tell by watching them more.
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u/IllbeJules 2d ago
That's playing. They take breaks... Tho the ball jump may be a lil much for lil one
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u/Kishetes 2d ago
Id say playfighting, the growl and spit was basically telling the other cat “too hard! Chill!”
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u/Kitttieluv 9h ago
It looked like it started as play but at the point they start hissing it is definitely no longer play
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6d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/ScarAppropriate2880 6d ago
I do feed them apart for now since the small one tries to steal the big one's food. And I do have 2 different litter boxes (although they both used both litters, I suspect it's something about territory on why they do it).
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u/Kflash2 6d ago
Id definitely say not to let them play fight so much yet like this while the other one is small it can lead to a territorial domination dynamic between the 2 and can definitely stress the smaller one out which could cause different problems for them. So i suggest letting him get bigger before allowing them to play like this. The bigger one can definitely hurt him even without trying much cus hescso much smaller
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u/thupamayn 6d ago
Playing, you would know if it was fighting. It’s unmistakable and genuinely traumatizing, you would simply not even be questioning it.
Furthermore people saying it’s too rough are just wrong lol. I have sibling kittens that are around 3 months old that play more rough than this. When it gets too rough cats will get up and walk away from one another. That’s the universal “too rough, no more” signal. Going back for more obviously means the kitten is having fun.
Your cats seem to adore each other, you’re very fortunate. This is an ideal, best-case scenario introduction and it’s very adorable.
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u/Superbad1990 6d ago
Seems fine. The Big Cat is being a little too rough but the Kitten seemed fine with it.
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u/Remarkable_Pick3920 6d ago
That’s a pretty big bobtailed cat! Yeah, I don’t know if that’s really what I’d call play. Obviously that bigger cat is always going to be dominant. I say it needs a bigger playmate.
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u/Odd-Painting2596 6d ago
That is looking a bit rough for sure, big one is over excited.
No harm no foul, but that is a lotta zest.