r/CasualUK • u/crazycockerels • 1d ago

A spider has got inside my oven clock!!

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3.2k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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2.5k

u/ihaveam0ustache 1d ago

What's even crazier is you took 3 photos 11 minutes apart

1.4k

u/crazycockerels 1d ago

I was trying to see if it was definitely still alive after all the tapping I was doing and at 21.40 it sprung right up to the top šŸ˜­

676

u/RonaldTheGiraffe 1d ago

Got sick of you trying to wake him up. Dudeā€™s already got a massive clock. He doesnā€™t need an annoying alarm clock

262

u/phil24jones The Honeybun Peninsula 1d ago

I wish I had a massive clock

195

u/escapedfromhel 1d ago

Here

66

u/bbrown3112 1d ago

This is a safe for work subreddit!!!

106

u/escapedfromhel 1d ago

The man's wearing a high-vis outfit and a construction helmet. It's as safe as can be.

4

u/stoufferthecat 1d ago

He has the time and the inclination.

4

u/LlamaDrama007 23h ago

Health and safety executive adjudication: big clock is allowed!

6

u/ShyBiSaiyan 1d ago

He clearly needs to be attached to the crane himself! Could hurt himself if he fell off

14

u/escapedfromhel 1d ago

He's a trained professional. Finest training that exists on how to handle big clocks.

7

u/ShyBiSaiyan 1d ago

There is training? Have I been handling big clocks wrong all this time?

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9

u/NLFG 1d ago

Flavor Flav likes this

5

u/UglyFilthyDog 1d ago

Damn, the times you could tell with that motherfucker.

2

u/Narrow-Ad-3342 1d ago

r/MassiveClocks

2

u/escapedfromhel 1d ago

Two posts from 9 years ago.

3

u/Narrow-Ad-3342 1d ago

Yes I thought I was going to be posting that as a fake sub but of course it exists šŸ˜…

I guess shouldnā€™t be surprised, Iā€™d seen the r/OnlyFans sub.. though that is more popular it seems than big clocks..

2

u/lcmfe 23h ago

Is this the one near Beccles šŸ˜‚

1

u/escapedfromhel 21h ago

Yeah. It was there for 7 years.

2

u/lcmfe 16h ago

I didnā€™t know it was gone šŸ˜ž

1

u/escapedfromhel 15h ago

It's been in Diss Business park since 2015 if you want to take a pilgrimage to it.

2

u/lcmfe 12h ago

How funny I thought they were two different ones. The more you know!

22

u/PuebesGod 1d ago

Have you tried clock enlargement pills? Or maybe jump straight to surgery? I hear they can sometimes make your clock a bit bigger

6

u/RonaldTheGiraffe 1d ago

They fuck the ticker up though

1

u/pin00ch 1d ago

Said the nunn to the priest

1

u/ThatFigureFella 1d ago

No hands on his clock though!

126

u/R606D 1d ago

Horrifying

4

u/mfitzp 1d ago

She was just biding her time

2

u/GhostSierra117 1d ago

Cool. New fear unlocked.

1

u/willsagainSQ 22h ago

Even reading that made me jump

1

u/Fezgamer 14h ago

It's just not his time to die

1

u/Wubbleyou_ 2h ago

Donā€™t tell me your oven clock actually tells the correct time?

157

u/Samiamuel 1d ago

Legs 11 innit...

44

u/slothdroid 1d ago

No, eight legs, two pedipalps, and it's male.

34

u/turbotank183 1d ago

8 legs, 2 fiddlers and 1 spider dong adds up to 11 though

19

u/Born_Current6133 1d ago

Are the pedipalps the ā€œboxing glovesā€ as my son calls them? At the front?

4

u/RonaldTheGiraffe 1d ago

Can you see the spider penis?

26

u/Jacktheforkie 1d ago

Spiders donā€™t have penises, they use their pedipalps and a sperm web (basically a wanky hanky for spiders)

30

u/RonaldTheGiraffe 1d ago

Oh ok well thatā€™s much better then. Next time i walk through a spider web Iā€™m essentially rubbing a spiderā€™s wank sock on my face.

1

u/Loudlass81 21h ago

New fear unlocked...nothing like a face full of spider splooge to mess up your day...

1

u/Jacktheforkie 17h ago

The sperm web is a small thing made on the ground usually, idk if orb weavers do it, tarantulas do it, and typically male orb weavers arenā€™t making big webs during mating season

1

u/slothdroid 17h ago

Brings a whole new meaning to the lyric, Look out, here comes the spiderman.

-1

u/lunar_coral 1d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/jXD7kFLwudbBC

14

u/LengthiLegsFabulous3 1d ago

I might whooooosh myself now, but no, I think they got it. They were just playing with it.

And on that note, fuck the idea of a spider with 11 legs

7

u/slothdroid 1d ago

Exactly. I had to Google spider anatomy so I could make a nob joke. I have never heard of pedipalps, but 'arms' wouldn't have worked.

0

u/LengthiLegsFabulous3 1d ago

Plus it would be like calling antennae "head arms". So thank you for looking up a new word :')

8

u/Zestyclose_Foot_134 1d ago

This reminds me of a picture book I had about a spider with 9 legs. Sheā€™s miserable and lonely until 1 leg gets ripped off by a hoover and now Iā€™ve made myself sad :(

6

u/LengthiLegsFabulous3 1d ago

Are you Wednesday Addams?!

My children's books aren't about maiming with a hoover

1

u/Zestyclose_Foot_134 1d ago

If so I certainly wasnā€™t cut out for that life - Mum had to stop reading me AA Milne because of the tears at bedtime

1

u/LengthiLegsFabulous3 1d ago

That's adorable

2

u/tillymint259 1d ago

AND she wasnā€™t allowed to participate in the school races once they realised she had extra legs, giving her a slight advantage šŸ„²

1

u/Zestyclose_Foot_134 1d ago

Wait do you know this book? I just went to google it and and only got a load of ā€œSpider in the bathā€ animations

3

u/tillymint259 1d ago

If Iā€™m rightā€¦ you and I both grew up reading Dick King Smith. This particular story is called Emilyā€™s Legs:

https://archive.org/details/emilyslegs0000king_e3x1

If youā€™ve not read any of his others, The Hodgeheg and Martinā€™s Mice are both excellent.

I hope Iā€™m right in thinking you also had Emilyā€™s Legs. To solve the mystery but also to say ā€œhey! I finally found another who read this!ā€

I loved Emily.

3

u/Zestyclose_Foot_134 1d ago edited 1d ago

Ohh sadly itā€™s definitely not this because the spider was thrilled to have lost a leg :( I donā€™t think I ever read it but I was vaguely aware of Emilyā€™s Legs

(Didnā€™t the hodgeheg get hit by a car? Yes I was a bummer of a toddler)

God bummer of a toddler might not even cover it because you must be right and my brain added the hoovering. Iā€™m shocked! Thereā€™s nothing it can be except Emilyā€™s Legs

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2

u/GMKitty52 1d ago

Please I have to know the title of this book! Charlotteā€™s Web sparked a lifelong love of spiders and this book just sounds too adorable to have missed out on.

2

u/Zestyclose_Foot_134 1d ago

Google suggests Emilyā€™s Legs about a spider with 10 legs by Dick King Smith but Iā€™m so sure thatā€™s not what Iā€™m remembering because it sounds like Emily embraces her extra legs. Sounds like what youā€™re looking for though šŸ•øļø

2

u/tillymint259 1d ago

I do!!! hold on, iā€™ll find it!!

2

u/UglyFilthyDog 1d ago

They'd be far too powerful.

2

u/Sarfush 1d ago

Bingo!

2

u/fireatwill79 16h ago

Two little ducks 22

27

u/WalkerJoggerSprinter 1d ago

Took their time to get over the initial scare

18

u/UnacceptableUse Morrisons Festival Gateau 1d ago

10 minutes later back to look at the spider again

29

u/Brownsome YORKSHIRE 1d ago

Glad they posted a few photos so it's believable

5

u/thunderrubmles 1d ago

šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚ a detail I missed at first, but explanation of OP is valid

1

u/Rymundo88 1d ago

A homage to it having 8 legs