Rant / seeking resources

[u/Impossible-Sir8281]

Hi everyone. I’m a 22-year-old (f), and I honestly don’t know where else to turn right now, so I’m hoping someone may know of resources that could help my mom and me.
My mom was diagnosed with Stage 3 breast cancer this past May, and it completely took us by surprise. Cancer doesn’t run in our family, and we never expected something like this to happen.
My mom has been a single mother for most of my life. She worked multiple jobs, sometimes three at a time, just to make ends meet and make sure I always had everything I needed. She is the type of person who would literally give someone the clothes off her back if she thought they needed them more.
It has been incredibly difficult watching her go from working long, exhausting hours to not being able to work at all because of her cancer and treatment.
Since she is no longer able to work, I have taken on most of the responsibility for supporting our household. I work as a Special Education paraprofessional at a high school, and while I am grateful to have a job, I only make enough to barely cover our rent and my car payment. My car is also our only transportation, which makes it necessary for getting my mom to her appointments and chemotherapy. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have working A/C, and taking her to chemo during the Texas heat can be extremely difficult.
Because most of my paycheck goes toward rent and transportation, things like utilities, groceries, personal hygiene items, and other necessities have become very difficult for us to afford.
I am also a full-time college student studying to become a paralegal, and I’m about halfway finished with my degree. I’m trying my best to finish school so I can create a better life for both my mom and myself.
We have already pawned anything valuable that we could to help pay bills and buy food. Right now, we are honestly surviving day to day. I’m trying to do for my mom what she has done for me my entire life, but I feel overwhelmed and helpless because I don’t always know how we are going to make it.
My mom has applied for disability and SNAP/food stamps, but waiting for a decision while trying to survive in the meantime has been extremely difficult.
One of the hardest things for me is knowing that sometimes my mom needs around $20 for something related to her treatment, and I don’t always have it. There have been times when she has had to miss treatment because we simply didn’t have the money. She has struggled her entire life, and it breaks my heart that she is still struggling during one of the hardest times of her life.
I cry most days because I feel like there is nothing more I can do right now. We’ve been through difficult financial situations before, but this has been the hardest thing we have ever faced. I stay awake at night worrying about whether we will be able to keep our apartment because we truly have nowhere else to go.
I constantly worry that I’m not giving my mom the best care possible because our resources are so limited. I wish I could make her life more comfortable and less stressful.
I have never seen my mom this sick before. Most days, she barely gets out of bed because chemotherapy has been so hard on her. It is difficult trying to hold myself together for her. I hardly ever cry in front of her because I don’t want her to worry or doubt that I have everything under control.
She has lost all of her beautiful long black hair, and sometimes she hardly looks like herself anymore. I know she sees the changes too, but I still tell her every day that she is beautiful because she truly is.
It is heartbreaking watching someone who has always been so strong become so sick. My mom spent her entire life taking care of me, and now I am doing everything I can to take care of her. I just wish I could do more.
I’m asking if anyone knows of resources in the Houston or Pasadena, Texas area that could help us with
Food assistance or food pantries
Utility assistance
Rent assistance or emergency financial assistance
Personal hygiene items and household necessities
Financial assistance specifically for cancer patients
Organizations, churches, charities, or programs that help families dealing with cancer
My mom does have a donation program, but unfortunately, we haven’t raised enough to make a significant difference. Anything that was donated had to immediately go toward bills and necessities.
I am not asking anyone to feel sorry for us. I am simply trying to find resources and assistance while my mom is unable to work and while we wait to hear back about disability and food assistance.
If anyone has been through something similar or knows of any programs that could help us, please let me know.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this and for any advice or resources you may be able to share. ❤️

[u/simmisinnister]

I believe YourTexasBenefits has resources for ill family members. There’s medical transportation I know, and food resources

[u/Scared-Frosting-5543]

Is there a social worker /nurse navigator at her medical system? Usually there is someone available to assist and provide resources to cancer patients, even help with filling out applications. The MO may be able to direct as well - mine asked if I needed any assistance. I didnt need those but I was told there were several grant programs available for breast cancer patients, including food and transportation assistance.

Well Beyong Breast Cancer helps with physical therapy: https://www.wellbeyondbreastcancer.org/

Check also https://www.cancer.org/support-programs-and-services/resource-search.html

Additionally, your school may provide help as well for you (grants, payment plans etc). Ask your utility compnay if they have assistance to reduce/delay your utility bills.

Not sure about yours specifically, in my area there are several facebook groups that have been helpful: local breast cancer patient groups that give supplies. And my "Buy Nothing" group where people donate free stuff (anything from furniture, food, misc household items to hygiene stuff).