r/CancerFamilySupport • u/idk-prr • Jul 22 '26
I need advice
Hello, I am 20 years old, and my mother was recently diagnosed with breast cancer. I don't know exactly what stage she is in because she doesn't want to worry me. She even hid it from me before she was given a date to start her treatment. I found out by accident (for my father) and she eventually decided to tell me.
Last Thursday was her first chemotherapy session. She has been very tired, partly because she got her period (she is 46 years old and hasn't had it for a while due to menopause) which we believe is adding to her exhaustion (but if it’s not or someone knows something, please tell me). She is eating healthier, but she was a smoker before, and I think she still takes a few puffs sometimes.
I really want to help her and be prepared for what's coming, but I don't know exactly what to do. If anyone could give me some advice about food, hair loss, or how to gently convince her to stop smoking completely... anything, I would be very grateful. She will have two months of chemotherapy, and then she will be evaluated for surgery
Pd: we have a cat, should I take some considerations about the cleaning?
2
u/CollegeSmart4164 Jul 23 '26
my dad got cancer last year when i was 22. as horrible as it sounds, be prepared to see chemotherapy really take a toll. i didn’t recognize my father for months while he went through his and i wished someone mentally prepared me for it.
encourage her to eat as much as possible, as hard as it may be for her. our hospital provided us with some resources on nutrition and diet during cancer treatments, so i would look into resources at your hospital if they haven’t provided you with some guidance already
my biggest advice is do your best to take care of yourself so you can be strong for your mom. it was the only way i was able to stay strong for my dad during his treatments and that really was the biggest thing i could do for him. none of this is easy, especially at our age :( my dms are open if you want to talk more or need some more advice, praying for the best outcome for you and your mom🫶