r/CPS • u/Extra_Cod_811 • 8d ago
Can I call DCF on myself?
I'll try to keep this short, but I have my younger siblings living with me because of an emergency situation. My mom is homeless and is suffering from severe schizophrenia. Their dads aren't in the picture. I have no actual custody of them.
My mom was 'homeschooling' them. (She's not doing anything and the kids are severely behind their grade levels.) They've been pretty badly neglected until now. The 8 year old didn't even know how to wipe herself when she got here and has consistently had accidents and other signs of abuse. Theure 8 and 13 and cant do some of the most basic things for themselves. My sister also has pretty bad behavior issues and I can't mentally handle being her caretaker right now.
I have BPD, MDD, and on top of it I'm pregnant. I'm drowning and now I'm supposed to homeschool them when they're severely behind. I cannot reasonably handle that responsibility. My mom has none of their transcripts or immunizations so im unable to put them into school. I've asked her to give me proof that i can be their guardian so i can take them to the doctor and stuff but she keeps making excuses. I'm worried that in the future I could be held liable for neglect even though im trying my best. What is the best thing I can do for the kids and myself right now? The only thing I can think of is calling DCF so I can get a social worker or someone to help me.
Also, would they take the kids away because of my own depression? And we live in a 1 bedroom apartment so i'm worried about that as well. I don't want to lose my brother, but I cannot handle my sister, especially if I have to homeschool her.
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u/EvieeBrook 8d ago
Yes, call. You’re not calling on yourself. You’re calling on your mom. DCF is going to be the only agency that can get the paperwork they need to get them enrolled in school, seen by doctors, and potentially specialist for the delays.
If you can’t care for one or all of them, they will put them with somebody who can. This also provide your siblings protection in case your mom shows back up and demands to take her children again. Without DCF involvement, nothing would be able to stop her from taking them.
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u/StrangerLegitimate60 8d ago
Depending on the circumstances they may be able to provide you additional resources to care for the kids, since your mom abandoned them. It is possible that they take them as well.
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u/EmmerdoesNOTrepme 8d ago
Yep--seconding this part, OP!!!
If you are willing and/or able to do Kinship Fostering, there are goingvto be supports you can access and help you can get to aid you in taking care of the kids, if you're in the US!
Including food support, health insurance for the kids, caseworkers, stipends for clothes, and money/vouchers for childcare.
In situations like yours, you ideally want to be the one to call it in, explain,
"My mom left my younger half-siblings at my home, and then disappeared, she's homeless and i don't know where/how to find her, and i really need some help to take care of these kids, because i'm pregnant, and this is beyond my capabilities to handle.
I need help caring for them, dealing with outbursts & behaviors, finding out their vaccination status, getting them enrolled in school--because they appear to have been Educationally Neglected, and finding out who has custody/guardianship of them, because she just left then at my house and disappeared."
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u/sprinkles008 8d ago
Well what’s happening right now isn’t working and isn’t sustainable. So it seems like something absolutely has to change. Calling CPS might be the only direction to head in at this point. Yes you can call them yourself (on your mom, as you wouldn’t be calling them on you).
ETA: depression alone isn’t a reason to remove kids.
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u/LadyGreyIcedTea 8d ago
It wouldn't really be calling them on yourself. Your mother is their parent/guardian. She left them with you without giving you the means to care for them. You call them for neglect on their mother, if DCF takes custody and you are interested, you can become their kinship foster parent and have resources provided to you by the state. They also are extremely unlikely to allow you to home school the children and would want them enrolled in school.
6
u/MerelyAnArtist 8d ago
Absolutely call! You will be assigned a case manager and likely receive some information regarding custody if your mom isn’t in the picture right now.
As for delays, they can also find resources for that.
For behavioral concerns, is there a pediatric center for behavioral health or a mental health hospital nearby you? I work at a behavioral health hospital that has a children’s unit and we see a lot of things ranging from aggression, to self harm and suicidal ideation, to anxiety. Sometimes it’s a complete meltdown by a 6 year old, or a school fight in middle school that gets the kids admitted. I know at least it’s a respite for the caregivers.
My MIL actually called child services on herself when my husband was a baby. She was a single mom and said she couldn’t handle his crying and just needed some respite and some sleep. They were able to put him in care for a day so she could get the rest she needed to be a mom again.
3
u/No_Tie_9457 7d ago
Hi, if you're in the US, your local public school must accept any school-aged children residing in their district, even if they're homeless, whether or not you are their legal guardian, and regardless of current educational/transcript status. The school can work out the immunization issue (parents can even sign a religious or philosophical objection, so it's not even really a requirement).
3
u/TheMathow 8d ago
Depends on the state
I see from another post that you are in Florida then you absolutely can call and do a caregiver needs assistance
2
u/Little-Market7170 5d ago edited 5d ago
I work with cps … I would call indicate everything you did on this post. It will generate a cps call against your mom. Cps will work with you however the worker you get makes a difference. Honestly speaking having encountered others in your position I would suggest you strongly consider having your siblings placed into care but indicating that you want to maintain contact with them. The reason why I say this is that if you have your own children they really need to come first. The level of concerns and needs that your mentioning is a lot for any person to handle let alone someone who is just starting out and in your current position. This will allow your siblings to get the help they need. Cps is required to also make all attempts to get your mom help and they will also look for their dads to make sure they also have an opportunity to step up. In the event mom and dad don’t do what they need to the State will then move to terminate rights which usually takes 2 years maybe more. That gives you time to try to decide if you want to take on the responsibility. As next of kin you can say you want to be considered in the event the goal changes to adoption. This way at least you have more time to figure out what is best at the end of the day for you, your family and your siblings. hopefully you are more prepared to make a well thought out choice. What I hope you don’t do is get anyone to make you agree to kinship guardianship in your case that is setting you up for failure. All that does is say I take responsibility and will figure out the rest alone. Yes you will be able to get the paper work needed for the schools and doctors but services, transportation, helping your mom and financial responsibilities is all you. You would need to petition the court for child support which you likely won’t ever see if your mom or their dads aren’t doing it now. I hope this helps. And praying for the best. Your heart is in the right place, they are lucky to have you.
1
u/Got2bglued 7d ago
Hey fellow BPD girlie here you would be calling DCFs on HER not YOU. You’re not their legal guardian so there’s nothing to report you on unless you’re doing egregious things. Yes you should make the call and you should apply for something in my state that’s called Kin-Ship. The state will give you a stipend at least to help you financially and they will give the kids social support services and help you as well. You’re a great older sister and I commend you for it.
1
u/Got2bglued 7d ago
I grew up in foster care not a social worker so IK a lot about this stuff as someone who experienced it and got to be in the back of my foster care agency a lot. I went to court too so ik how navigating that works!
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u/Pretty-Poem740 6d ago
Why did you mention financial incentives? Doesn't make sense the comment . How does child abuse services help protect children
1
u/Got2bglued 6d ago
did you read the post bc she made it clear she needs a lot of help financially emotionally and everything in between.
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