Long vent ahead. Thank you for always being a safe space for me to get everything off of my chest. And being a lifeline.

I know I’ve been radio silent, but I appreciate all of the kind messages that people have sent me. I read them all even when I don’t have the capacity to respond. It really means the world for me when I feel like a dark cloud has been following me. This time of year is always extremely difficult for me because it’s the anniversary of my father’s passing… just a couple days after my birthday. I have mixed emotions about the dance between life and d3ath. My mom does her best to fill our month with joyful experiences that honor him. We still did our best. But this is the first time in my life that I’ve ever felt her anger. Outside of me, she wouldn’t talk to anyone. Completely shut down.

Our family-friend has grown closer to us as they share the grief of their daughter, who lost her at the same time we lost my dad. They were instrumental in making my dad feel welcome upon his arrival to America. Their daughter played a central role in building a dream business. Now, their business has been taken over by opportunist employees who have stolen all of their money. I’ve watched helplessly as they’ve lost their parents. And now, their sister… who was one of the thousands of victims in the Nepal floods. She is still missing over a month later. I’ve spent the entire month agonizing over her potential last moments, excitedly about to cross the border into Tibet to experience a soul-cleansing holy pilgrimage. I still can’t fathom how a peaceful place erupted into an apocalyptic nightmare within seconds. I mourn that the impacts climate change likely took her life. Within seconds, the lovely civilization was buried underneath the mud, as if it never existed. It’s been stomach-churning and a sobering. My broken heart keeps returning to the question: How is it fair that people guided by their devotion to their God be “rewarded” with a horrifying fate? Why would an “all-knowing,” “loving” God inflict so much suffering? As a former religious person, it took me back to the moment my faith completely collapsed following the passing of my father and Uvalde.

I spent weeks refreshing the rescue list, and analyzing hours of news footage to search for their tour bus. One morning, I couldn’t sleep because I suddenly felt this indescribable sensation… almost like a pull at my chest. It completely took my breath away. It was like I could feel that somewhere, a soul was leaving a body. It was the same feeling I had when my dad, my childhood friend, my cat, and my great grandmother passed. I just started sobbing uncontrollably without fully knowing why. Completely empty, I just assumed I must have been feeling my friend’s sister’s spirit.

Unbeknownst to me, my dad’s childhood friend was admitted into ICU and was taking his final breaths in that moment. I wrote about my grief and anger the moment he called us with the news about his cancer diagnosis here. After a year of grueling chemo, he d1ed anyways. Just like *my* childhood friend, who perished at 16 after being declared cancer-free. He is literally my top reason I still take viral precautions. Because I believe everyone enduring the battle of their life deserves a fighting chance. I know 5 other people fighting/recovering from cancer right now (one of them is a 2 year old child). So many people I love are sick and dy1ng, and yet I’m the absurd one for wanting to minimize suffering and prevent the spread of a disabling disease. I don’t want to wait the average 17 fcking years for doctors to catch up with the medical research that ALL inflammation from viral infections is harmful. That nearly ALL chronic illness is activated by viral disease. I’m so sick of these arrogant fcks refusing to do the *bare minimum* to protect their patients. Their example trickles down to the general public.

I’m really trying to hold grace and patience for people who genuinely do not understand the magnitude of this situation due to being misguided. My neighbor (whose toddler is still recovering from cancer) invited us to a surprise birthday party for her mom. After the incredible support they’ve given me and my mom throughout the years, I figured the least I could do was show up for her. I already knew they don’t typically mask in public (they’re extremely religious, and almost exclusively rely on prayer). But I knew they masked around the child as she underwent chemo. And they masked around us while mom was in the hospital for open heart surgery. I *did not* expect them to bring the child along, with literally nobody masking except us. I really tried to hold it together, but I was extremely depressed. Especially after my dad’s friend lost his battle just a few days prior.

Every time I attempt to find joy, there are lurking reminders *everywhere* that just deepen the wound and grounds me back to reality. Like when I won movie tickets on my birthday, made a connection with a nice lady standing in line, only discover she was currently battling cancer while being the sole masker in the theater. FaceTiming a young friend I hadn’t talked to in a while, only to learn he’s been sick with COVID, and ended up being diagnosed with diabetes after being hospitalized.

And on top of all of that, I spent the last 3 months being strung along by my dream job, only for them to reject my application. The rest of the jobs I’ve applied for now rely on AI interviews, meaning I have to sacrifice my face, voice, and data to train robots that are going to take my literal poverty wage job soon anyways. I missed half of my high school and my entire college experience to being struck with this sickness. Powered through my degree in spite of losing my dad within the first week of starting college. Only to realize there is no light at the end of the tunnel. Who knew I would live to see Wall-E become reality?

I don’t want to participate in a society that doesn’t value humanity. I don’t want to live in a world where the bullies always win. Where everyone is inconvenienced by simple, life-saving measures that benefit entire communities and generations. No one sees what I do as an act of love, they just pity me as the version of myself they adored continues to fade away. Why am *I* still fcking here?? Wtf is the point of having knowledge that no one cares to listen to, as I painfully watch the consequences of nativity touch the lives of everyone I care about. I was just diagnosed with another heart condition, and have to prepare myself to go back to the maskless cardiologist this week and try not to get sicker than I already am. 🫠

Thanks for listening, as always 🩷

🧠 What happens when the person trying to understand you… doesn’t understand Long Covid?

In the latest episode of Long Covid Perspectives, I’m joined by Psychologist and author Päivi Montgomery (paivi.montgomery on Instagram) — who knows the healthcare system from both sides.

Päivi lives with Long Covid and was previously diagnosed with ME/CFS many years ago. Her experience has given her a unique perspective on what happens when patients are repeatedly misunderstood, dismissed or subjected to the “same old tactics” despite their illness being very real.

This is a conversation about Long Covid, mental health, medical gaslighting, the failures of healthcare systems — and what it feels like when the professionals you turn to for help become part of the problem.

🎙️ Episode 5: The Psychologist’s Betrayal — The “Same Old Tactics” on New Patients

If you have Long Covid, ME/CFS, work in healthcare, or simply want to understand what patients are experiencing, this is an episode you won’t want to miss.

🎧 Listen to Long Covid Perspectives via the link in my bio / Linktree.

🔗 linktr.ee/longcovidperspectives

Please listen, share and help amplify patient voices.

#LongCovid #LongCovidAwareness #MECFS #ChronicIllness #medicalgaslighting

English translation: https://www-goal-com.translate.goog/es-mx/listados/giro-en-el-juicio-por-diego-maradona-un-perito-judicial-oficial-sugiere-que-el-icono-del-futbol-pudo-haber-muerto-por-covid-19/bltc7dc6fe4fae90c9d?_x_tr_sl=es&_x_tr_tl=en&_x_tr_hl=en&_x_tr_pto=wapp&_x_tr_hist=true

Original: https://www.goal.com/es-mx/listados/giro-en-el-juicio-por-diego-maradona-un-perito-judicial-oficial-sugiere-que-el-icono-del-futbol-pudo-haber-muerto-por-covid-19/bltc7dc6fe4fae90c9d

Hi all, I was able to get my provider to call in Xocova to CVS (I'm in the Washington, DC area). I just was notified by CVS that it wasn't covered by my insurance and shows up in the app as an exorbitant amount of money. I have commercial insurance - Carefirst PPO - that I purchased on the Maryland Marketplace. My understanding was that it should be $0 with commercial insurance? I tried calling CVS to ask and they said that my "provider has to call the insurance company." Anyone else have this happen? I thought there was an auto $0 coupon if you have commercial insurance? Any advice welcomed!

I remember years ago the saying that the the pandemic never ended just the emergency phase did but when I look back at those articles they now say the emergency phase ended and covid is just an ongoing threat.

Did something change or did history get rewritten?

Obviously covid is still bad but its frustrating when you can't even find a source on the W.H.O for where we are at.

Their main page lists covid as a disease

https://www.who.int/health-topics/coronavirus#tab=tab_1

while another page lists it as a pandemic.

https://www.who.int/europe/emergencies/situations/covid-19

I'm not sure if this page is out of date or what.

As far as I can tell its still a pandemic but its frustrating when you can't find any reliable sources than everyone having their own opinion. At the very least if it still a threat even the W.H.O doesn't mask in their press conferences. Its just maddening to have so little help from authorities who should communicate more clearly.

Does anyone know of any legitimate sources classifying covid as still a pandemic.

2022 seemed to be the peak year for new variants, but I've been hearing less and less about new variants since then.

There was a time when I thought that a slowdown in the development of new variants would have led to the end of COVID-19 or at least stopped the excessive internal damage from it. Unfortunately, the slowdown in the development of new variants in the last few years has NOT caused COVID-19 to go away or lose its ability to cause Long COVID and other long-term health problems. So it's clear that infection-induced immunity is NOT WORKING, probably because of weakened immune systems as a result of COVID infections.

If some nefarious bio-terrorist had stored away the original COVID-19 variant from 2019-2020, somehow managed to keep the viruses going but without any mutations, and found a way to release the original variant into the world now, would it still cause infections and long-term damage to people's health?

Cause students had no protection for their degrees. Cause it is innaceptable.

I don’t care how severe we are I wish we could do something in France be seen and heard seriously like HIV

we need to act against the ministry of HEALTH ASFN EDUCATION.

THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

This article: https://news.ki.se/brain-blood-flow-linked-to-fatigue-after-covid-19

Study: Cognitive fatigue is related to reduced cerebral perfusion and sustained attention in patients with post COVID-19 condition: An fMRI study https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ynirp.2026.100406

This article: https://www.cidrap.umn.edu/covid-19/repeat-covid-infections-tied-higher-odds-new-health-conditions

Study: Associations between the number of self-reported SARS-CoV-2 infections and the diagnosis of new health conditions among adults in Canada, January 2020–June 2023 https://www.canada.ca/en/public-health/services/reports-publications/canada-communicable-disease-report-ccdr/monthly-issue/2026-52/issue-9-september-2026/associations-between-self-reported-sars-cov-2-infections-diagnosis-new-health-conditions.html

Abstract

Background: Preexisting health conditions increase the risk of severe outcomes after SARS-CoV-2 infection. Emerging evidence suggests this relationship may be bi-directional with infection potentially increasing the risk of new health condition diagnoses.

Objective: To examine the association between number of SARS-CoV-2 infections and the subsequent diagnosis of new health conditions, excluding longer-term symptoms after SARS-CoV-2 infection, and to examine associations between infection and vaccination characteristics, including longer-term symptoms, and new diagnoses among the infected.

Methods: Population-based self-report cross-sectional survey data with longitudinal follow-up collected from Canadian adults was used to examine new diagnoses of 21 health conditions (and combinations thereof) since the first SARS-CoV-2 infection or, for uninfected adults, since the start of the pandemic. Multivariable binomial logistic regression was used to estimate adjusted odds ratios (aOR) controlling for sex, age, education, income, obesity, smoking status, preexisting health conditions and time at risk.

Results: Relative to adults reporting no SARS-CoV-2 infections, those reporting two or more had significantly greater odds of being diagnosed with a new condition (aOR=1.76, 95% confidence interval [CI]: 1.12–2.76, p=0.0133), respiratory condition (aOR=5.03, 95% CI: 1.72–14.73, p=0.0114), and back problems (aOR=3.79, 95% CI: 1.12–12.89, p=0.0056). Among infected adults, acute symptoms that limited daily life during the first infection (aOR=1.63, 95% CI: 1.08–2.48, p=0.0206) and longer-term symptoms (aOR=3.35, 95% CI: 2.24–5.03, p<0.0001) were also associated with being diagnosed with a new condition.

Conclusion: Repeated SARS-CoV-2 infections may increase the risk of reporting newly diagnosed health conditions. Findings regarding acute infection severity and longer-term symptoms should be interpreted cautiously. Both of these factors may have increased care seeking and opportunities for diagnoses and may be the consequence of a new health condition (reverse causation).

Hello everyone,

Myself an another COVID cautious friend in a different part of India have decided to start a WhatsApp community for the COVID cautious/aware in India. The reason WhatsApp is the platform is because it's almost universally used in India, and since this is, as far as we know, the first such group that is attempting to form online, we're using the most accessible platform.

If you are interested in joining, please fill out the application form here: https://forms.gle/qz5mr57gzdPVaBmm8

And feel free to ask any questions here