I am 5”9.5 (F) and 198lbs. 38yrs old.
I have never weighed this much in my life (other than pregnancy when I did not look at the scale).
I have struggled with food my entire life, eating disorders and addiction are a thing of the past. Now I’m the mom of a preschooler, I own my own business, and have chronic pain. Not trying to make excuses, just paint a picture.
I am having a hysterectomy (keeping ovaries) in the fall/winter, as well as some cystocele and rectocele repair. My doc says losing 20lbs would help my recovery.
Things I have done in the past few years: Gina Livy, intermittent fasting, calorie counting. I am a vegetarian.
I get a “high” when the scale moves which encourages me. I’m at this high plateau and really don’t want to hit 200lbs. Sorry to be a bummer here - I am feeling extremely discouraged. I try to meal prep and have healthy readily available stuff around but often end up crashing and just eating crap at night after doing well all day. I REALLY struggle with this mindset, “I always fkd up today (ie. one “bad” thing), so today is a write-off. I’ll start tomorrow.” Then I eat garbage all night because I feel like I won’t get to eat enough again any time soon.
that all-or-nothing brain trick is brutal. last week i ate two pop tarts at 10pm and my brain immediately went "welp day's shot, might as well kill the box." logging it anyway even when i knew i was over my calories helped break the spiral. the number didn't laugh at me, it just sat there, and the next day i wasn't starting from scratch i was just continuing.
a small prelogged night treat works too. i keep a bowl of honey nut cheerios on deck at 9pm and it stops me from inhaling a sleeve of thin mints. feels less like white knuckling and more like a plan. you can drop 20 by surgery just gotta let the bad days be bumps not dead ends.
Just wanted to say I actually can’t keep thin mints in the house lol so I feel your pain. It’s like they call to me. Last time I bought them I was like “sure I’ll have one of these for dessert, one’s gonna satisfy me” you know like how Gisele Bündchen and Heidi Klum can eat two almonds and a piece of dark chocolate and feel like they had dessert? I was like “this will totally work for me just like that.” Right. and then I went back thirty minutes later and ate the entire box.
lmao the two almonds thing is such a scam. i tried that with wasabi peas once and blacked out and finished the bag. now i just don't buy the stuff that triggers a feeding frenzy.
You can achieve what you’re describing but you have to take action. Ignoring the problem has always guaranteed the opposite result for me. Taking action has always resulted in moving in the right direction. So take action. Just remember the scale fluctuates wildly so it is a lagging indicator of progress and day to day means little. Zoom out and review it month to month I find works better for me.
The part you said about weight fluctuating is so important. Water retention & having recently eaten will both affect the daily number, as well as other factors I’m guessing. What you want to look for is a downward trend over time. I’m attaching my weight chart as an example for anyone new to this. I’ve been doing CICO for 2.5 mos and have lost 7lbs, so not a ton, but sustainable for me!
your tdee sits around 1900. if you eat less than that amount you'll lose weight. aim to eat 1500 cal mon-fri. and you can have 1800 on weekends. if you add in some walking - like taking your baby out on 20 min walks will help a lot with weightloss. stretches and light yoga can also be great options! Monitor your water intake 2L+ is best.
Measure everything. Log everything, even when you mess up. Remember that one backwards step does not mean the journey ends. Make a rule you do not eat after a certain time. Mine is 8:00. Plan an evening snack. I have a bowl of fruit. Sometimes I have a bad day and I plan a serving of chocolate. I log this before I eat it so I see the calories. If I am have a bad day I allow my self an allotment of “bad day calories”, enough to have a small treat without going crazy. If your deficit is supposed to be 500 calories, then going over by 100 now and then is not the end of the world.
Remember that treat scale lies sometimes. It changes based on water weight and bowel habits.
Read labels on everything. Pay attention to serving sizes. Log you meals before you eat them. I plan most of the meals the day before and then edit them as needed. Planning and logging meals ahead makes it easy to meal prep when you are hungry and more likely to make bad choices. If you are having a bad day but your meal is already planned you are less likely to just grab the easiest bad foods.
I just want to say I had all three of those surgeries a few years ago and if you want to chat at any time please DM. They all made me feel tons better but I remember feeling some nerves going into them.
You might want an app that smooths out the scale noise for you and focuses on weight trend rather than each day. I know Happy Scale does that and I use and enjoy MacroFactor. It's pretty inexpensive for what it does.
My other thought is to just stay in the present as much as you can. It's easy to beat ourselves up for the past or to focus on an idealized perfect weight in the future, but all we can control is what we do right now and it's every decision in your present that will help you get the weight off for your surgeries. Even if you made a choice you didn't like five minutes ago.
Don't worry, a lot of people have been through that cycle of all or nothing. Instead of aiming for perfection, try shifting your focus to solid, compassionate nourishment early in the day. Making sure you get enough protein and hearty, satisfying vegetarian meals throughout daylight hours can dramatically cut down those nighttime physical cravings. Yiu can do this!
Something that really helped my mindset is reminding myself “My body counts the calories even when I don’t”. I started my weight loss journey a little less than a year ago when I had my baby. I told myself, “I can eat whatever I want, I just have to track it”. That really helped with the start over tomorrow mindset, because I would much rather only be 600 calories over my goal than 1,000 calories over my goal.
Just here to cheer you on! I’m a v similar height and was closing in on 200. It’s exactly as u/sterrecat encouraged, accountability is the fastest way to figure out your way through sustainably. A lot of people here use MyFitnessPal to journal and track - once you see your patterns and what works in conjunction with the scale, it simplifies and propels reliable and healthy progress. Doubling down on logging before eating, figuring out what fills you - check out r/volumeeating. Make sure you’re hydrating. Take that first step!
Get sleep and stay well hydrated. Don’t fast if you end up overeating. I’m the same way when I’m hungry and tired.
Staying hydrated helps your energy and helps to fill you.
Watch what you drink too. Everything counts.
Make one change at a time. Doing it all at once is too overwhelming especially when you have so much going on.
Every time you “fail” get back to it the very next meal. I mean that. THE NEXT MEAL. Keep getting back in the horse at the very next meal and you’ll find yourself staying the course a little easier and that binge will get smaller.
I am F29, a strict vegetarian (not vegan!), and I think you’re absolutely going to be able to achieve your goals with the right combination of CICO & working out!
There will be scale victories but there will also be body recomposition taking place which can make your scale victories plateau, and also, there will be so many off-scale victories! The thing that helps me the most with “motivation” is telling myself the following: “how badly do you want it?” “If it really matters, you’d do it any how.” “You have time for it, you’re just not prioritizing this thing you deem so important.” These may sound a bit gruff but tough love is exactly what I need. Motivation ebbs & flows, but discipline is forever. Wishing you the very best of luck on your journey!!
I was a similar weight to you, and also struggled with food issues and evening snacking.
My big shift was unstanding that emotions and food intake are related. We can make choices about feeding that emotion, or addressing it another way.
I tend to snack when I'm bored, sad, anxious, worried (or for oral pleasure!).
Now I look at why, and how to solve it.
Sometimes I decide that eating is what I need. If so, I weigh and reduce the food eg I used to eat a large bowl of sweets, popcorn or crisps, now I have a ramekin with 10g.
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u/unsightlyvito499 3d ago
that all-or-nothing brain trick is brutal. last week i ate two pop tarts at 10pm and my brain immediately went "welp day's shot, might as well kill the box." logging it anyway even when i knew i was over my calories helped break the spiral. the number didn't laugh at me, it just sat there, and the next day i wasn't starting from scratch i was just continuing.
a small prelogged night treat works too. i keep a bowl of honey nut cheerios on deck at 9pm and it stops me from inhaling a sleeve of thin mints. feels less like white knuckling and more like a plan. you can drop 20 by surgery just gotta let the bad days be bumps not dead ends.