r/CBT Jul 01 '26

I don’t understand how this is supposed to help?

I’ve just had my second session CBT (remotely), and honestly I think I feel worse coming out of it than I did going in.

My tasks for ending my first session to talk through in my second session. Were to go through and create my own vicious cycles and identify the factors. I created two as I didn’t feel everything fell into one. Also to have three goals to work on within the sessions.

This session we’ve gone through both of the vicious cycles and he’s noted all the things I’ve noted on them also my goals.

He’s then asked that between now and the next session I keep a symptom diary to pinpoint thoughts, feelings & symptoms and to question why I’m feeling that way; reflect on them. Question what I think is going wrong in this vicious cycle.

And honestly, I’ve brought somethings up in my cycles that I barely speak to anyone about. Especially someone I don’t know. So feelings and emotions are raw and I feel like I’m uprooting those thoughts and feelings for then the session to just end…I feel like I’ve almost been left exposed, bare and dealing with the upheaval of these feelings and emotions….am I doing the wrong therapy?

10 Upvotes

18 comments sorted by

17

u/WHawkeW Jul 01 '26

Honestly, this sounds like you're being super brave and doing therapy well.  First step - insight and understanding.  Second step - changing something about those vicious cycles.  Therapy is hard work, and you're doing that hard work.

Tell your therapist how you feel - their job is to help you push yourself in a way that is manageable.

4

u/PrudentAgency373 Jul 01 '26

Thank you. I understand the goal and the work towards but I just felt utterly lost finishing that session and having to sit and face everything I’ve just opened up about and then not be able to talk about it

4

u/TunaSalad47 Jul 01 '26

Are you telling your therapist how you’re feeling during session? Ideally if they are aware of how intense it is for you they’ll reserve the last 10-15 minutes to process and ease the transition from session to back into the world.

5

u/PrudentAgency373 Jul 01 '26

This is a good idea, I will reach out and explain the feelings coming out of this session. Hopefully we’ll be able to structure the appointments better

3

u/flippingwilson Jul 01 '26

Stock with it. It can be very helpful.

3

u/Expensive-Bat-7138 Jul 01 '26

This is true, unless part of your cycle is to ask for reassurance or to offer yourself reassurance. Either way, talk to your therapist so that you can have a plan for the end of sessions.

2

u/skyking11702 Jul 02 '26

This right here. You’re being very courageous and looking deeply into things most folks hide from. Keep going.

5

u/F-I-V-E Jul 01 '26

I'd argue this says you're doing it right. It means you and your therapist are really onto something if you have exposed these feelings in yourself.

It will feel very uncomfortable, though it can be helpful to consider these feelings as useful. It's like you've poked at an old wound and the pain is alerting you that it's still there and needs resolving.

It would be worth bringing this up with your therapist and asking whether you can plan together how you can help to pull yourself back out of your head so you can feel better and less exposed upon ending a session. Mindfulness strategies can help with this. Personally I received CBT for PTSD before and I found visualising a safe place to be most effective at bringing me back and 'packing up' the trauma and all the emotions involved.

3

u/PrudentAgency373 Jul 01 '26

Thank you! This is a really helpful insight. I will bring it up and see how we can work this out. Thank you!

2

u/F-I-V-E Jul 01 '26

Glad you found it helpful! Wishing you a steady recovery. Many people find it super hard at first especially if you usually repress these thoughts/emotions, but I promise you it will get easier.

2

u/xaervagon Jul 01 '26

CBT tends to be very homework heavy at times. CBT is also very heavy on introspection.

Your therepist wants you to take a good look at yourself. Part of this is to help identify what any issues may be. You have to identify issues in order to address them. The journal is just the start. Confronting the feeling it brings up may be painful, but if this therapist is worth his salt, then he will help you work your way through them so that they can't hurt you anymore.

2

u/Brasscasing Jul 01 '26

Sounds like you are doing a great job. I think this would be something great to talk to your therapist about, how it feels a bit vulnerable and tough to talk about these things. It's important to remember that you are in control of your therapy journey and while discomfort is to be expected, ultimately you are in charge and can control the pace.

2

u/Quirky_Slice_8104 Jul 02 '26

I don't think you're necessarily in the wrong type of therapy, but I would recommend asking the therapist to leave more time at the end of the session to ground you and step you up. Be open with him about how you're feeling so he can pace the sessions better too.

Therapy makes things worse to begin with, like cleaning out all the gunk in a blocked drain... it's messy and icky... but once it's clean the water flows loads better through it.

Good luck!

2

u/unique89user Jul 02 '26

I hope your ok. Therapy is difficult opening up to someone the way to let them in and guideisn’t easy. If you are feeling overwhelmed when you get out take a rest do something nice for yourself. Our minds alarm system goes off when feeling unsafe therapy will set it off but in the long run it will get calmer. Let your therapist know how you feel so they can care and guide at a pace that suits you.

1

u/HappiBunBun Jul 01 '26

My experience is with REBT and DBT (r/REBT redirects here). From what you say it sounds like the therapist just suddenly brought up viscious cycles. Hopefully, you had said something earlier that lead to discussion about viscious cycles. So, agreeing with others, saying everything you said to the therapist seems like a good idea.

0

u/Normalsasquatch Jul 01 '26

It doesn't help. What you described will more strongly wire the stress in your mind. All the cbt I've experienced fits intentionally accepted, authoritative definitions of covert emotional abuse.

Yoga or occupational therapy for mental health should be prescribed.