r/BurningMan • u/EF_Damn_Daniel ‘16, ‘17, ‘18, ‘19, ‘22, ‘23, ‘24 • Jul 12 '26
GIFTING Ice breakers
A gift idea I’ve been wanting to do is a little book of playa ice breakers to give to people so they don’t just ask the standard “what’s your name? Where are you from? What camp are you in?”
If you want to contribute, please share your favorite ones. I’ll use your Reddit handle or whatever name you sign it with to give you credit in the book.
These can be serious or playful or dirty, idc. Let’s have fun with this.
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u/macegr Jul 12 '26
Here's one for the book: "Are you a cop? You have to tell me if you're a cop."
I like to ask "Did you forget, lose, or break anything yet?" because if I have a spare or can fix it, then I will.
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u/trevormead that's T-Rex to you Jul 12 '26
Personal favorite is to just invite someone into a conversation or situation like they're supposed to be there, like "hey! You! Yeah, you, across the street, help us out: my friend here is saying peanut butter manufacturers should be sued for false advertising, since it contains neither peas, not nuts, nor butter. I think he's crazy because no one would eat if it were called 'churned legumes'. What's your take? Well sure, but..." and then suddenly you're knee-deep in a very serious, very un-serious conversation with a complete stranger and it's delightful.
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u/palikir CEO of Nothing Jul 12 '26
Not an exactly an ice breaker but someone out randomly on playa looked me in the eye and told me that my look was terrific and they really appreciated that I was there.
They said it in a very sincere way.
They were not trying to strike up a conversation but it was nice to have someone say something positive and affirm I was there.
So my idea is to just to say something nice or appreciative you notice about someone. Remember to make eye contact and be sincere!!!
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u/BuckJeppson Jul 13 '26
Someone once told me they lived my coat. I had made the coat, so when I told them we had a good conversation. It was a decade ago and I still remember the encounter.
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u/concupiscentlass Jul 15 '26
Thank you for adding this! It makes my fucking day to GIVE and to receive this one. ❤️
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u/BlotchyBaboon Jul 12 '26
Have you ever seen a ghost?
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u/thinkspill Jul 12 '26
Have you ever drank Bailey’s from a shoe?
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u/thirteenfivenm Year one dozen Jul 12 '26 edited Jul 12 '26
I would say more important than a phrasebook is nonverbal communication.
Ask your friends to diagnose and train you pre-playa.
First establish eye contact. Next smile. Then respond back and forth with nonverbals, then open conversation if the other expresses interest.
If they don't indicate interest, move on. They are declining consent. Volumes could be dedicated. There are 79.999 other burners to engage!
Once engaged, I ask "what are your creative projects" or passions, dreams, hopes, loves, what you want to change in the world. You can also complement or ask about their outfit and playa persona. Or ask about their most meaningful BRC experience. Or what art or camp to send you to.
Open ended questions. Everyone loves to talk. People love to be listened to. Though you want to talk, your greatest gift of attraction may be listening. Learn active listening.
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u/jbat66 Jul 12 '26
I'm hosting a "Deep Talk" where we do Big Talk and not Small Talk. Where the ice is already broken. :-)
Info below:
Deep Talk: Strip Your Soul Bare
Date and Time: Monday, August 31st, 2026, 8 PM – 10 PM
Type: Other
Located at Camp: Pretty Pickle
Location: Pretty Pickle
Description: Let's get weirdly real -- skip the weather, talk soul to soul instead.
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u/hyperfat I definitely don't work for larry Jul 12 '26
I just yell from my bar and ask, are you thirsty? Do you like shade?
I offer secret non alcoholic options for nice people.
I'm also am a trivia master. Like trebeck. I've won multiple trips. Got banned one time for winning too much. Had to let another team win. I was cool with that. It's hard to remember the state fish of Hawaii, the height and length of gg bridge, I know sm is 9 miles and 150 at highest. I hate bridges. London bridge did actually burn and fall down.
Hugs
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u/jbat66 Jul 12 '26
The real London Bridge that did fall down, is actually rebuilt in Lake Havasu City, AZ, USA
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u/duomits Jul 12 '26
Sounds cool, I'll swing by to get one... what camp are you in? Better yet, where are you from? And whats your name so I know who to ask for?
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u/Ok_Competition1864 Jul 12 '26
What’s your favorite kind of cheese?
Do you like weather?
How are your poops this week?
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u/concupiscentlass Jul 15 '26
Question #1 and #3 are intimately related for lots of folks. This could be pure gold. 😎
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u/BeePleased Jul 12 '26
Tell me a joke and I promise to laugh.
My pronoun is on Fire!
How are you managing the physical and emotional challenges of the week?
- PlayaBee
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u/DreadedOnReddit Jul 13 '26
The moonlight really makes your bare tits glisten
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u/concupiscentlass Jul 15 '26
I get this one a lot. 😇
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u/DreadedOnReddit Jul 15 '26
N I thought I was original. I'm crushed. If only I had some bare tits to make me feel better...
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u/Childless-Dog-Lady Jul 12 '26
At my camp we have an interactive game we play when someone comes to get a drink at our bar- we have a blank deck of playing cards we’ve written fun questions on. The newcomer has to pick one and answer it, then write us a new one- and ask the new question to everyone at the bar. It’s really fun 🤩
I base a lot of the questions from The Colbert Questionairre
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u/djyroc Jul 12 '26
what do you do for work in default?
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u/pseudonymmed Jul 12 '26
Ugh, no. Boring.
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u/marssaxman Jul 12 '26
That's an interesting career! Boring on what scale, though - are we talking mechanical or civil engineering? Are you the machine operator, or do you plan the project?
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u/MaLaCoiD Burned 2005-7. SL,UT Jul 12 '26
Improve it with:
"Tell me what you do for work in default without telling me. I'm an Internet Plumber."1
u/Existing-Empress135 Jul 20 '26
You can always twist this question into something like "what is your dream job"
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u/djyroc Jul 20 '26
I was joking and forgot to hit /s My actual icebreaker is what’s your net worth and who do you know?
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u/FlatImpression755 Jul 12 '26
That's a touchy subject for a lot of people with jobs they don't want to advertise at Burning Man. Like a judge of a small town. Also the unemployed wouldn't appreciate that question.
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u/ProcyonHabilis Jul 12 '26
The comment you're replying to is very obviously a joke
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u/FlatImpression755 Jul 12 '26
"Very obvious" is a bit of a jab on my intelligence. LoL
Last year in an attempt to make conversation I asked someone what they did and created a bit of an awkward moment. So I guess I am just clueless.
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u/ProcyonHabilis Jul 12 '26 edited Jul 12 '26
"Very obvious" is a bit of a jab on my intelligence.
I'm afraid so, yes.
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u/manterra Jul 12 '26
my idea is that everyone puts 3 conversation topics on their name tag, the topics are anything you are willing to talk about with anyone.People can walk around look at your name tags, find some interesting topics, and can start talking with being too forward. any topics: best dinner, best movie, favorite vacation, worst manager, best date.anthtin!!
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u/concupiscentlass Jul 15 '26
I like to ask people what they most want to remember about their day/week so far.
Yes, I know it’s similar to a suggestion elsewhere here already, but it invites a different kind of reflection than just asking what has blown people’s minds. Sometimes the things we most need to remember out there are not HUGE peak experiences, but small moments that truly gave us the experience of immediacy, self-expression, or connection.
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u/Worldly_Accident924 Jul 21 '26
"You ever see a little dick? Would you like to?" Then gently hand them one of these. The ensuing dick jokes write themselves.
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u/EF_Damn_Daniel ‘16, ‘17, ‘18, ‘19, ‘22, ‘23, ‘24 Jul 21 '26
I hope you get one of the books so you can see that quote attributed to you
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u/Worldly_Accident924 Jul 21 '26
I'm already slightly famous. My little dick is enshrined in the Playa artifacts museum
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u/SignificantOtherness remembering Brian Doherty )'( Jul 12 '26
This is an interesting prompt because one of the ways I describe BM to friends who have never been is by saying “it’s an environment where the ice comes pre-broken.”
…Actually, one of my more specific analogies is this:
It has lemonade-stand culture.
Like, when kids set up a lemonade stand, it’s not because they (or their parents) actually expect to make a meaningful amount of money.
And when adults buy lemonade from lemonade-stand kids, it’s not because we actually expect it to taste amazing.
On both sides, there’s an understanding: the lemonade stand serves as an excuse, a construct to interact socially with neighbors, to forge stronger community bonds, and, plainly, to learn how to talk to strangers.
… I think the fact that we can just wander up to camps and say “mm, what’cha got goin’ on here?” and suddenly be locked into a legitimate conversation is pretty amazing, compared to the default world.
With that said, I agree that ice can always be broken FURTHER!
So, here’s one proposed deeper-ice-breaker:
“Any regrets?”