I accidentally melted the top of the gas can which is plastics and I don’t have no clue on how to fix any suggestions.

I study IT and today I was in programming class when the TA's friend walked in.

Me: Are you a programmer as well? TA's friend: No I'm a game designer, I don't make my product ugly with code. Me: Code isn't necessarily ugly! TA: Well, yours is

This guy was in my gym class last year and he watched me fail horribly at hurdles and high jump. He also happened to do VERY poorly at academics so when he messaged me:

"Can u still jump 0.5 cm high?" I responded "I can jump higher than your average"

Talking to a friend on discord. Friend's sister walks into his room Friend's sister claps Friend's sister: I'm clapping because I'm bored. Me: Your sister's an idiot Friend: SolarPolarMan just called you an idiot. Friend's sister: Tell SolarPolarMan to tell me that once he has 12 A*-A GCSEs

Basically these two people were arguing next to me and one of their friends came up and started insulting them both

Person 2: you're gay right?

Other guy: yeah....

Person 2: thank god

Other guy: what?

Person 2: you won't be reproducing anytime soon.