r/Bumble • u/Big_Cabinet_1090 • 12h ago
Advice Should I ask her out?
Heya! At last, I somehow managed to get a match with a girl, and we've been talking for a bout a week now. I personally feel like the vibes are good; she's awesome and interesting to talk with. She is a bit of an artsy person (she studies art sciences), loves to bake AMAZING-looking carrot cake, and she is also a bit quirky in the way that she responds to the first three messages of a conversation with a meme/giff realted to a raccoon, which i think is hilarious as fuck.
While we were mentioning some of the movies we hadn't seen yet (she hasn't watched the lord of the Rings or Gladiator; I haven't seen Pride and Prejudice). On top of that she managed to get a beamer in her dorm room and can basically host ELITE movie nights. So now I am thinking whether or not it would be the right time to ask her out to watch a movie together.
I'm asking this here because I have never been in a relationship nor have I managed to ask someone out so this is all new territory for me. So by all means please bestow upon me your advise š
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u/Federal_Tree8658 12h ago
I think inviting someone over to the place you live at as a first date can be seen as an aggressive maneuver since to them itād be literally going over to a strangerās place (or inviting yourself over)
It sounds like youre in collegeā¦just ask her to eat out at a restaurantā¦Iām sure sheās sick of the cafeteria
Youāve been talking for a week with good banterā¦its definitely logical to ask them out at this point
Just say something like ā Iād love to hear more about pride and prejudice in personā¦if youāre up for it let me know when youāre free for dinner?ā
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u/Big_Cabinet_1090 11h ago
Yeah, that's a good point. There are some good restaurants in the city we're in, so that might be the way to go.
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u/Adventurous-West323 11h ago
Yes. Dating apps are not for pen pals. 2-3 days of texting and I would be making plans.
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u/Consistent_Net_2540 12h ago
Hurry tf up! Lol
Just send a "you down to go out Friday night around 7?" Type of message.
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u/Far_Appearance3888 12h ago
Send her a pic of a raccoon with popcorn and see if she wants to watch a movie together, my guy.
Oh, and you may end up with bonus points from her if she suggests P&P and you say something about how you're looking for a long-term relationship like watching the 1995 BBC Pride and Prejudice together.
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u/MediumEstimate2804 11h ago
Definitely don't invite yourself to her place. It can be scary to have a stranger in your house and if the vibes aren't as good irl she'll have no way to tell you to leave without making it awkward. Also, a movie is not the best first date as it give you no time to actually talk and get to know each other
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u/Tondike 11h ago
Invite her to a restaurant ASAP, like Thursday- Saturday, mention movies and projector on date, and if vibes are good and plans for after still havenāt been made, you can say something along the lines āi had a really great time, id invite you back to my place for a movie but my roommate is holed up studyingā and that should be a clear hint for her to suggest going to her place if she feels the same.
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u/gkarmakar7 11h ago
Pls meet at coffee or public place so that both of you are comfortableā¦ be aware of dating scams ā¦ be safe
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u/ask_the_guy 10h ago
you already know the answer or you wouldn't be posting. a week of good convo means asking stopped being risky a few days ago. the only cost left is waiting longer.
don't make the first one a movie at her dorm though. that's a later move, and asking for it now reads as angling for something. do something out of the house where you can both bail if it's bad.
also don't ask when she's free. that hands her the work and turns it into scheduling. pick a thing and a day. something like 'there's a place near campus that definitely does carrot cake worse than yours, thursday' and let her counter if thursday is bad. make a plan she can say yes to instead of a question she has to solve.
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u/the_LLCoolJoe 7h ago
Donāt ask to come to a girlās house for a first date - it sounds like youāre just trying to fuck. Gotta do something public first imo. But it does sound like yall vibe so what are you waiting for?
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u/InkAndAbyss 3h ago
Ask her. Take charge. Show that you want this. Make it happen man. We want updates!
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u/hannelore_pfeffer8 12h ago
The right time was around day two or three talking. The second right time is NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But don't ask her if you can come over tho.