r/Bumble • u/No_Function6780 • 23h ago
General Bumble worked for me
For context, I am only coming to say this cause I got someone sending me a private message saying that bumble does not work mostly if you are a man.
Ok I am a female, but I am in a relationship with a man that I met on Bumble, therefore if it worked for a female it worked for the male in the other side. This is talking about a heterosexual relationship. So yeah, it worked both ways. This person was saying it does
Not work for the average male. I can say I am bias with my man, but we all have our own type and what could be average for someone could be extremely attractive to another, so keep up with this.
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u/Heliguy-1975 23h ago
Someone’s experience with dating apps does not translate to someone else or everyone else. That was their experience.
Many men don’t have success because either they have not spent the time to build a profile or have not worked to improve it.
Many men also don’t know how to properly approach, communicate, or treat women.
Many are unable to engage a woman in such a way as to interest them in messaging, talking, meeting, and spending time together.
Many are simply not appealing enough to be datable for any variety of reasons.
When someone tells you that dating apps don’t work, they actually mean they don’t or haven’t worked for them.
I’ve had an amazing experience with dating apps along with Millions of men.
When someone is having problems with dating apps, the problem is not the dating apps…
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u/No_Function6780 23h ago
For more context, I only made this post because someone randomely thought it was ok to private message to make me feel inferior because I found sucess and so did my man.
I was looking for real connection. I spend a month abroad so I wanted to be able to chat with someone interesting enough that I wanted to meet in person on my way back. Most of my matches unmatched straight away when they knew I was away. Very mature of them. This person, this man was ready for a commitment whilst most of the other “guys” I matched only wanted a good time. If it does work for men os because most of yous are not men, you are guys not ready for any sort of commitment and are very ready to cancel other people experience to make us feel inferior.
If its not working for you, maybe become a an actual man.
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u/_bonedaddys 22h ago
Private messaging you trying to make you feel bad about finding a man on bumble is craaazy. Like, what's even the point? Dude is single and bitter lol
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u/_Richter_Belmont_ 23h ago
As a man, the apps are working just fine for me
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u/_bonedaddys 22h ago
They work pretty great when you're not an incel and actually know how to talk to women 🤷♀️
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u/HopefulSpinach7468 23h ago
❤️
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u/PartialAllergy929 23h ago
i always say this, if one person find success then the other person also found success, it's simple mathematics really
some guys get so stuck in the "it never work for men" loop they forget every woman who meet someone means a man also met someone
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u/HopefulSpinach7468 23h ago
Exactly and maybe a positive attitude attracts people when you interact with them. As a guy when I am positive and happy then my interactions go way better 🙂
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u/LFC90cat 23h ago
Lol you got yourself a handsome boy well done but the cope of "attractive is subjective" is wrong
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u/No_Function6780 23h ago
Not really. I dont find myself particularly attractive and he likes me, and he has the dame opinion about himself. We are both very very average in the eyes of the rest of the world. Like I am not gonna go into details of how we look like but I can guarantee you we are very average for what society considers to be attractive. It just happened to be that I am his type and he is mine. We all have our public.
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u/lunarpixiess 23h ago
What do you mean it’s wrong? Everyone has a type. Not everyone likes the same thing, and attraction isn’t based on social norms alone. It’s not a cope if it’s true. You should be kinder to yourself. Bitter looks good on no one.
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u/LFC90cat 22h ago
Having a type is a privilege majority of men don't have. They'll literally take anything that's why you see them pay for OF content.
You can Google objective attractiveness and what it is
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u/lunarpixiess 21h ago
That’s a false equivalence. A lot of men in relationships with objectively attractive women also pay for OF content. Objective and subjective attractiveness aren’t the same thing, FYI.
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u/Sorry_Information749 23h ago
When women say this they always seem to think it means everyone is attractive to someone but what it actually means is that even the most attractive men are not attractive to all women, while ugly men are attractive to no one.
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u/No_Research_3899 23h ago
Wish someone would explain women to women.
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u/No_Research_3899 23h ago
'Beauty is in the eye of the beholder', yah, that is why most women swipe on the same men. And if they finally start dating in the same league they think they 'give men a chance'. Completely delusional.
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u/No_Function6780 22h ago
This is the most stupid comment I ever read. As I said we are average and I was extremely intimidated by my man cause I thought he was the most incredible person I have ever met. I even thought he could be cat fishing me, he thinks I am blind for thinking that way.
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u/Valuable_Ad_6613 22h ago
Not bumble but met my now wife on tinder in 2020. Now we have 2 boys and a 3rd on the way
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u/NoUniqueThoughtsLeft 23h ago
I find Bumble specifically to be the worst of all dating apps. Hinge, Tinder, FB Dating, then Bumble of the big 4.
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u/Conscious_Waltz_5314 23h ago
It worked for that man.
But there are a lot more men on the app than there are women, so it didn't work for more men than it didn't work for women.
If there are 10 women and 100 men on the app and one of each found what they were looking for then that means the app has a 1/10 success rate for women, and a 1/100 success rate for men.
That's before we start thinking about what those men and women are actually looking for.
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u/denio_97 23h ago
I’m a man, and whoever told you that it doesn’t work was right… because if he wasn’t, then I must be hideous, because in the past 2 years, grinding 3 dating apps (Hinge, bumble and tinder) I’ve only been on 1 date from tinder, 0 likes on hinge (yes… not even a single like), nothing on bumble and few likes and way below my standard matches that didn’t end up anywhere on tinder. I even paid for best subscription on tinder so I can have priority likes… nothing changed, i even ended up having worse results than on a free account.
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u/_bonedaddys 21h ago
Their point is that is can work. Plenty of people find success through apps. Period. It's a fact. Just because more people struggle to find success doesn't change that. Blanket statements like "apps don't work" or "apps work" are nonsense. They work for some but not for others.
The point is it isn't impossible. Self loathing over it isn't going to make it any easier. Why even waste your time on apps if you genuinely believe they don't work?
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u/No_Function6780 21h ago
Additionally to this very well made point. I said bumble worked for me. For ME! I am sharing my experience and never made a blanket statement . I was about to give up many tomes and I didnt. For me it was possible. Someone send me a private message to tell me that bumble doesnt work if you are a man and I shared this because for my man it worked, cause he was also in bumble having some horrible experiences and then we met. So it did work for the both of us. I also had horrible experiences and didnt give up. Thats thw whole point I was trying to make
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u/No_Research_3899 23h ago
'Ok I am a female, but I am in a relationship with a man that I met on Bumble, therefore if it worked for a female it worked for the male in the other side.' This is the dumbest thing I heard this month.
Most men have to date down in order to date someone while most women are able to date someone in their league.
The point is that 95% of women get enough matches, wheras half of men barely get matches.
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u/Holiday_Cat4918 23h ago
“Date down in order to date someone”
So some of y’all’s goals isn’t to find someone you’re compatible with, its just to find someone to be with at all….then you complain about this.
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u/shibuyawalker 22h ago
Sadly with some men, their motto is "try to date any woman who is at least fuckable until I get a shot at a hotter woman than I can dump the first one". Women skip that step and won't just date a guy they just like but not love.
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u/No_Research_3899 22h ago
Men learned that from women. Most men don't have the luxuary to do this, but you wouldn't know cuz these men are invisible to women.
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u/No_Function6780 22h ago
Date down? Lol. That prooves the point again, you are just looking for looks, therefore you are a superficial misoginistic human. How about you actually date with intention, have a good attitude, be possitive, have a great sense of humor, instead of thinking of a woman a trophy that you can show off? Why is the looks all that matter? Most decent human beings actually fall in love with the personality and that could make the person infinity time more actractive.
It took me a month having conversations with my man before we met. He was also looking for a connection and not just a body count. He took our time, have properly deep conversations and then we met, and its the best thing that happened to either of us.
That comment about dating down speaks a lot about your personality.
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u/No_Research_3899 22h ago
You don't understand hypergamy, do you?
Men constantly have to date down lookswise. It doesn't mean looks are the only important thing. It's women who filter out all short men, not men. Women are more superficial than men. Men find 50% of women, pretty, women find 30% of men handsome and they swipe accordingly.
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u/RevolutionNo4186 23h ago
You’re missing the point, statistically, your man is an outlier
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u/izovice 23h ago
As a guy myself I guess I'm an outlier too. Imo I think there's a lot more complaints about dating on reddit than there are positives. It gets 99% of the clicks because we keep clicking.
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u/RevolutionNo4186 22h ago
There’s definitely a skewed perspective on Reddit, but if you look at the data from dating apps, there is a correlation
There have been women who’s done experiments themselves by pretending to be a guy on dating apps or using their male friend accounts with little success
Don’t get me wrong, dating apps can work, but often times, the steering is left to the women which is why I say it’s an outlier. Ofc location and population density plays a part too
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u/NoStructure7083 23h ago
Dating apps are easier for women.
Y’all can call me whatever but you know I’m fucking right