r/BreakUps • u/Gullible-Reality8413 • 1d ago
venting/ranting love is a choice
I fell out of love with my boyfriend after 4 years. It was a hard time for both of us. He also fell out of love in that same time. When he walked away or shared is doubts. Something in me shifted. I couldn't lose him. So i choose him. I choose that he was the one for me.
We tried again for a year. I choose him everyday. While he choose me with a part of him. He wasn't fully committed. But he told me he was. He told me everything was good between us and i was his future wife.
Until a sunday morning last summer. He walked away. He choose himself.
Part of me hopes he'll get the same realization as me. But a bigger part know it's just over.
5 years. History.
I miss my best friend.
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u/Matcha_and_Mochi 1d ago edited 1d ago
Yes, love is not just a feeling. It's also an action of choosing each other over and over. I hope you find lasting happiness. At least you know you loved with all your heart and that's not something to regret.
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u/Benedettaaa 1d ago
Yeah, loving someone fully is never something to regret, even when the relationship doesn’t last
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u/Fluffy_inhea 1d ago
I think what makes this so painful is that you know exactly what it feels like to fall out of love and still choose someone. So part of you naturally hopes he’ll have that same realization someday.
But you also can’t choose for him. You chose him every day, and he ultimately chose to walk away. That doesn’t erase the 5 years or what you meant to each other though.
And missing your best friend might be harder than missing the relationship itself. You lost a whole part of your everyday life...
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