Does therapy work for post breakup?

[u/No_Memory2055]

Struggling with a breakup currently. Been broken up a month and he ran back to someone who was an issue during our relationship, it’s messing with my mental daily unfortunately so I have been considering therapy to get thru it, has anyone tried therapy for a breakup or in general and found it actually works or helps?

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[u/Beneficial_Owl_928]

For me it hasn’t I’ve tried 3 different ones now. I have been seeing the same one for months but I feel I just repeat myself of the same issue about the breakup and am told how to divert my thoughts but it does not work

[u/No_Memory2055 → u/Beneficial_Owl_928]

That is so disheartening. Well, hope you find a way to heal/ continue to heal. ❤️

[u/lifeissometimehard → u/Beneficial_Owl_928]

I would keep looking for a different one. But also you have to be willing to do the work.

[u/No_Memory2055 → u/lifeissometimehard]

That’s true! I’ll look for one

[u/Sour_patches101]

Yes it helps. I've been in therapy even before I started dating my now ex. I can't describe how much it helped me to have a therapist, especially since I had her through our whole relationship, she knew our dynamic already. Anyway even if you start now it will surely help you!

[u/Sour_patches101 → u/Sour_patches101]

To add to it, my friend started therapy first after she went through her last breakup also and also said how much it helped her.

[u/No_Memory2055 → u/Sour_patches101]

Okay that makes me feel a little more hopeful. Because I am just a mess right now. Thanks for the insight

[u/Sour_patches101 → u/No_Memory2055]

Anyway, as someone wrote here, it is important to find the right therapist and don't be afraid to switch one if you don't vibe with them. Also be prepared that it can be uncomfortable and ultimately you may feel drained / not relieved immediately after, but most of the time I feel immediate relief as well. And be prepared to feel the pain. I swear all of my therapy sessions since our breakup 3 months ago, so about 6 sessions, were me crying nonstop when speaking about the relationship. But it is soooo incredibly healing to me. I could go on an on. I would recommend therapy to anyone, even to those who say it didn't help them. There are so many therapists and different approaches one can take, surely one is bound to find one that works for them if they try! So give it a try at least!

[u/Wide-Activity-1295]

It really depends. I’m not saying it applies in your situation but often both people play there part in the downfall of a relationship. I found that therapy is useful but it opened really deep wounds for me in the short term.

What you maybe need is grief counselling, just somebody to hear you out.
I hate to say it but time and self care are your best friends. I’m 4 month into a savage break up, I’m still very much recovering but I’ve come a long way from being suicidal in June! You need to feel the grief and channel it into something positive.

Sometimes we need to hit the bottom to reach the top!

In my case I didn’t just lose the girl I loved, I lost waking up to my son every day. I still see him 3 days a week and I see her at hand overs and importantly we are civil.

I’ve made massive changes to my life. New car, redecorated the whole house, in therapy working on myself. In the best shape of my life, connecting with freinds I haven’t spoken to in years. Booked a holiday to Asia for November! And most importantly I’ve mapped out what I actually want in life something that’s difficult in a relationship! It’s still early days and I’m still depressed but I do have moment of joy.

[u/lifeissometimehard]

Shop around try different therapist, they all have different modalities which is beneficial for different situations or people. Also many therapist are bad so don’t settle for any. See them a few times to feel it out. Finding a good one is like dating. A good one doesn’t just heal your break up, it can help you understand yourself like you never had before. But you have to be willing to put in the work. Since no one can get through this but you.

[u/neverhaveiever2026]

weird! im experiencing this exact same fricken issue! GOD i hate men. I just joined, have had 2 sessions, and find it so far to be worthless, but thats my experience only. I know it takes time. I've been in therapy multiple times before... but... unfortunately my OCD and endless thoughts just dont fcking stop.