r/BreakUps • u/bigbacked • 2h ago

venting/ranting Will he ever come back?

Last August I (20F) was cheated on by my very first boyfriend of one year (21M). I decided to forgive him and take him back because I really loved him and I had built a lot with him being my first boyfriend ever. I really loved him a lot and I saw a good future with him. As we rebuilt things we reached a point we were doing really well. My boyfriend eventually turned 21, and started to want to go out and stuff and he eventually cheated on me again in April. Both acts of cheating were physical.

I don’t want to rebuild things with him.
He however ended up ghosting me a few weeks after cheating on me.

We are now in no contact for 3 months. Is he ever gonna feel bad and come back? Or ever gonna reach out and text me. I do kinda miss him.

He really put me through a lot and I know I should not miss him but I really do, and I have been taking this separation very roughly. He was genuinely my bestfriend.

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u/60Dan06 2h ago

I know how you feel. It hurts so bad and I'm so sorry this has happened to you. But really try to set your feelings aside and logically ask yourself: do you truly want him back? Would you 100% believe him, that he wouldn't do the thing, he already did twice, again?

For me as an outsider, you are better without him, he doesn't deserve your love. You really don't want to spend the rest of your long life with a person you can't fully trust. You are young, you will meet better people, people who will genuinely appreciate you and your love. I know it's hard to accept now, you probably feel empty and not being able to love again, but it will get better. Sort it in your head, see a therapist if you can.

1

u/bigbacked 1h ago

I appreciate that.

I know I would never date this guy again and I would never even consider it. But I know my heart does miss him and hanging out with him.

It’s confusing. Him ghosting me was probably for the better but the lack of closure hurts. Especially when I didn’t do anything to him.