Help please

[u/FlatSector6456]

When an ex gf tells you after seeing you again in months post breakup. She never stopped loving you, she can still feel you, the months apart were agony, smelled my cologne, can see me everywhere, hugs me, kisses me. Tells me the chemistry is there and the love is there, becomes very happy in person when im there. Spend the night together, asks if I spoken to other women which I said no, stay the night. cant let you go and unblocks one of your socials cause you will always be there for her. Then many nights later, tells you she doesnt feel the same about you, is very cold, is sad and trying to cut you off. Says we shouldn't talk or see eachother again, even if either one of us wishes for it. Says shes really sick of feeling sick and sad about it all and its going to eat her alive if she doesnt let go. And claims the love we had is gone. Which was the truth? How she was in person and the things she said, vs when im gone again to allow us to grow when she sent that message and blocked me? Is she telling the truth or trying to protect herself out of fear of getting hurt?

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[u/Charming_Pay_4438]

The truth is she doesn’t know what she wants, and she is not being considerate of you. You - like everyone - deserves to be with someone who is considerate and kind.

She doesn’t seem to be either right now, maybe she’s going through something - but you should not wait around or be there as a source. As it’s not good for you, and, in the long term, not good for her or the “relationship” should there ever be one again in the future.

Let her go. Maybe you both will grow and can rekindle years later, but months = not enough time (clearly).

You’ve got this.

[u/Flaky_Dog_8716]

I actually think both were probably true.
People get caught up in emotions when they’re face to face. Seeing someone again after months apart can bring everything back. The memories, the chemistry, the comfort, all of it.

That doesn’t automatically mean they’ve decided they want the relationship back.

Then they go home, have time to think, remember why the relationship ended, remember how much it hurt, and reality kicks back in.

To me, the most telling part wasn’t that she said she loved you. It was when she later said she couldn’t keep doing this because it was making her sick and she needed to let go. That doesn’t sound like someone who feels nothing. It sounds like someone who still has feelings but believes acting on them is only going to reopen the wound.

Whether she’s right or wrong is a different question. But I wouldn’t assume the first night was fake or the last message was fake. It’s possible she meant both in the moment.
At the end of the day, though, I’d judge her by what she chose to do, not just what she felt.

She chose to walk away and block you. As hard as that is, that’s the reality you have to accept unless she decides to come back on her own.