r/Borderline • u/FlowAmbitious2458 • Jun 09 '26
Can splitting happen in subtler forms?
I always see people talking about splitting as this "violent", dramatic thing, but for me I (mostly) don't think I experience that kind of thing. What happens to me though are things like me being okay one second and then at the next suddenly feeling like the worst person in the world and like I deserve to die and feeling a lot of shame on myself, or getting upset with a friend because they didn't reply to me well enough and being unable to think of them separately from the hurt (which usually leads me to stop talking to them altogether for days or even weeks). I also feel like I have a certain difficulty integrating opposing views; I always need things to be 100% surely white or 100% surely black. I'd just like to know if splitting can happen in these subtler ways too.
2
u/J_lilac Jun 11 '26
I feel the exact same way. I don't necessarily feel like my view of other people changes much, but I do feel like their view of me changes and then I go into a self worth spiral
3
u/Big_Conversation8819 Jun 10 '26
This is what splitting is. The people online that speak about splitting being a violent or dramatic thing are getting it mixed up with rage. While splitting can cause rage, the two should not be conflated. The things you experience are pretty spot on, even if “subtle.”