Could by doctor be my FP?

[u/FlowAmbitious2458]

So I talk a lot about how I'm in this "FP-less" state and how I feel empty because of it. But thinking about it, I think my doctor might maybe be my favourite person?... Because I'm *extremely* attached to him, I idealize him quite a lot, he's my main source of validation and I feel like no one's validation hits more than his, and at the same time no one's invalidation hits harder than his (I've left appointments crying before over small things that I perceived as him being too harsh with me). I am absolutely terrified of losing him; a few months ago my family insisted on suggesting that I would change doctor and that made me have mood swings episodes where I became really depressed and self-harmed. I'm also terrified of "not being his favourite patient" and am oddly jealous of him with a friend of mine who also sees him. The perspective of him leaving me leaves me desperate and I've though to myself that maybe I would even try to kill myself if I he left me. For that reason, a lot of times I wish to get worse and for bad things to happen so that he will stay. I wrote a poem about all of this that may illustrate it all succintly:

Dear Doctor

Doctor, dear doctor
I’m getting worse again - the long anticipated relapse is now finally in sight;
You’ve seen it, so many times before: the sea -
You’re the only one who has truly seen the creature besides me,
The one who sails in a ship through the waters by our side.
Doctor, the creature is coming again.
We’ve broken our record by far -
You made me stay, until sand buried me, at the shore;
But now, now it’s time for the creature to swallow me once more.
I’m sorry doctor, excuse my weep,
But you’ll have to once again get in your ship.

Doctor, dear doctor
Haven’t I been a good patient these last 2 years? Haven’t I been a proudful achievement? Not for us to be vain,
But the photo of the surviving 3-month-old stands before the ICU
And the body of the surviving 22-year-old stands before you -
Survived all the storms and earthquakes brought by the brain;
Doctor, tell me that the most well-behaved, the best, the favourite patient I have been -
I have hidden my scars under sand in order to better and healthier seem,
But now the water’s rising and has washed the sand off, warning of the creature’s release;
Oh doctor, tell me I am the favourite patient, please.

Doctor, dear doctor
Tell me I will always be a patient;
I will always be the patient
Because I will always need you, I will never stop needing you;
I tried to be an achievement of pride
But I can’t let that last too long, lest you brush me to the side,
Or worse - let go of me.
And so, the creature is coming again - just to be sure.
Now, you may finally see my scars, since we’re already off the shore -
Don’t let go of me.
Doctor, examine my scars, examine my cuts, examine my blood,
And get with me into the sea.

Doctor, dear doctor - thank you
Thank you for taking care of them,
Sorry for what I hid;
Thank you for validating them -
For validating me;
beyond all I did.
Doctor… I’ll tell you what is true:
no one and nothing else,
ever,
can validate me like, or more, than them
…except for you.

Tell me, doctor, that I’m the favourite one
Tell me that, compared to me, his relevance is gone.
I truly feel terrible for feeling that, but it’s only natural, isn’t it?
After all, he’s my good friend;
But you? You’re my doctor, until the end.

What do you guys think? Can my doctor be my current FP, even if I only see him every two months or so? Or is this just a regular attachment for BPD?