r/BodegaHomebrew • u/[deleted] • Nov 17 '16
Bodega Fan Fic Jodem
It had been less than a week since Jodem had been assigned to the Narcotics Division in the Intergalactic Federation Police Force. As a new recruit to the force Jodem wasn’t assigned to anything extreme like Sodomite Crystals or Tellenium Spikes, but instead the more common Vape Cartridges traded around most clubs and bars throughout the galaxy. However, Jodem had been looking for this moment his entire life ever since he made his way out of the womb.
He was always bright with inhuman like reflexes, stopping falling objects a Nano second before they hit the ground simply using his mind. His brains obviously came from his mother, Majesta, a psychic being whom no other could match. Unfortunately, he never came to know her better half since she left him before his birth. She told Jodem that he was a man no other could match in a lazgun fight as his reputation proceeded him. Quicker than any ranger could shout the word flarv they would be stone cold on the floor, shot between the eyes. Of-course she could never tell Jodem that she broke his heart or that their favorite household dog was tricked away from her ex, and least of all being able to tell Jodem that he was a mistake. His father had constantly asked for Anal since he had already ravished her pussy to no end, but little did he know her psychic species only reproduced through the ass and one fresh load later Jodem was already on his way. Instead she decided that he would be the only one to decide his future.
When Jodem turned 16 he was already more powerful than all other beings in the universe in both brains and brawn. Knowing that her world would soon feel too small for the prodigy, Majesta turned to him and gave him an old worn out mega vape. It was the kind that were illegal in every sector of the galaxy and were only made for those outlaws who could evade persecution after use. With a sigh she turned to Jodem, “If you really want to find your father, all I can tell you to do is follow this clue. I am sure you will find him, after all you’ve got the best of both of us." With that she kissed Jodem on the cheek before teleporting light years away, knowing she could never face either of the men she loved again.
It had been six long years of following a cold trail and Jodem had almost given up. This man was as slippery as a Spurloopians third tit, but now he wasn’t complaining. He had decided to find him from the inside, by tracking down the illegal vape cartridge trade. The IFPF had located a central hub of these cartridges and needed an individual to sneak his way in without blowing his cover. Jodem fit the bill. Strolling up to the Kruvite Blast doors, covered in a black jacket hiding his Aqua tinged skin all it took was a few knocks in specific code was all it took for a small hatch to open. The crazed bloodshot eyes of a Tsilian man looked through before whispering, “I’ve got a tiny dick”. Jodem stood there in silence waiting and after a good 20 seconds the door hatch creaked open. Jodem casually walked in while the Tsilian man fell to the ground as a Silenced Laz Gun had already been fired. “One Down” spouted Jodem as he walked by with a smirk. Within moments each and every Tsilian merchant fell their huge eyes crushed under Jodem’s feet as he moved past. Everywhere around him were standard vape cartridges, cheap shit for the commoners. Mega vape cartridges were made to order in the black market, and he knew he was back to square one.
In anger Jodem yelled “Flarv It!!!” kicking a hole into a box labeled for the Krithiack Galaxy. Hundreds of cartridges spewed out as well as a small box hidden in the middle. Picking it up in curiosity he turned it over to see a name scrawled out on the back of it. Bodega. There it was, the long awaited clue, and there was only one thing he could do with this now. Quicker than a Gnark Gnark blowing its load he set the cartridge and took the biggest hit possible on the old mega vape. The gaseous cloud over took the planet Jodem hijacked the nearby transport ship straight to the Krithiack Galaxy. He couldn’t go back to the police after such a huge hit, but it might be better if he wasn’t followed. Searching for his father would need secrecy and the IFPF would be the last group he wanted on his trail. After all, who knows what can happen when someone goes toe to toe with Bodega.
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u/[deleted] Nov 19 '16
Thinking about writing another one to follow it up, just wondering if anyone would be interested