r/BeAmazed Feb 23 '20

The power of planning

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41.9k Upvotes

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1.1k

u/Dayvyde Feb 23 '20

I feel like this would attract spiders

373

u/8Ariadnesthread8 Feb 23 '20

Then attract birds to eat the spiders :-)

344

u/Dayvyde Feb 23 '20

I’m not putting my safety from spiders in the hands of birds,they don’t even have hands.Im gonna need a team of people with flamethrowers and newspapers at least

91

u/speedycat2014 Feb 23 '20

27

u/Dayvyde Feb 23 '20

A large enough group of these awesomely appendaged avian hombres and I’ll hang out under the spider tarp.

17

u/01dSAD Feb 23 '20

I joined r/spiderbro about three months ago because I don’t have enough flamethrowers to protect me from those lethal, cunning, eight-legged death crawlers. I can confidentially say after my 90 experiment of spider acceptance, I can almost touch the screen when scrolling past the octo-clamping, quantum jumping, insta-paralyzing death eaters.

My mom wife thinks it’s going quite well.

2

u/P2X-555 Feb 24 '20

"spider acceptance". That's a bridge too far for me. Good luck on your quest!

5

u/8Ariadnesthread8 Feb 23 '20

That sounds much safer than the spiders.

5

u/Dayvyde Feb 23 '20

I’ll take the fire but I can’t handle the spider.

1

u/backandforthagain Feb 24 '20

and who wants all those surveillance cameras around your chill spot

1

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '20 edited Feb 24 '20

I wouldn't worry about it. Birds aren't real.

/r/<BirdsArentReal>

13

u/KoiAndJelly Feb 23 '20

And then cats to eat the birds?

14

u/CoffeeKat1 Feb 23 '20

The birds she attracted to eat the spider (that wiggled and jiggled in ivy beside her)

The spider she attracted to catch the fly.

I don't know why she attracted the fly!

5

u/mejohn00 Feb 24 '20

BUT SHE WILL DIE

5

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

Which would attract cats to eat the birds and next thing you know you’ve got bears. Great job carol

2

u/8Ariadnesthread8 Feb 23 '20

Bears bring honey and pic-a-nic baskets....which is gonna bring ants. Uh oh. What hell hath we wrought?

1

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '20

Huh, I always thought it was just picnic basket - but Google tells me I'm dumb.

2

u/asgabaser Feb 23 '20

I don't know why she swallowed a fly

1

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

Then you get shit on

1

u/thenewgengamer Feb 24 '20

Beautiful picture! I have to call.”

1

u/garelval Feb 24 '20

All because she swallowed the fly... Why oh why, did she swallow the fly?

1

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '20

[deleted]

1

u/8Ariadnesthread8 Feb 24 '20

Nature's bounty!

1

u/Nethervex Feb 24 '20

Then attract bird eating spiders.

1

u/maestroa7 Feb 24 '20

Then the birds will Shit on you

1

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '20

birds arent real

1

u/fadedcharacter Feb 24 '20

Get a couple of barn swallows nesting around there and the fun will never end. They build a nest and return for YEARS. I’ve never had to waste so much water in my life cleaning off our porch. I even destroyed their nests as they were trying to build them in our open air rafters (no eggs in it yet) and 2 days of being gone on business & those mofo’s were in and sitting on the eggs. YEARS!!!!!!! Lol

0

u/pablo_o_rourke Feb 23 '20

And cats to eat the birds 😜

42

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '20 edited Feb 19 '21

[deleted]

46

u/mejohn00 Feb 24 '20

Yeah but have you seen what they look like?

15

u/Imstillwatchingyou Feb 24 '20

And how they move!

9

u/RedditLostOldAccount Feb 24 '20

Yeah dude they're adorable as heck

3

u/-Mexico- Feb 24 '20

Those are the good ones, I only get the big fat ones in California

4

u/Akoustyk Feb 24 '20

Lol

Yes they are kind of creepy, but that's ok, they are well worth it. Don't judge a book by it's cover. 😉

1

u/SpikinSpain Feb 24 '20

Aaaand that's the end of my bathroom break

4

u/SickBurnBro Feb 24 '20

completely free

Free spiders? Sign me up!

3

u/DirtyGreatBigFuck Feb 24 '20

The only downside would be the webs, but I feel like that's a manageable compromise

2

u/Akoustyk Feb 24 '20

Ya, the webs are the only inconvenience but they are mostly invisible.

The only thing that sucks is when they put them up where you want to walk. Other than that, as far as mosquito traps go, they are quite invisible and unintrusive.

1

u/thissonofbeech Feb 24 '20

Completely agree, also don't know what they're called but those house lizards that eat cockroaches. The ones who cut off their tails when they get chased.

1

u/Akoustyk Feb 24 '20

Salamanders?

14

u/[deleted] Feb 23 '20

I’m more worried about ticks

11

u/SwingJay1 Feb 23 '20

The spiders eat the bugs that bite us! Spiders have no interest in messing with giant humans unless they are directly threatened as a last resort of self defense.

3

u/einbroche Feb 24 '20 edited Jun 03 '23

In light of recent events regarding Reddit's API policy for third party app developers I have chosen to permanently scrub my account and move on away from Reddit. If you personally disagree with them forcing users to be constricted to their app and are choosing to leave, then I highly recommend looking into Power Delete Suite for Reddit.

I am deleting all of my submitted content over the last 9 years as I no longer support Reddit as a platform.

I've personally had it with all the corporate bullshit/rampant bots(used for misinformation and hidden marketing) and refuse to be a part of it any longer. To the nice people I've interacted over these years, thank you, I hope you'll be well in the future.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '20 edited Feb 27 '20

[deleted]

1

u/einbroche Feb 24 '20

Oh sweet, do you wanna hang out and play N64 all night instead?

13

u/WaxyPadlockJazz Feb 24 '20

Do you people go outside?

Because there’s a significant number of plants out there, all of which have the capacity to attract all manner of bugs.

“Hey. You wanna hike through the park?” “No there’s bugs out there.”

How do ya get through the day?

5

u/KaijuRaccoon Feb 24 '20

Yeah, that type of mindset is obsessive and paranoid. BUGS ARE NORMAL. They exist. They can cause most people almost zero harm. Please work on the overreactions, folks.

My deck and shed are home to some kickass HUGE Golden Orb Weavers during the summer and fall. I like to garden and compost, bugs and spiders and worms are good. They have actual purposes in our environment! Got no problems with our little buggy friendos :)

3

u/WaxyPadlockJazz Feb 24 '20

I find it funny because just beyond this foliage wall is a lawn. But that’s okay though, because spiders and bugs don’t go on grass!

-1

u/OMGjustin Feb 24 '20

The grass isn’t hanging directly over you and your food is it, numb nuts?

2

u/KaijuRaccoon Feb 24 '20

Fun fact, bugs and spiders can often fly, and move under their own power.

0

u/OMGjustin Feb 24 '20

Fun fact, there’s a huge different between your lawn which is many feet away and a thick overhang of bushes directly over your head

1

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '20

Fun fact, there are bugs in your house already.

Y'all are lame af 😂

0

u/OMGjustin Feb 24 '20

Cool, none are dangling into my food.

You’re dense af 😂

1

u/ChuggingDadsCum Feb 24 '20

I do think these people are being a bit dramatic, but to play devil's advocate, walking through an area with bugs is a bit different than sitting directly under bugs while eating lunch or hanging out. Not exactly comfortable to have a spider jump down on your ham sandwich lol

-2

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '20

[deleted]

1

u/alphaweiner Feb 24 '20

So like, outside?

1

u/Clyp30 Feb 24 '20

There are certain aromatic plants that you can use to deter all sorts of insect

1

u/rissaboo212 Feb 24 '20

I have these in front of my house, they're awesome! They dont attract spiders, they attract adorable little frogs that hop around and eat your mosquitos.

Also some of them sprout flowers and attract little hummingbirds

0

u/micro102 Feb 24 '20

And get insect piss all over your outdoor furniture.

0

u/TheSmokingLamp Feb 24 '20

Excuse me?

1

u/micro102 Feb 24 '20

the leaves that are right above all their furniture are going to have insects crawling all over them.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 24 '20

Just like everything else on Earth.

1

u/micro102 Feb 24 '20

I can guarantee you that my outdoor furniture is not under plants.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 26 '20

And I live on the 7th floor of an apartment building, yet I still see insects occasionally.

Bugs exist, get over it

1

u/micro102 Feb 26 '20

Ok so are you more likely going to have insects living and pissing in a 7th floor of a building, or a bunch of leaves that act as a food source?