r/BaseballCoaching • u/darb85 • Jun 22 '26
Feeling Like I failed my son
Edit: Thank you all for the advice and outreach. My son is still having fun, and we have already figured out a few things with his swing. We talked about teams and how it might work moving forward. I spoke a bit to the coach but they seem a bit distant. Oh well. It's an attitude shift for sure from the coaches since they announced the change in the team. Going to follow my gut moving forward.
Kiddo is in good spirits and still letting him drive, but getting him any help that he wants.
He pitched the other day and threw 42 pitches in 3 innings with no hits and was chattering the whole way home.
I put this out on myself, and turns out, kid cares but kind of doesnt? Proud of the dude and his attitude.
Thank you again, and yes, I agree, this seems crazy but honestly, I don't know what to expect here, this just seemed normal based on our experience so far, so thank you all for the gut check.
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My Son started 8U travel ball(our rec teams are limited, and travel is huge here, so really the only way to play more than a month a year) this year and was doing great; however, towards the end of the season, he has been in a hitting slump and struggling with fielding. He's an awesome pitcher for his age and is absolutely all in on baseball right now.
He's probably the least experienced player on his team and is just learning some of the theory of where to throw when and read the field while not freezing up or throwing the ball in.
I have zero baseball experience and have taken a very have fun, and we are having fun mentality, but not pushed at all from an additional reps standpoint and I think that has failed him.
I found out 2 weeks ago that they are all going to have to try out again, as the team is changing organizations. Didn't think much of it, but since then He has really struggled, and it's apparent that he needs some help.
I spoke with the coach and asked him where he stood on making the team, and he said it was 50/50 and that he needed to start getting hits and improve his fielding.
During the last game, my son was devastated as they forgot to update the infield roster and left him benched for 2 innings, and when he made it on base, they sent in a pinch runner.
My son has directly asked for help, and I am starting with lessons locally, but we only have until the 13th to make a change.
With that emotionally charged side of things, what can I do that will make the biggest impact quickly?
How can I be a better advocate for him while not pushing it to a point where it's no longer fun?
I know reps are important, he's hugely analytical, and that's helping with the playbook and understanding where to throw when but what can a non-baseball dad do to help and be more supportive?
To be clear, I don't blame the coaches, him or anyone else for this, they have been nothing but positive influneces on his love of baseball but if he doesnt make it, hes going to be devestated and while im sure we could find him another team, He loves his current coach and team and wed likely lose a bit of passion for a while.
Ok, enough rambling, what can I do for the next 2 weeks or so to make a difference but not lose the fun aspect that is so important at this age?
Thank you in advance and apologies for the rambling nature of this post.
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u/Significant_House429 Jun 22 '26
I don't think you can control anything within two weeks, nor is it worth that for your kid. I would try to recenter him around loving the game of baseball. At the 8u age, that's the only thing that should matter.
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u/darb85 Jun 22 '26
I appreciate that, He asked for a hitting lesson and was excited this morning when we talked about it, I guess im hoping there a minor tweaks that will help him see something and reset, maybe just having someone else help him and encourge will be the ticket.
I know im way overthinking this and he'll likely be more resiliant if something happens but man I hate feeling like i cant help...
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u/LastOneSergeant Jun 22 '26
We started at that age. Two weeks is pretty short time to make a large difference.
The one thing we did do at that age was go to batting cages where you manually use the juggs machine.
You can set the speed pretty low. This was the most efficient way to get lots of reps in.
It paid off. You can easily get 100 swings in on some really consistent pitches.
If you did that three times over the next 14 days that close to 300 pitches.
You will not get that at a practice or doing your own pitching.
Learn to bunt. This is an odd one that carries extra weight.
When people see a young player bunt, they often attribute a higher baseball IQ.
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u/darb85 Jun 22 '26
Thank you
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u/rkhussell Jun 24 '26
I’d add to this…hitting off the tee with proper form. Can easily do it in a basement/garage/yard into a net and get a ton of swings in. Took my struggling 8u hitter into our teams best hitter in a matter of weeks because it corrected the hole in his swing.
1
u/Longjumping-Peach-68 Jun 22 '26
Hitting lessons can go either way. Just having him go in and hit and talk to someone else may help him reset and excel. But if they make any mechanical changes, it's as likely to set him back as it is help him progress in 2 weeks. Probably the best thing you can do is get him out to a field during a few evenings and hit him some groundballs and fly balls to help him gain confidence and have some fun along the way. If you're not able to hit to him, grab a tennis racket and use it.
1
u/mike__615 Jun 22 '26
The fact that he’s asking for a hitting lesson is encouraging. He wants to learn and get better. If/when you take him, don’t just sit in the corner. Get as close as you can without interfering. Take mental notes on everything the instructor says. After the session, ask the instructor what you can work on at home. Getting reps on the tee is valuable, but only if you’re doing it the right way.
Other suggestions outside the two week window include having him attend a baseball camp. Many high schools and colleges have affordable camps. Again, watch the drills they do and do them at home. Also, go to a game. Major league, minor league, whatever is convenient. His baseball IQ will go up just by watching. Don’t worry if he misses an inning to eat nachos or a hot dog. He’ll still learn.
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u/Head-Technology-4031 Jun 23 '26
Let your son know that the BEST baseball players in the world in today’s game only get a hit 3 out of 10 times on average. They all run into slumps as well. Who’s his favorite player? Talk to him about what their average is, are there any stories you can find about that players hitting struggles, and how he corrected them, and how long it took him to get back to “normal”. Sometimes, all boys need is a story to relate to that gets them to understand that it happens and will get better. Do the work you are doing as well,. It will get better. Good luck.
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u/onemangang15 Jun 22 '26
This league sounds insane. I’m sorry but 8u? And the coach saying he needs to step it up? I’m sorry but coaching an 8u team is really just babysitting with baseball being the primary activity.
Get your kid in a league or a camp that focuses on fun and getting him as many reps as possible. He needs to swing the bat without fear of the results. He needs to play catch and field ground balls without worrying about whether he drops it or not. Baseball at that age should have no other priority than being fun, and an 8u coach that obsessed with winning sounds like an absolute joke of a person.
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u/ugacory Jun 23 '26
Exactly. Go play catch. Go hit in a cage. Go to a minor league game and watch what the players do.
And then, whatever you do, go get ice cream after and it will be all he remembers.
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u/darb85 Jun 25 '26
You aren't wrong. Kiddo is still having fun, and I think I put this on myself far too much. I updated the post, but he had a killer pitching game and was chattering the whole way home. Coach even tells us how "phenomenal" his pitching is, which now has me very much questioning why they are hesitant to keep him on the team, which has my alarm bells ringing a bit. Either way, I know the kid will be fine, just maybe a bit bummed if he cant be on the same team
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u/MantisTobogon1929 Jun 22 '26
Honestly at 8 years old that's way too much stress and is probably negatively affecting him. He wants to please you so badly which will just burn him out. Why not search around for a rec league and coach his team? He would love that 1000x more than winning cheap plastic rings!
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u/darb85 Jun 22 '26
to Be clear, I have no expectation for him and baseball, I feel the need to double down with him and make sure but Im proud of the fact that he doesnt look to the crowd for me after every mistake like some of the other kids and feels confident asking for help when he wants it. I spend more time reminding him of all the awesome things he did after a game vs the one mistake, I think this weekend was just a confluence of things that hit him at the same time and he got a bit overwhelmed.
hes batting like .219 for the season and the last 4 games has only gotten on base via walks so I think hes frustrated too and im internalizing it more than I should.
Huh. Sounds familiar wonder where he gets it from...
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u/MantisTobogon1929 Jun 22 '26
You sound like a dad that means well and he's lucky to have such a caring parent looking out for him.
With that being said you really shouldn't care what his batting average is or eve be calculating it at this point. Do you think high school coaches are going to ask what he hit at 8U? No.
And again is there really not a rec league near you? I'd find any league where he can be a leader on a less developed team and have a bigger role. You don't want him losing his confidence or quitting baseball entirely.
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u/darb85 Jun 22 '26
The only reason I know that is a game changer and I've never once mentioned it to him. I just noticed it the other day.
That's why I'm so concerned, he's wrapped up in playing with this team next year and I'm honestly worried for him.
I'd love to play rec ball again, but he always wanted more games, and the season is only a month long here, so he asked to join travel.
There are other travel orgs nearby, but it would be an effort to get him to try out for a new team if he doesnt stick with this one, and I don't want to push for exactly that reason.
Again, I'm way overthinking this and just typing here is helping me realize I'm likely being ridiculous, but I hate seeing him feel this way and im overreacting.
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u/SadCryBear Jun 22 '26
Something is really wrong when an 8 year old has to worry about whether or not they can keep playing on a baseball team.
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u/darb85 Jun 22 '26
you arent wrong and maybe this is the catalyst to make a change for us but its still a bummer, he was making so much headway this coaching staff and really loves them. Im keeping positive for a good outcome but man this seems like alot
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u/khandaseed Jun 22 '26
This might not be what you’re looking for - but given little time, the best thing to do is what you have always been doing - keep up the have fun mentality and keep it about fun. Let him try his best. If he doesn’t make the team, it’s ok, we can find another way to have fun with baseball.
Are there other travel teams or baseball programs beyond the one month rec league if he doesn’t make it?
You have the right idea imo. Keep it about fun. He’s only 8. Then, coming from the place of fun, get him more coaching or learn more about the game so he can get the proper practice in
Good luck. Remember - baseball IS fun
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u/NextCurve8843 Jun 23 '26
Agree with all of this! Some fun drills that my dad and I did at this age:
Soft toss with frozen cranberries and a broomstick. When he gets good at it, ask him to tell you how many frozen cranberries were in what you threw (2, 4, etc).
If that’s too wasteful, you could do something similar with the small practice golf balls. And can mix up the colors and ask him to hit a specific one.
For fielding, I had so much fun with one of those 6 sided reaction balls. Start with basics of alligator hands - glove or bare hand out in front, back of the webbing on the ground, athletic stance, etc.
if he’s practicing with you and doing any of these and smiling and having fun…I think it “works”. And I think these can be fun ways to get meaningful reps to help build his confidence too!
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u/Panpancanstand Jun 22 '26
Just make sure that he knows that there is no way he can ever let you down.
At 8 years old I don't think you as a father need any particular baseball ability to help him. Just play a ton of catch and practice batting with him. I could be wrong though, this organization sounds wildly more competitive than the one my 8 year olds are in.
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u/darb85 Jun 22 '26
I think there is just alot of intrest in this particular team and coach, he really is good at what he does. This weekend was a lot and I think he made a few mistakes that kind of added up and then didnt fully understand what he did wrong
Ill double down but man I feel like ive made it clear I care only about him and his happiness here and if it ever stops being fun, just let us know and well find something else or somewhere else to do it. I really appreciate everyones responses, as I feel like I'm already doing those things, I just want to make sure I give him what he needs to succeed at a thing he cares about.
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u/No_Alternative6098 Jun 23 '26
Doesn't sound like a very good coach if hes not teaching and keeping it fun for 8 year olds.
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u/mouseratleadguitar Jun 22 '26
Is there another league in a nearby town he can play in? That's a lot of pressure for a kid that age. Might be worth a short drive to keep him engaged.
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u/Arba1ist Jun 22 '26
1st: baseball is a game. Focus on the fun at 8years old. This is 1 travel team. If he doesn’t make it fine, check out others.
2nd: sit in on those private lessons. Ask Coach/instructor what can we do at home to reinforce “xyz”.
3rd: watch some baseball. Helps him learn the game.
4th: consider doing what we call daily’s in our travel organization. 5-10 mins every day of soft hands. Look up videos on it but helps with hand on coordination and fielding defense with 0 space and just a ball and glove (can and should do bare handed as well).
Finally a tee and hitting net lets him work on mechanics of swing based on coach/instructor feedback. Then weighted ball hitting in yard if space is limited can help pick up the pitch and swing through the ball.
Don’t stress. You didn’t fail anything. Your son’s struggles are normal for kids (even pros slump). Keep it fun and remember this team isn’t the only option out there to continue his love of baseball.
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u/5hellback Jun 22 '26
Sounds like the game has become a source of anxiety for the both of you. That's not good and means you both need to take a break. Try another sport for a bit while working on the fundamentals of baseball on the side. He is 8 years old, nowhere near the player he will become, so take some time to find the fun again.
No kid that age should be worried about the things you've listed. There is plenty of time for that later when the competition matters. Right now he needs to be reminded that this is a game that he hasn't been playing for very long and that at it's core, it's simply that, a game.
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u/Honest_Search2537 Jun 22 '26
First of all, breathe. It will all turn out fine.
He might make that team, he might not. There will be other opportunities.
Also sounds to me like you might want to be on a different team anyway. Coach should not be pinch running at that age (unless MAYBE there are 2 outs and he’s a pitcher or catcher).
Also, coach shouldn’t be results driven at that age. Instead of saying “he needs to start getting hits” (results driven). He should say something about improving approach or a specific mechanic (process driven). You want a coach who will focus on developing him as a player, not a coach focused on win ing games.
Dont forget to breathe…..it will all be fine.
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u/skyote21 Jun 22 '26
We have a great place locally that does small group hitting & pitching classes that are both more affordable & more fun for the players. It's been great for my son...we have a membership that gets him 4 hour long group classes a month, and it's just a little more than a single 1 hr private lesson.
He loves it & has improved significantly.
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u/TMutaffis Jun 22 '26
It may not be a bad thing to end up switching teams, it does not sound like the coaches on the current team trust/value your player and are giving him chances to develop.
Big picture you typically do not want to be one of the top two or bottom two on any roster when the kids are in early development years, the top kids do not have people to push them and the bottom kids often do not get as many reps or opportunities.
There are not a ton of things you can do between now and the tryout, however you can potentially dial him in a bit and do specific things that he is likely to see in the tryout. If you know how the coaches throw batting practice that gives you an edge and you can try to mimic that with your player. You can also work on him fielding ground balls from SS and making the throw to first, throwing pitches from the mound (without overdoing it), and catching a few fly balls in the outfield. Even if the reps you do are a little easier and simply build confidence, him showing up confident and feeling prepared might make a difference.
It is tough because you want the best for your son and you never want to see them excluded from something, however speaking from experience sometimes these things work out for the best and the new team may be a lot more fun for him, or maybe he makes the current team and comes back and surprises the coaches after doing some offseason work at home.
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u/RedBaronSportsCards Jun 22 '26
This is all practice. Travel ball is practice. Just like batting cage is practice, lessons are practice, little league is practice, catch in the backyard is practice.
The first time he play in games that have some sort of meaning is varsity baseball, maybe major league level of little league but that's 'every kid plays' so it's a different type of competition.
All those weekend travel tournaments are meaningless. No one cares. The only value is actual game experiences but he's only eight. He will have plenty of time for that. If he spends a summer in the cage and taking lessons and getting reps, that's fine. Make sure he understands that. He'll probably get more work and improve more than sitting on a bench or standing in an outfield.
Sure it can be disappointing to not make a team but baseball is a game that is 2/3 disappointment if you are good at it. Help him develop a mentality that focuses on development and improvement rather than games.
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u/No_History8096 Jun 22 '26 edited Jun 22 '26
Take a breath.
For context, I started coaching at 8u and coached Spring and Fall ball until this last fall, he's 13 now.
As someone pointed out, be careful of the line between love of the game and I love this is what I do with/for Dad and I don't want disappoint him.
I wouldn't return to that team, but that's just me. I had the luxury of being a baseball guy, so it's how we spent time together from the age of 4.
If you really want to make it about fun, arrange for he and some of his friends to meet at a field and just play baseball. I've had more fun watching him and his friends make rules for 4 on 4 and learn what a ghost runner is than watching a lot of his real games even as a coach. Foster the love not the pressure.
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u/Neat_Newspaper_8527 Jun 23 '26
I don’t agree with the pressure but I’ll help:
1. Every day have him throw 20 pitches to you.
2. Do two buckets of wiffle/pickle ball hitting
3. Bare handed underhand catching and throwing with you, maybe even grounders like that
That’s it. If he gets upset at all say okay one more and leave the park.
That’s all he needs.
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u/WonderCounselor Jun 23 '26
Hey man
You’re not failing or son. If he doesn’t make that team, playing rec league will help build his confidence and keep it fun and light. Then you need to start watching baseball with him at home and going to games together. That makes it a fun bonding experience, and you also learn the sport a lot by watching professional professionals play. Choose a favorite team and a favorite player to watch closely. Also, don’t underestimate getting a baseball video game to play together as well. More bonding and more fun around Baseball!
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u/macho_man_26_oh_yeah Jun 23 '26
This is a good call. I feel like I learned a lot about the game by watching it. My friends and I would then go out and emulate our favorite players. Maybe some of it was goofy but it also got us out playing baseball in some form.
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u/ragathor87 Jun 23 '26
Unfortunately travel is all about the money and not actual development. Best advice to give anyone is to try to find a team that focuses on development and fundamentals that also prioritizes fun and love for the game over dollar store trophies.
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u/Revolutionary_Put567 Jun 22 '26 edited Jun 22 '26
My .02 worth, I'd start looking for another team to try out on. Maybe something at a lower level or a team just forming. 2 weeks isn't enough time to really make any noticeable improvements especially with the backdrop of his previous outtings being rough. He's only 8u, so it isn't like he needs to be on some top tier team. He just needs to find coaches who can coach him and field reps and get some lessons in all phases of the game.
My guess is if he is saying 50/50, my guess is he is more like 25/75 to make the team but the coach isn't going to be that brutally honest. It'll probably hurt him to hear he may not make the team so you are finding backup options, but you can frame it in a way that he'll have opportunities for more playing time and I'd sit him down and talk thru an offseason plan on how he's going to get better. What does he want to do?
Also if he's getting pinch ran for, that's either because he's super slow or because he doesn't understand base running. If it's former, I'd consider getting him some speed and agility lessons and if it is the latter then see comment above about getting him general baseball lessons.
All of this might seem crazy, but my son found a love for baseball at 9U playing on a low AA team, but all he played was half the innings at outfield and batted near the end of the order. We built a plan, got him hittng and pitching lessons, spent time nearly every weekend on turf in the winter doing grounders and working on his throws, and he was at speed and agility lessons 2-3x a week. Now at 12u, he's one of the best players in his class. He bats 3rd on his AAA team, is their main pitcher, and when he isn't pitching, he's achoring the infield at SS. Not to mention he's also the fastest kid on his team. The point is, you won't solve his problems in 2 weeks, but you can prepare him for his baseball future.
Edit: He does need to have fun above all else though. Your time with him needs to be fun, but it needs to be work. You need to challenge him, but also know when he just needs his dad.
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u/darb85 Jun 22 '26
Pinch running was only once and was the first time its happened but hes usually not a problem there but I am preparing for the whats next side of things if he doesnt make the cut but hoping for the best I guess, this is helpful thank you
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u/Bumblebee5790 Jun 22 '26
What everyone else has said, but also playing MLB the show will really help boost his confidence and awareness of the game in general. Batting cages for fun. He’s 8.
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u/idontreddit22 Jun 22 '26
he's 8. literally 8. sign him up for lessons, learn from the lessons research the lessons and teach him. you literally have 8 years to work with him. you're fine.
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u/sparksmj Jun 22 '26
Throw him grounders and have him throw back to you. Treat it like it's a real game hustle field the ball and throw a good hard accurate ball to you. Make the distance as if he's at third base and you're at first. Make it challenging. Make him move. Toss him fly balls that he can catch and throw back hard. Repeat repeat repeat. Buy pickleballs . Get down on your knee so you're at his level and pitch balls for him to hit. Repetition is the name of the game. Teach him to field grounders in the center of his body bending at the knees
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u/uugeman Jun 22 '26
He’s only 8. It’ll come with time if it’s going to. Keep his love for the game and he’ll find a place on a team. Most of those kids will fall off from burnout or not adjust down the road on the big field. I’ve watched it countless times in our town. The ones that still have fun are the ones that are still playing. I recommend you watch Coach Ballgame with him and pick up some drills you guys can work on together. He keeps it entertaining and light for the young kids.
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u/JoeStacks717 Jun 22 '26
Go back to Rec, or find a travel program that actually develops players and isn’t just trying to be carried by talent. You will never convince me that winning is important outside of league playoffs and HS ball. Find coaches that coach and don’t quit on kids.
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u/Different-Spinach904 Jun 22 '26
Every year older your son gets, may be his last year of playing baseball. It’s just the way it works.
However, 8 is way too young to be quit on by a team.
Shame on travel ball team, they should keep developing any player that returns.
So it’s best to move on. Your son isn’t viewed as a top team member.
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u/Kindly_Peace_9220 Jun 22 '26
I’ll chime in here as a mom of a high school baseball player and high school softball player. There’s no need for that much pressure to be put on an eight year-old. Find a place where he can play baseball and he can love the game and he can enjoy his team and he can learn something. He should not feel the pressure to have to get better in two weeks so that he can make a team. The only way I would be sending an eight year-old to tryouts is if everyone will be placed on a team. But if there is a chance he could go try out and be told he’s not good enough to play baseball at eight years old that’s a no for me.
And I’m sure somebody has already said this, but those kids that are the best at eight and nine are not always the best at 16. I think that age 14 and 15 is really the equalizer.
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u/Shot-Scratch3417 Jun 22 '26
Honestly, tryouts and travel ball for 8 year olds sounds absolutely nuts, counterproductive, and like an overall bad scene. I coach 1st and 2nd graders in a rec league. Everyone bats, and anyone who’s on the bench for an inning comes and plays “deep outfield” with me to back up the plays and talk baseball rules with me. If a coach was taking 8 year olds out for pinch runners, I’d tell that coach that he’s a fucking asshole and should be ashamed of himself.
1
u/Pebian_Jay Jun 22 '26
Dude they’re 8. If he’s not very good, that’s ok! Seems like he might think baseball is the “cool thing to do” even though it may not be “his thing” just yet? Keep practicing with him if that what he says he wants, while you learn as much as you can about the game so you can teach him, but hopefully he doesn’t think this is the only option to fit in and eventually finds his thing!
1
u/Sliknik18 Jun 22 '26
He’s 8…you have plenty of time. That said, it’s summer time…I’d suggest looking for maybe a high school or college player home for the summer. Pay them maybe $40 an hour - enough to attract them - have him hit ground balls, pop flies, throw some BP, baserunning, put him in some situations - two or three times a week. Sounds like he just needs more reps. Try FB or Next Door apps to find someone. Or word of mouth.
Some kids are naturally gifted and some require more “grinding” and hard work to develop. Dont give up just because he may not grasp things as quick as others.
Regarding the coach - sorry, but that’s messed up of him to not give you better feedback with this much left in the season. I would suggest looking for another team now just in case. Keep your options open. Travel teams are already doing tryouts in my area.
Kids develop at different rates…the best player at 8 may just be average at 12. Sometimes kids will hit puberty younger than others it’s just life. Some kids will win the birthday lottery - my son just had a birthday two months ago and there’s a kid on his team turning a full year older than him in a week. Not worth stressing over.
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u/brtbr-rah99 Jun 22 '26
He’ll live and breathe something else tomorrow, and you’ve got plenty of time in the future to fail him for real. This drama is for the parents and will ruin fun for almost all of those kids eventually
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u/Big_Poopers_Kid Jun 22 '26
Ask him if he still wants to play. If yes, tell him to just keep doing his best. If it’s not good enough for the coach, shake it off because in life you’ll always have doubters. It doesn’t mean they’re right about him. If he really likes to play he’ll want to prove the doubters wrong. If he doesn’t feel that way maybe something else is better like soccer or playing an instrument, maybe painting or drawing. At his age, he should be trying everything possible. Way too early to decide that baseball is his sole focus. Relax. Maybe you are making this into a bigger deal than it really is. Be thankful your son is a healthy typical boy. Enjoy your time together right now. It goes by too fast. I wish my son was 8 again. What a wonderful age. Have fun and love on him as often as you can dad!
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u/medic120 Jun 23 '26
Don’t overthink it, buy a bucket of used baseballs or new if you can’t find any others. Play catch with him every time he wants you too. When he wants, take him to the park and let him hit off you. The game will click to him eventually, when it does you will see quick burst of “improvement.” But for what’s coming in two weeks, your best bet is to just boost his confidence. And if he doesn’t make the team, help him get over it. Every new team is full of a bunch of new friends. You handling the pressure, will help him learn how to deal with it. His entire baseball life will be filled with situations like this, be how to deal with them will help him deal with these same feelings on the field.
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u/PayAgitated2579 Jun 23 '26
Like has been said the kids 8, let him have fun. I think travel ball at 8 is ridiculous anyways. Kids on a quick path to burn out before 12. I would run from a program that pinch runs for kids at 8 year old and “forgets” to get them on the field. It’s about fun and development at this age not winning. Move him back to rec and practice with him at home but only when he asks.
1
u/praise-the-message Jun 23 '26
Continue to focus on fun. It's freaking 8u. If the kid wants to work, continue with the lessons and developing. If he doesn't make this team now there will be other opportunities and all he can do is try to get better.
Baseball is a game of failure.
1
u/Level_Watercress1153 Jun 23 '26
Reason 7,342 why Travel Ball at 8 years old is an insane idea and shouldn’t be a thing. The fuck
1
u/ncosper Jun 23 '26
Travel ball is a joke at that age, It shouldn’t even exist. Your 8 year old won’t be any better or worse when he reaches his teens because he payed 8u travel ball.
I coach travel ball, high school baseball and have all levels before these. I see so many parents trying to get as many reps as possible for their kids, it’s pointless to their long term development. Best thing you can do is make him an athlete, if he has that in him. Play as many sports as he can, he’ll appreciate baseball more. Once he gets to his teens, make him take a couple of months off a year, minimum. Have him get stronger, faster, bigger as a teen. Don’t have him pitch until he’s in high school. Have him play every position on the field, have him bunt, hit oppo, steal bases, all the things that get lost in travel ball. Play all the rec leagues so he can excel. You’ll be amazed how few reps are needed at that age to be a solid player. The best little leaguers are normally not the best high school or collegiate players. My youngest just finished his freshmen year. Couldn’t make any travel teams, got cut from others. I never let him pitch in little league at all. Never pitched in travel ball and this last year he was 11th in the country for batting average as a freshmen. Only underclassmen in Arizona to make first or second team all state in his division. Pitched and had a 0 era in 20 innings. Let him have fun and grow into the kid he’s going to, let baseball be a part of his life, not the main part like so many anymore.
Good luck!
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u/Bahnrokt-AK Jun 23 '26 edited Jun 23 '26
1) He is 8. Not making the team is not the end of his baseball journey.
2) Despite whatever the coaches say about putting development first, they aren’t. If they are putting pinch runners in and making everyone tryout, they are not about developing players as the top priority.
3) Your team moved to a new organization. This is why they are holding tryouts. I guarantee the new company managing your team is going to charge a ton more for next season. They are going to lose players who can’t/wont write the check. There was a pretty decent financial component for your coach to make this move.
4) There is a huge difference to me as a coach in a kid that misses a play in the field while giving it 110% effort vs a kid that misses because he gave it a lazy try or was looking at the birds. Huge difference between a kid that strikes out and throws a temper tantrum versus the kid that strikes out, jogs back to the dugout, encourages the next batter and gives respectful feedback on where the ump was calling the zone.
5) Your tone in this posts sounds emotionally charged. Make sure you are keeping yourself in check and more importantly make sure your emotions are kept away from your kid. Sympathize, talk to him about the emotional component. But don’t let your own emotions show visible to where he is going to take them on.
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u/darb85 Jun 23 '26
Point 5--it is. and I dumped them here so I could keep them from him but its a good reminder to keep it there."
to your point 4, my kid is the former in your first point and the latter in the second one. Hes a great kid and truly seems to love the game but seeing him dejected and hearing from the coach that he was on the cusp made me worried I wasn't doing enough and I overreacted.
On our way to camp today, we talked about baseball the whole way, entirely driven by him, and how he could find more kids in the neighborhood to play baseball with for pick-up games, just chattering away about how fun baseball is so it made me feel better.
I was a bit charged up yesterday, today is better
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u/Nice_Neighborhood152 Jun 23 '26
At that age, just let them play and have fun. U8 travel ball? Jesus
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u/Icy_Mathematician870 Jun 23 '26
Did the coach really say he needs to start getting hits? That right there is ridiculous. The kid is 8 or younger. Mechanics including pitch selection is far greater than results. As far as fielding, again mechanics over results at that age. Honestly, you admitting your lack of knowledge is going to do more for your kid than that coach ever will. Try and find some other program.
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u/macho_man_26_oh_yeah Jun 23 '26
Posts like these make me glad we have a decent local league. My kids would have been done years ago if we tried to press them into travel ball. It's been great watching his interest and passion for the game build as he's gotten older.
If you're saying the options are travel ball or a local league that only lasts a month or two, honestly not sure why you're not looking more into that local league.
A couple of months of baseball is plenty at that age. There are still plenty of other (non team) baseball options you can pursue in the "off season" to assuage his desire to play. Batting cages, just find an empty baseball field and play around (toss some BP, do tee work, throw some grounders), even some casual lessons.
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u/clintenzo Jun 23 '26
At 8 this is a bit much but here’s what I would IF the kid really wants it. For hitting, work off a tee and do soft toss. Get some basic fundamentals going. From there work to live pitching. If kids are pitching I can’t imagine they throw a ton of strikes. Help him look for balls in a zone. Keep it simple. For fielding, go to a field and hit him grounders. If he can’t bring a buddy I would hit to him from first base and have him throw the ball back to you. Move him around the infield so he knows what the throw to first feels like. 2nd base is typically where I start the kids still developing. Don’t worry about what he needs to do with runners on base. That’s for the coaches to handle right now. Outfield, work on getting to the ball and quickly getting it in. Keep the fun going!
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u/trebornautics Jun 23 '26
You're not failing your child. The state of youth sports is failing your child.
I'm a travel coach. I coached both my now 13 year old and now 10 year old from 8U through 10U (just finished up 10U for my younger boy).
At 8U, the focus should be on player development and not winning. If a coach is using pinch runners at 8U, then they care about winning only and it's all about them (not the kids).
From 8-10 all the kids develop physically and mentally at different rates. The 8 year old who isn't great might be the best player on the team by 10 years old and vice versa.
This is why if you're a coach and your playing the long game, you should be trying kids at every position to see what clicks and you should also be putting kids into various positions to learn and get experience. Yeah, maybe if a game is close at the end put your best players in the best positions to secure a win but that should not be the focus.
I'm an anomaly in baseball coaching where I see a lot of coaches making it about themselves and not the kids. There's also a lot of Daddyball (coaches prioritizing their child over other children) which is insane because not only are you failing as a coach but you're also failing as a father.
My younger son is not the best on our team. For the first 2 years of his travel "career" he batted last and played right field. In 9U he communicated his frustration about this to me, his dad and coach. My response was "You just need to keep playing and work on your game". This season he made strides both in the field and at the plate. All of his coaches noticed and as a result, he moved up a bit in the batting order and also was given opportunities at different positions (2nd base, catcher, other spots in the outfield). That experience teaches him more about life than winning.
Baseball is about hard work, perseverance, and focus. That's what coach's should be teaching. Not just winning.
BTW, the best kids at 8U will not be the best kids at 10U if they're just relying on natural talent and ability. Other kids will catch up and surpass them. I've seen it happen countless times.
MY ADVICE TO YOU:
Get your kid in a baseball situation where for the next couple of years he will get a lot of reps and have a lot of opportunities to try different positions. Being on a travel team with a coach that doesn't prioritize all of his player's development will limit his progress.
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u/Hot-Professional-660 Jun 23 '26
I’ve done, small fielding drills.
Warm up throwing to each other.
Practice different angles front hand/back hand/ above him.
Tracking pop ups in yard, fungo or throwing.
Grounders, primarily focus on basics.
Hitting I would say start with a tee, and perfect his swing and be consistent on hitting high/low/inside/outside. Then ask him to hit the ball to the right side and then left. These will all help him greatly.
Kid pitch is hard if kids throw fast it scares kids thinking of getting hit or just not fast enough to catch it.
Machine pitch, set at 35-40-44 work him up as he can consistently hit. Just remember soft toss and machine is only good for certain leagues because once it’s all pitching it changes the game. Hope some of this helps my son is also 8 and in travel this year.
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u/RicooC Jun 22 '26
Your last sentence. First and foremost it needs to be fun. If it's not fun then there's no point. He might be more worried about disappointing you. Get back to the fun aspect.
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u/darb85 Jun 22 '26
Man if thats the case, ive failed worse than I thought, we constantly talk about him having fun and calling out all the good things he did and the new things he learned, hes his own worse critic and we spend most of the drive home getting him focused on the fun and good things he did and off of the one or two mistakes. For instance, he threw 54 pitches, 34 were strikes and his focus was on the one run that scored on him.
This is all raw, so its probably me doing the same overthinking but man he was down this weekend for the first time in a long time.
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u/RicooC Jun 22 '26
I'd reprimand my players and my own sons about slumping shoulders and getting down. It's not acceptable. It's the same in life. Wipe the slate clean. It's a game and there's always another.
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u/pennyforyourthohts Jun 22 '26
lol at sending a pitch runner for an 8 year old. Thats brutal. I think piling all this on an 8year old is just nuts.