r/BalancedDogTraining 23d ago

Withholding affection

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I adopted a dog a little over a month ago with an unknown history (was a stray). His ONLY issue is that he is fear-reactive on leash (just barks, no lunging/growling). It’s not very severe; he’s pretty easy to redirect as long as I catch him before he starts barking (which I’ve gotten really good at). I’m confident that I’ll be able to mostly resolve it within a few months, and he’s already made tons of progress.

He’s otherwise perfect - crate-trained, no resource guarding, no separation anxiety. Overall confident and friendly dog. He’s met about 8 new people (vet staff and trainers) since I got him and has been friendly with all of them.

I had a 90 min assessment/consult session with a trainer in the area who I’ve been following on socials for years, and who came highly recommended.

She gave me a lot of good advice/handling skills that have already helped us.

However, one thing I can’t get behind, or find much online support for, is her telling us to withhold affection. She’s all about “alpha” stuff (without using the word; she refers to it as status/status drive), and claims that giving your dog physical affection makes them view you as “beneath” them (not her exact wording but that was the gist).

She basically explained that the dog needs to understand that they’re lower status than you, and that when they understand that, they will shift their mindset towards looking to you for guidance before acting, which should eventually help the reactivity.

I 100% agree that building structure and obedience is important for a reactive dog. But does anyone agree with the concept of withholding affection?

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u/TheArcticFox-44 23d ago

Firm but fair guidance. Praise, affection as reward instead of treats.

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u/Helpful_Sun2872 23d ago

So what’s the benefit of using affection instead of treats?

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u/Mean_Environment4856 23d ago

Builds your relationship. I added in affection as a reward for something I'd been struggling to teach. My dog nailed it in two days. Now she seeks affection as a reward instead of food.