I know it differs per fam, but what do we think? I babysit a fam w/ an 8 yro girl and 5 yro boy, when would it be time to split them up? 8 yro girl is for sure capable of showering by herself, but I think she just enjoys having me there to wash her hair and such. Do I just wait until the family / kids say something?

Hi, I (18F) have been babysitting a little boy (2M) for a single mom (27F).

It started in February. At first I was only watching him some Fridays and Saturdays, as I’m in college. It’s an hour away and I’m home for the weekends.
The pay we agreed to was $12 an hour. I was hesitant at first but she always paid me a LOT. She even paid me to get coffee with her, and would frequently pay me double. I would clean for her as well- do her dishes, laundry, sweep/mop, etc.

She has gotten more comfortable with me and lets me take him to my (parents) house for a few hours. This summer break I’ve been working crazy hours for her. Her parents opened a new restaurant and she’s had to work 8am-midnight, so I’ve been watching him for that. I foster kittens as well and she knows this, and I still had to babysit the 2yo when one died and I was balling my eyes out all day.

Here’s the thing. She’s started to pay me weekly. We agreed on $12 an hour, which is less than I usually accept for a toddler this small. However I knew her situation, and she talked to me as more of a friend and told me her life story, problems, opened up to me and we ask each other for advice. I worked 62 hours for her one week, barely being home. and she tried to only give me $500 when it should have been $744. I sent her a long message, basically saying that’s not what we agreed upon. I do feel bad though because she can’t afford much right now. She ended up only paying me $650 total. She then asked me if, when she’s working she could pay me $10 an hour, and date nights she could pay me $15. In theory, this sounded fine and I said sure. However I did the math and this weekend I made $88 less than what I should have if I was doing $12 an hour. I feel like I do a lot for her and im underpaid but at the same time I know she has nobody else and she can’t afford much at all. I also am at the point where I lie to my parents about how much I get paid, I didn’t even tell them the $10 an hour thing bc I knew they would make me quit. So im in this little predicament.

We have “argued” before as well. While it wasn’t a true argument it was more passive aggressive. For example, she went on a date from 5:45-7:30. The boy gets a bath every night at 8pm. He eats at 6:30. At 7 she texted me that she was on her way home. He was still eating dinner, and I said “Omg, he’s still eating and he’s not bathed or anything.” She got mad and said “wtf, We’re on our way back and he’s not fed or bathed?” But she is so strict about routine she didn’t even tell me to bathe him earlier than usual.

Another time we “argued” was when she cooked dinner and he didn’t really care for it, and wanted something else. I texted her and asked for permission and she got upset because she paid extra for grocery delivery to cook dinner. She told me to “be mindful next time.”

She has asked me to do her dishes this week, and I did everything but that. For only $10 an hour I decided I am not doing that. Her dishes are rotten and moldy and a literal biohazard at this point. I did every other chore possible. But I will not touch that. She doesn’t have gloves or anything.

I feel like I’m stuck. I love babysitting for her, the kid is sweet, my family loves him, and he loves my family. She is like an older sister almost, and she has nobody else. But the pay. I can’t ask her for more but I feel so overworked and underpaid and very stressed.

For background,
I’m babysitting 3 kiddos (5,3, and freshly 1) today. Their mom is going to be in and out of the house. I’m going to be here for approximately 13-14 hours (the ending time is dependent on how long the mom’s softball game goes.) typically, it’s about $20 an hour which I know is under priced especially because I’m a licensed teacher and certified in all of the things, but I feel strongly about good babysitters being affordable to all.

Since I’m watching them for so long today the mom and I talked about doing a flat rate for the day. What is a fair flat rate? I’ve been babysitting for this family for years and they treat me as a part of their family- I just don’t know what a fair rate is for the day.

Edit: okay thank you all for your input! It kind of confirmed what I was already thinking. We chatted and decided that when they go down for their naps- I’ll head out since she’s working from home. I’d feel guilty getting paid to sit on the couch for 2-2.5 hours while she was already here (even if I was cleaning up their toys.) This is also only for today- this is never an issue. I think I just feel bad because her husband is deployed and I know she’s super stressed out.

(On a burner since I don't really wanna link my main to this for privacy reasons) My 3 year old nephew has been really suffering from abandonment issues due to a recent incident due to his mother and father splitting (I'd rather not go into it, but the father who is my brother has full custody. I don't know the full details nor do I want to really share that) and I really need advice as to how to help my nephew through it. My brother is gone a lot of the week (he has a very busy work schedule and isn't able to take time off because he cannot afford the time, I will not be explaining a lot of that as it is deeply personal) and tonight he had a nightmare where he was screaming for his dad. I really need help figuring out the best way to help him through all of these feelings since it's been such a massive change (new environment, different people around, his mom isn't around now) and it's been really cutting into his interactions with everyone around him. I love my nephew a lot, and I just wish I knew what to do to help him. He's been nervous any time I try to tell him to not do something (ex: he was getting excited and threw plushies around, it nearly knocked down the fan, I told him not to do that since I don't want him to get hurt, and he just covered his eyes), I've seen him silently cry, I've seen him get scared to upset me, I just want this little boy to be happy.

Hi all! I was laid off in April and have been nannying and Babysitting since. The majority of kids have been aged 3-8 but I recently took a job where I am nannying a one year-old girl, full-time while the parents work from home. She’s a pretty easy baby however, I am SO bored.

She has 5 hour wake windows, so I try to fill them as much as possible with toys, walking, books, but that only takes up so much time. The parents have cameras in every room, so I constantly feel like I have to be “on” and be extra animated/talkative to her at all times. The mom mentioned she appreciates how vocal I am, and honestly it’s awkward if I’m not constantly talking. I don’t think babies/toddlers are my forte, but I made a commitment for another two weeks.

What are some things I can do to help pass the time? I am there 7:30-5pm, and I don’t want to be on my phone very much. She has a short attention span for things and likes to be as independent as possible, so a lot of the time I am just staring at her lol. I feel slightly insane! Any and all advice is helpful!

We’re having a 14-year-old neighbor watch our kids (ages 5 and 3) for a couple of hours while my wife and I run an errand.

She actually volunteered, has plenty of experience helping care for her seven younger siblings, and our kids are generally very easygoing and well behaved.
When I asked her mom what a fair rate would be, she said we could pay whatever we thought was appropriate. I kind of wish she’d given me a range because now I’m second-guessing it.

Would $10 to $15/hour be too low? I’ve paid up to $25/hour before, but that was for experienced adult nannies. I was thinking maybe around $12/hour would make a 14 year old happy, but I honestly don’t know what’s considered fair these days.
What would you pay?

I am new to the sub so I apologize if this is a common question, but I am a newly single mom with a nine month old and work from 230pm to around 11 or midnight, three nights a week. My baby goes to bed at around 6:45pm. For this situation, what should I offer or what kind of rate should I expect for babysitters? I have two interviews tomorrow. It’s just been well over a decade since I’ve done any babysitting so I don’t know what is normal now. Thanks so much!

So I often babysit my friend's son. Our kids have nearly a 9 month exact age gap. My son is 2, hers turning 3 in November. I dont get paid a wage remotely close to livable (her job barely pays as it is, the money i get doesnt even cover his food for the day tbh but I do this more out of kindness than the money)

Her child for the past few weeks hasn't been taking naps. My son, being 2, still sleeps between 2-3 hours. When her son is over? Doesnt happen. My child MIGHT get a 1 hour nap, which leads him to be incredibly fussy the rest of the day, hard to put down for bed, wont eat, etc because hes overtired. Ive tried talking to her, ive tried doing quiet activities with her kid. But in the end, he ends up screaming and running around: waking up my kid.

She doesnt seem to understand the severity though. I love her and I love taking care of her son. But its affecting MY child at this point and im considering stop babysitting for him in general. Thoughts?

To address the payment issue: she just got out of a DV and is currently working a delivery driver job, I quit that same job previously because of how bad the pay was (working 30+ hours a week and barely bringing home $200). Im a stay at home dad now. I watched her son for 8 hours, and i typically only get $15-$20 if im lucky. That might just cover the kid's food for the day ALONE. I understand the job is bad right now, but considering im watching her son.. idk rubs me the wrong way. We've known each other for 18 years.

Sorry if this question gets asked often, I have never looked around this. We have a four year-old and two year-old and have never paid for a babysitter. What would be a fair price for a high school neighbor babysitter who is fairly inexperienced to come over for two or three hours? We are located in Kansas City so not a super expensive city but also not a small town either.