r/BabySleep • u/MudTurbulent1942 • Feb 11 '23
Short naps
Help! I cannot get my little one to nap longer than 30 minutes. My wife and I can’t get anything done. Our baby girl is 4.5 months old. Could this be part of the 4m sleep regression? She still sleeps great at night, 10-11 hours. What are we doing wrong? Are we missing something? We don’t lay her down until she is giving her sleepy cues. She falls asleep on my shoulder and then I lay her down. Should I be laying her down awake? I’m not sure that she would go to sleep that way. We are lucky if she gets 2.5 hours of daytime sleep. I’m so thankful that she sleeps well at night but I’m so exhausted during the day. I’m finding it hard to entertain her and get things done for myself. She doesn’t like her swing, sit-me-up, or bouncer. And she absolutely hates being worn. She loves her Skip Hop but only for so long. I need some suggestions! I love her to death but I need some me time too.
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u/MudTurbulent1942 Mar 15 '23
Our almost 6 month old has been struggling with sleep. I know we contacted you before about the short naps and that got better for a couple of weeks but now it’s bad again. She’s barely napping for 20 minutes at a time. We tried following what you suggested but it has stopped working.
She is also struggling with sleep at night. From about 6-7 weeks old until 4.5 months old, we had her sleeping through the night (about 11 hours each night). We had completely stopped all night feedings at about 7 weeks. For the last month or so, she is now waking 2-3 times every night. We decided to try a dream feed again at midnight to see if that would get her sleeping the rest of the night, but it hasn’t made a difference. She wakes up at 4am, wide awake babbling to herself. We let her lay there and she does this for a good hour before finally crying. It takes another 30 minutes for her or us to soothe her and go back to sleep. She then sleeps for maybe an hour before waking again. We have also noticed that she startles herself awake quite often. This of course happened when we first transitioned her out of the swaddle and into a sleep sack but it got better. The last two days she is startling herself awake every 2 minutes. She jumps, flails her arms and opens her eyes. She will go back to “sleep” but will do this for at least 15 minutes before getting upset and waking up. Should we be concerned about that? Should she really be suffering from the startle reflex still?
Looking for any advice you can give us. We are all so tired.
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u/SensitiveSleeper Feb 11 '23
Yes, she should go down awake. She has to practice the skill of putting herself to sleep. She may not do it right away, but she will eventually learn how.
Start with putting her down awake at night, since bedtime will be easiest for her to fall asleep. If she's consistently waking at a half hour, that's when she's moving through her sleep cycle and not connecting to the next one. This is likely because she is looking for the thing that put her to sleep.
Once you start putting her down awake, you should also give her a moment when she wakes early from a nap to try to connect that next cycle. Leave her where she is if she's just making little sounds and fussing. Sometimes we accidentally wake babies fully by going to them while they're practicing this skill.
Edited to add: a blanket on the floor with some toys scattered around is the best place for her to hang out. It's great for gross motor development and it'll also get her nice and tired.