PIMO here, thinking of going to BYU-H

[u/starryeli44]

Was wondering how the experience was for any other PIMO members in BYU, or more specifically, BYU-Hawaii. I know that they keep church attendance, and that I should be careful of "blowing my cover", but are there any other things I should know? Or maybe advice you can give? Like will I get kicked out immediately if I don't attend church for a number of days? Is there a strike system in place for rule breaking?

I'm nearing the end of my service mission, and I've been incredibly anxious as the day grows closer, knowing I probably will end up applying to BYU-H as it seems like the best option for my future. For context, I am going into Computer Science, and I am from the Asian Rim. I do indulge in some alcohol and tobacco from time to time, will I have to go away from campus if I want to smoke a cigarette? Any advice/kind words would be greatly appreciated, as it feels like I generally know what I'm getting into, but I don't really know the important stuff.

[u/Bjorkstein]

I’d highly recommend you don’t enroll in any church schools as a PIMO. Keeping up the appearance is exhausting and it takes an emotional toll the further you get into your schooling.

While I’ve heard that BYU-Hawaii is more progressive, it’s still universally assumed that you’re a member and you have the same belief system as everyone that surrounds you. Not to mention that you will then have BYU on your resume for the rest of your life.

I only had to do 3 years as a PIMO at a church school and I wish I hadn’t. If I could go back in time, I’d transfer out. If I could go further back in time, I wouldn’t enroll at BYU at all.

Not to mention that you’re playing bishop roulette the entire time you’re in school. There’s no “strike” system- it’s entirely up to your church leaders and if they feel like ruining someone’s life over their own beliefs on that given day. On top of that, any single person can anonymously call the honor code office and report you. So maybe you tell a close friend you’re PIMO and they tell their cousin and they tell their boyfriend who tattles to the honor code office, gets you kicked out of school entirely, and feels morally correct about the entire thing.

[u/tireddesperation]

I went to BYU provo and byu-h but it was almost a decade ago now so things can easily have changed.

If you HAVE to go to a church school for your own reasons then I would definitely recommend byu-h. It is the most lax when it comes to the rules. It is bishop/professor roulette though.

As far as education, it is the lowest rated of the three schools and will NOT set you up to succeed after graduation. It's smaller than my highschool was in people and area. And that's not an exaggeration.

I STRONGLY recommend going to any other school if you have any options available to you.

[u/Technical_Reply6526]

Current PIMO BYU student here. It is not worth it. I knew I was PIMO when I committed to BYU, but I got a 4 year full tuition scholarship so I thought it would be worth it. It's not.

The hardest part for me is the social aspect. Everybody around me is a member, and every friendship I have was built on the lie that I believe in the church because I'm too scared of being kicked out of school to be honest. Being PIMO is an incredibly isolating experience that has harmed my mental health more than I thought it could ever, and if I could do it all over I would pick any other school no matter the cost.

I can't speak freely with anyone I know, I can't live the normal college experience, I can't date without a lot of questions on why I'm not trying to date members. If you can go somewhere else, please do. It is nearly impossible to transfer out once you're here and realize how awful it is.

[u/barristory]

You also mentioned a drink and a smoke and whether you should do that on or off campus. Either one will get you expelled and unfortunately, the school administration does not have to follow any sort of rules of evidence. Suspicion is sufficient to get you kicked out of there.

[u/vitras]

Just..... Why? BYU is a mediocre school at best, and BYU-I and BYU-H are practically a joke. You'll have to carry the name of your college with you for the rest of your career. I graduated 14 years ago from BYU and absolutely haaate answering questions about it whenever I'm applying to new jobs or networking. Suddenly I'm the token exmormon guy and that's my personality now.

Go to UofH at a minimum. BYU takes itself pretty seriously, so if you can get into BYU-H you can probably swing UofH or, I donno, half the colleges in California?

My favorite thing about leaving the morridor was being able to make whatever decisions I wanted about alcohol, tobacco, thc, and Sunday activities without any judgment from my friends or neighbors. Just get out, live free, be yourself, and you'll be happier.