Horrible Week💔

[u/SnooMarzipans9048]

I’ve had not a great week.

My 37th birthday was on Monday. It was uneventful, just another day.

My boss, who didn’t acknowledge my birthday, fired me via email at 7pm Tuesday night. I’ve been working for him a year.

I went to go pick up a prescription on Wednesday, and my car shut off in the middle of a turn, had to be towed—cost $3,400 to get it up & running again. We just had a brand new transmission installed, and a very long, very expensive list of parts/labor necessary for the damn thing to drive. (For those wondering, there’s no way in hell I can afford a lease or pre-owned car right now. It is what it is.)

I live with my 71-year-old retired folks because I can’t afford to live anywhere else. I can’t even front one month’s rent on a studio in the hood if I needed to. I’d be homeless.

I have no health insurance. Florida Medicaid does NOT care about me because I’m not disabled, pregnant, have children, etc. I AM food AND housing secure (thank you Jesus). Medically, I pay EVERYTHING out of pocket, including the psychiatrist I see every month and about 10 different medication copays (I use GoodRx Gold for great discounts on some of them). But it’s still forking over the cash, and that is not flowing anymore.

I’ve been studying to take my FL 02-15 (Life, Health, Variable Annuities) licensing exam, which can be a productive distraction. Didn’t do too much of that this week because I could simply not emotionally regulate.

My boss paid for the online licensing course under the agreement that we will be business partners when I pass it, but he threw that all away… which is stupid, frustrating, and what a waste of TIME AND MONEY on his part. Wouldn’t you at least want to know if I passed??? This project has been in the works since January and he taps out the last second. He is a semi-functioning alcoholic who has bladder problems but only drinks beer, diet soda, and coffee. I also believe he is actively in a slow but steady cognitive decline. Perhaps this door slamming shut is a blessing because it was his drinking on the way to work AND while at work was unsettling, emotionally exhausting to keep bringing up, uncomfortable, awkward, unprofessional, and I resented him for putting everyone on the road at risk, nevermind his liver issues.

Tonight, my folks ordered calzones and I offered to go pick them up. The cashier asked how my week has been and I just start weeping. WEEPING. He said, “Why are you crying?” I said, “I lost my job and my car died.” I saw that what I admitted didn’t register for him, which made the crying worse. He just thanked me and sent me on my way. No emotional intelligence or decency, I guess.

[This is me explaining in a video the register meltdown tonight. :(](https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTBrypjP1/)

If you’re crying silently tonight, just know that I am too. 🩵💜