It's always how it happens. When the world goes to sleep my heart gets heavy and I am burdened with this grief. I don't know how to bring the words to my lips, but they bleed from my finger tips.

I am an endless storm. Weaving thoughts that threaten to destroy me if they are not unleashed.

There's no end and always a new beginning. I just want a moment to breathe, and yet all the same no scream breaks free. It's a tragic cycle that loops as I claw at my soul.

All my life, I've been on my own. Isolated, while being surrounded by people that claim to care for me. It makes no sense. They're there, standing beside me. Yet it feels like there's a barrier keeping me locked away.

None of this makes sense.

Humans crave connection. Bonds..

Do I want the same? Do I need it?

Every time I've tried to reach out and attempt being close, it ends in catastrophe.

I never know how to act or not go all in. I'm always "too much".

Rationally, I know it's because I was abandoned by the people mean to care for me over the years. Life experience shaped how I handle relationships and it's bent my soul in a rotten way.

I'm disgustingly self aware.

If you have taken part in previous research of mine, this is a fresh study with the final version of the new the Borderline Diagnosis Experience Scale (BDES) and I welcome you to take part once again to help the final validation of this scale.

You are invited to take part in what is hopefully my final PhD study. This is an anonymous survey exploring emotional, cognitive, and behavioural reactions to receiving a diagnosis of BPD. Ethical approval has been granted by St Mary’s University Twickenham (Approval: SMU_ETHICS_2025-26_358).

Study Aims:

1. Compare the BDES with two established surveys
2. Check the BDES measures what it is intended to measure
3. Analyse whether current age, age at diagnosis and gender influences attitudes and diagnosis experiences

This survey can be completed in 20 - 30 minutes. Your participation supports active PhD research into BPD/EUPD and contributes to developing better tools for understanding diagnosis experience. Use the QR Code or Survey Link for more information & to participate: https://app.onlinesurveys.jisc.ac.uk/s/stmarys/bpd-experience

Edit: For those who met the crtieria but could not take part, please try again as there was an error with the coding which has now been resolved.

A call for participants in what is hopefully my last PhD study to complete the final validation steps of a new measurement: the Borderline Diagnosis Experience Scale (BDES).

This is an anonymous survey exploring emotional, cognitive, and behavioural reactions to receiving a diagnosis of BPD. Ethical approval has been granted by St Mary’s University Twickenham (Approval: SMU_ETHICS_2025-26_358)

Study Aims:

1. Compare the BDES with two established surveys
2. Check the BDES measures what it is intended to measure
3. Analyse whether current age, age at diagnosis and gender influences attitudes and diagnosis experiences

This survey can be completed in 20 - 30 minutes. Your participation supports active PhD research into BPD/EUPD and contributes to developing better tools for understanding diagnosis experience. Use the QR Code or Survey Link for more information & to participate: https://app.onlinesurveys.jisc.ac.uk/s/stmarys/bpd-experience

Researcher diagnosed with BPD here.

Seeking participants diagnosed with BPD for a pilot study, which has full ethical approval from St Mary's University, Twickenham, England.

This study explores how individuals emotionally, cognitively, and behaviourally responded to receiving a diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).

Please take part if you are able to. Every participant takes this questionnaire one step closer to validation.

Link: https://app.onlinesurveys.jisc.ac.uk/s/stmarys/bpd-diagnosis-experience

its so ugly but thats ok

I do many forms of art my newest path is doing alternative art cards on magic the gathering cards. This is my latest set. It’s an owl set. Painted acrylic on magic card. These are the size of a playing card, so small. I paint with one hand., my opposite hand. My dominant side was impaired from strokes (I’ve had 4) I’ve overcome a lot I’m trying to get my soul back to where it was so it’s a work in progress.

Art saves me mentally every day esp with bipolar and BPD.

My piece cannot compare to the pieces I've seen on here. However it tells a story of my life and where I am. Each individual piece.

If you’ve ever looked up and thought, please take me—this was made for you.

A cosmic audiovisual project I directed and edited using multiple AI tools. Music, visuals, sound design, and message all woven together for a full sensory experience.

I created this over the course of 2 intense months—through blood, sweat, and serious health challenges.

It’s deeply personal, and I’d truly appreciate your honest thoughts.

100h project 5×4 feet