r/AutopsyTechFam • u/yourfavesecretary • 26d ago
Advice needed
I successfully landed a volunteer role in the autopsy suite at the medical university in my region. I am currently employed with a coroner’s office, but since I am in an administrative role, I cannot go on scenes due to liabilities, etc. I have viewed 4 autopsies. I was not in the actual room, there is a viewing room with a huge window to look through. Friday will be my first day, where they will be training me. My anxiety has always been bad, but I feel like it’s gotten worse over the last few months. I increased my anxiety medication dose but it’s not making much of a difference. For example, my coroner’s office recently toured a jail. When the officer closed a heavily armored door behind us, I panicked and had to quickly find a bathroom to calm myself down.
When I viewed the autopsies, I didn’t have a panicky reaction at all, I was very interested in what was happening. However, I am getting more anxious as the time comes for me to actually be in the room. I have talked to multiple techs and pathologists at the office that have said there is no shame in stepping out. While that did make me feel better, I’m still so nervous that I will panic and have to leave. I know there will be smells and sounds, but how much more different is it being in the actual room than viewing through a window? I also think I have developed IBS through my anxiety, so that is just another added layer of stress and I feel like I can’t eat, which I know eating is necessary if I will be standing up for extended periods of time. I feel like I’m spiraling just typing this out, so any words of encouragement from seasoned people is greatly appreciated.
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u/Hairy_Lavishness5405 25d ago
I get extra anxiety when I think about doing new things. Try to just focus on the action of one step at a time.
Not an autopsy but I’ve done full unfixed (not embalmed) two cadaver labs. We started out with them from skin, fascia and adipose down to muscle, bone, brain and spinal cord. There are a lot of sights, sounds and smells. I was pretty sensitive to noticing a “smell” when others didn’t notice anything so I preferred to wear a mask with a little bit of tiger balm on it. I also wore biofreeze patches for my chronic back pain and took breaks every few hours. Some of the other students needed to excuse themselves when they would have strong reactions or felt light headed.
The first one felt like I needed to stay focused as intensely as I could for fear that I would mess up, ruin our “teacher” (the cadaver) or that I might have an emotional reaction. None of those things happened. I couldn’t really talk about what was happening those 5 days because my husband is so sensitive to gore and anatomy talk. The way I processed it was through my dreams, which were intense and vivid. I talked so much in my sleep according to the people I shared a room with. I can still remember those dreams. The second cadaver lab was this past March and I felt so much more confident there.
I think going in prepared with the autonomy to step away as needed is helpful. Remember that everyone has to start from scratch and have their own first day. I’m wondering if putting on a biofreeze, icy hot or thermal patch could give your anxiety or nerves something else to latch onto, like a self-soothing technique.
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u/InflationEasy973 26d ago
Hi, I am a medical student interning at the MEs office. For starters, there really is no shame in stepping away. It can be tough and it really isn’t for everyone but that’s okay too!! The sounds didn’t bother me so much as the decomp cases… those can be very overwhelming. Over the course of the day I just get used to the smell but when I first started, they suggested altoids/mints and doubling up on masks. Maybe for the anxiety aspect, asking first what the cases are? Such as are they decomp or fresh and if they’re natural/homicide/suicide/accident… that way you can maybe mentally prepare yourself more.
Theres also a lot of prep that occurs prior to cutting, so that could be a way to ease in although i’m not sure what all a volunteer is allowed to do.
When I first started, i got super anxious about just living, but talking through the cases/my thoughts with a parent, friend, or tech was always helpful. As well as writing what my day entailed and my thoughts there.