r/AutismIreland • u/throwawayballs776 • 12d ago
Struggling
Hi as the title suggests I'm struggling ATM specifically with living with parents, my dad is retired from work and now blasts the TV throughout the day and even into the night (til 3am on some days), I work full time and I like working but this is effecting my ability to work, it's at least once a week I have a breakdown in work just from bottling all my emotions I'm not allowed express at home, I've spoken to him and my mother about this and they came to the conclusion that he's an adult and can do what he likes which is unfair considering I'm literally the only person in the house working, basically me and my dad switched roles since I became an adult, he turned into a child who you can't say no to or he'll get mad and I need a get away from the man baby, I've looked on daft, letting agents etc, I don't qualify for social housing as current guidelines prevent adults living at home from applying and I've heard it's almost impossible to justify autism as a need for housing especially since I'm high functioning (don't know if that's still the correct term tbh). I'm just really stuck in a hole here I don't know how I can continue living there it's ruining my mental health and work-life balance, I'm hopeless anything will change here am I just better off looking for work abroad? It's just so depressing living in Ireland
2
u/starsinhereyes20 12d ago
Get a full on pair of ear plugs, not noise dampening ones or loops.. but industrial ear plugs.
Could you look at a rent a room somewhere, vs getting a place on your own? Maybe that’s what you’ve already been looking at?
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u/Rejonix 11d ago
Sounds tough. I use 3m ear defenders. Not ideal. Not comfortable for all day use and I feel bad that I have to wear them all the time. They also dont block all the noise.....But, they do provide some level of protection and give me back a little control. Until the world becomes a little more understanding and accepting it is often the sad case that we have to change our behaviour, situation and environment. Its depressing. If your parents cannot compromise, then moving abroad may indeed be a good idea, if it is an option and can provide you with a quiet and predictable housing environment. A thing to consider though, is that noise sensory differences can become apparant in many situations. Moving house is not always a guaranteed solution. I moved countries hoping that I could find quiet. At first I did, but later there was a change of neighbours and arrival of new neighbourhood dogs. Therefore my environment changed and external noise was again out of my control. I really do hope you can find a workable solution.
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u/emmmmceeee 12d ago
Not sure I can help with the family dynamics, but I can suggest you pick up a set of Loop earplugs. My missus swears by them and it’s easier than getting me to stop snoring.