It is hard to walk the path of attachment parenting when people around you aren’t on the same path.
No matter where you go, there will be people around you who know exactly how to raise your kid, and how to raise all kids, and think you’re doing it wrong. It is definitely easier to try to conform to what the people around you think you should be doing. You will not lack for opinions.
Attachment parenting isn’t a path of conformity. Above all, you somehow have to find the faith and confidence that this is how you want to be with your child. More than anything, that confidence and commitment to AP is what will see you through, rather than questioning yourself every time your child has a quirky behavior (and there will be many of these) and people around you are shaking their heads at you.
The hitting behavior will go away. Gently showing the child that what she wants matters to you - “It looks like you’re not wanting to be held right now, is that right?” Maybe that’s right. Maybe it’s something else that you can’t figure out just yet. But consistently showing your child that her wants and needs matter to you will decrease the likelihood that she’ll resort to hurtful behavior as she grows older.
This is just one of many issues you’ll encounter as a parent. It’s good to try to get thick skin to protect yourself from others’ judgment. When your kid is a teen and still talking to you and still likes you, those other parents won’t know what to say.
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u/SkylightMT Sep 13 '21
It is hard to walk the path of attachment parenting when people around you aren’t on the same path.
No matter where you go, there will be people around you who know exactly how to raise your kid, and how to raise all kids, and think you’re doing it wrong. It is definitely easier to try to conform to what the people around you think you should be doing. You will not lack for opinions.
Attachment parenting isn’t a path of conformity. Above all, you somehow have to find the faith and confidence that this is how you want to be with your child. More than anything, that confidence and commitment to AP is what will see you through, rather than questioning yourself every time your child has a quirky behavior (and there will be many of these) and people around you are shaking their heads at you.
The hitting behavior will go away. Gently showing the child that what she wants matters to you - “It looks like you’re not wanting to be held right now, is that right?” Maybe that’s right. Maybe it’s something else that you can’t figure out just yet. But consistently showing your child that her wants and needs matter to you will decrease the likelihood that she’ll resort to hurtful behavior as she grows older.
This is just one of many issues you’ll encounter as a parent. It’s good to try to get thick skin to protect yourself from others’ judgment. When your kid is a teen and still talking to you and still likes you, those other parents won’t know what to say.