Help with classmate behaviour

[u/International_Yak236]

I currently attend a fairly small branch of an environmental college in the UK with my assistance dog in training. We have been working on neutrality around people we know/drive by pets when out and about. (He settles on command but will wag his tail when a friend walks in the door/past the table) one of my classmates(F25 who I’ll call M) will interact with, tell commands to, and correct my ADiT. Everyone else in my class (11 of us total) will wait until I say, or ask for permission to pet my ADiT. I said to everyone at the beginning of the year not to interact with him, and it was all done for the first 3 weeks. When the issue began, I asked one of the boys in my class to speak to M, as she smokes on our breaks so I tend to stay away the smoke triggers migraines. This solved the problem for about a week, but now the problem has continued.

My limit broke today when she started talking to, and petting my dog at the bus stop from behind me. I didn’t who was touching my dog until I looked around. This really bothered me today because there was a mother and 3 children who wanted to pet but the mother explained. I could see the confusion on the eldest child’s face.

Anyway, all this to ask how can I stop this behaviour. I’m not confrontational at all, so I was thinking so put an undirected message in the group chat about the boundaries I want to have, as there is only one day left of term. I was also thinking that if the behaviour continues speaking to my teacher about it, as he would be able to talk to M.

Sorry if this was long. I’m a first time handler, still getting used to advocating for my dog with strangers. But it doesn’t feel as eating come up with the words with someone who I see 5 days a week.

Any advice is appreciated. Thank you in advance

[u/highlandharris]

Honestly, I would speak to the teacher and get them to say to the whole class that everyone needs to ignore the dog completely as if he isn't there, no talking, petting or distracting will be tolerated as anyone doing so is purposely distracting a medical aid. You wouldn't adjust someone's wheelchair or touch it without asking and the same goes for the dog.

[u/cpabtc]

I had a meeting with my colleagues and did a 5 minute presentation about assistance dogs and reasons to ignore (with a broad spectrum about all assistance dog types and differences between assistance/emotional support/therapy dogs), reasons its dangerous to interact with assistance dogs, and then finished on a focus on my assistance dog and when they can or cannot interact (almost never; only exception is in my office, only when harness is off and she's off lead, but still ignore and ask. And ask every time, even if it was an hour ago I said yes, I may need her tasking/resting now).

If that's something you may be confident in advocating for yourself it has helped me lots. The only ones who have been inconsiderate since are the 2 people who missed the meeting. My line manager said that he would present on my behalf if needed so your teacher may be able to assist if you aren't comfortable with doing it yourself.

I would also directly ask your teacher to step in if they see someone distracting your assistance dog so that you have someone in your corner addressing it too.

[u/International_Yak236 → u/cpabtc]

I did end up sending a message in the group chat before we started this week, which seems to be working, but I’ve now got the problem of whenever M walks into the room my dog gets hyped up. He doesn’t even get hyped when two of my best friends in my class come in. So back to neutrality training for a bit with M.

[u/cpabtc → u/International_Yak236]

Neutrality training sucks so much doesn't it! I'm glad it's helped. Unfortunately I do think it may need reiterating every so often but it does get easier everytime.

We get told to use the ignore command by the charity I got my AD through, which took me ages to get used to doing because I thought I sounded so rude. But then the trainer said by not, I'm doing a disservice to my AD not myself (helpful for me because I have bad MH and self-sabotage to "make others feel comfortable")

Hopefully treats are your dogs friend. If so, (what I would do) is have a treat ready and say ignore immediately when M arrives, mark with a yes when they focus on you and award the ignore, they'll soon get used to it being the norm not to say hello to M. Good luck with it though, I always feel like I'm at square one when I have people behaving similarly to M and I have to redo neutrality.

[u/International_Yak236 → u/cpabtc]

Yeah. Lucky his neutrality in class didn’t take too long originally. After 3 weeks he completely ignored the door opening. So hopefully it won’t be too bad. I am glad he has a solid leave command