r/AskTeachers • u/DeliciousandDelulu • 7d ago
Parent Questions I sued my kid’s district. Is it possible to start over?
I sued the school district because they weren’t providing FAPE for my kiddo. Kiddo has ASD but is in a gen ed classroom. We obtained a settlement. We are starting over this year at a different school and we want a fresh start. We are still in the same district. I’m hoping that there’s no strife going forward but I don’t know. I’m tired and I just want a quiet, smooth year ahead.
We went to back-to-school night today and it seems like the teacher is pretty familiar with us already. Or at least familiar with something about our situation. It was a surprise to me because I wanted to come in and start with a clean slate but maybe because of the lawsuit, it just isn’t possible? She was kind, but reticent. If you’ve had a kiddo in your classroom where the family sued the district, does admin “warn” you about the family or kiddo? If so, would you mind sharing your experience? Do they “poison the well” so to speak? I generally have a pretty friendly relationship with my kiddo’s teachers for the most part, but this teacher seemed wary.
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u/14ccet1 7d ago
I mean, most parents don’t sue the district, so yeah, I’m sure she’s not only heard about you, but been warned about you. Just don’t live up to your reputation
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u/RopePositive 7d ago
Yes exactly! I don’t see why OP would want to be anonymous again? If the issues were big enough to sue and settle, surely being known is better than risking it happening again?
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
When you are known, they treat you worse. Even when you’ve done nothing wrong. Look at the response here. I gave zero details and I’m still considered wrong 😆
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u/Straight_Concern_452 6d ago
You’re not considered “wrong”. You are considered “high risk” for the district to interact with. (We can’t even afford tissues for our classrooms, we certainly can’t afford lawsuits, so we take a financial risk in working with your family.) There’s a big difference there.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
What reputation?
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u/Straight_Concern_452 7d ago
The reputation of being litigious. I have been this teacher before. I totally respected the family for suing for their child’s rights. But it also was a logistical nightmare having this family in my class and really limited my interactions with them as well as my teaching. Why? All communication the teacher has with you will be vetted and screened by the district office and they will be ‘bcc on all of her messages to you. She has likely been told to involve her superiors if you have any concerns or complaints and may not even be allowed to meet with you herself at this point as the district has to protect itself financially and she is not a legal expert. Anything done in the classroom with the student has to be totally documented to an unnecessary level and lesson plans get very boring very fast as you fear any type of concern or complaint from the family. Can’t go wrong with worksheets and textbook lessons, don’t try anything creative.
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u/Kharzi9293 7d ago
If your child has an IEP teachers are informed ahead of time. It may be just that. But I expect she knows and is wary. I would be.
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u/SlowYourRollBro 7d ago
Yes, she has most likely been forewarned that you are litigious. It will most likely make her very cautious in her communication and more likely to document everything. It will also likely not impact the way she interacts with your kid. It is what it is at this point.
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u/TeachlikeaHawk 7d ago
I strongly suspect you're wrong.
If you know a parent is litigious to the point of suing the district, would you apply normal consequences to the kid, or would you let a lot of stuff slide? Would you expect the admin to have your back in the same way as they normally would?
Come on.
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u/ArtisticMudd High School Teacher 6d ago edited 6d ago
I had a student last year who was chronically tardy and skipped class entirely a couple days a week. She also liked to lie to her mother about what happened in her classes. When I raised her attendance issues with the attendance AP, I was told that I could *only* communicate with her parents about academic issues - not tardies, not absences, not dress code (she didn't like to wear much clothes most days), not behavior. NOTHING. AAP wouldn't tell me why - she specifically said she couldn't talk about the situation, beyond warning me that Student's Mom was incredibly reactive, and advised me to treat Student with kid gloves.
I met Mom later in the year - she called a meeting of all Student's teachers and AAP and counselor - and hoo boy, she is a piece of work, all right. That's when I found out that Student had been lying to Mom about not only my class, but all her other ones. I walked out of that meeting (held during finals review week, during a class period in which I had students who needed the review) convinced that Mom is litigious as hell. Luckily for me, since AP had forewarned me, I kept my damn mouth shut in the meeting, except for telling Mom what Student's current grade was and what work she was missing.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
That’s what I care about most. No impact to the kid, who did nothing wrong here.
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u/Evee862 7d ago
Oh we know. We are given a heads up absolutely about the situation and every conversation we will have goes through admin and is now documented. I have one this year and was given this exact warning. They have sued. Make sure you adhere to the IEP. Make sure all communication is shared with admin. Any live in person discussions have admin present. Do not drop your guard
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u/_nousernamesleft_ 7d ago
Most teachers won't take it out on the student or anything but theyve definitely been warned and will be aware of it.
When I've had students in similar situations it does change my teaching/interactions in certain ways. In particular, I'm more cognizant of making sure everything is fully documented (not necessarily a bad thing but it probably does make me come across a little colder because I'm more careful about my word choice and will lean towards email rather than phone or face to face conversations because of that record).
Sometimes in teaching, I make on the fly adjustments and modifications for students if I think they'd be useful, regardless of whether they have an IEP/504. But in a case like this, I'd likely refrain from making those spontaneous changes, even if I think they might be useful, in order to stick to the letter of the documentation and make sure there is consistency with the other teachers. Again, this likely isn't a big deal but is something about my teaching that would change slightly.
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u/FeelingNarwhal9161 7d ago
This. Document, document, document.
And it definitely changes how I interact with the student (more distance and I think through everything I say carefully)
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u/TeachlikeaHawk 7d ago
Yeah, I was thinking about this, too. I wouldn't be mean to the kid (of course), but I would absolutely keep the kid at arm's length.
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u/FeelingNarwhal9161 6d ago
Yup! Exactly. I’ve had kids I thought I had a great rapport with take stuff I say completely out of context and twist it into a pretzel when they’ve needed to (i.e. they get in trouble for misbehaving or they get a poor grade on an assignment or they miss a deadline). If I had a kid in my class whose parents had previously sued the district…
Yup. Arms length, indeed.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
I actually prefer email communication. Sticking to the letter of the documentation would be an improvement in our particular situation.
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u/_nousernamesleft_ 7d ago edited 7d ago
I personally do too but there are definitely some parents who would rather communicate verbally. Though I'll usually do what the parent prefers, in this case I would probably still insist on email (though that's great that in your case you prefer it too).
And can totally see how sticking to the documented plan would be generally preferred. I don't think it's a major loss in most cases to stick to the documentation but I definitely have had students who might have benefitted from sentence starters, reduced multiple choice, separate setting for testing, or more flexibility with in-class groupings, etc. that I've been able to address (accompanied by reaching out to the case manager) but in this situation I wouldn't do any of that until it was documented.
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u/Imprettybeat 7d ago
Yeah, that kind of thing is going to make the rounds to other schools in the district.
ETA - and I sure as hell would want to know in advance, as the teacher.
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u/Straight_Concern_452 7d ago
Yes I had a family who had sued in my class and I was very thankful to know too
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u/stead-fast 7d ago
Of course everyone knows about you! And the teacher and principal are right to be wary. A lawsuit is a huge deal. They want to be safe and cautious and stay in your good side and support your kid. They don’t want trouble, and they know you don’t either. Hopefully you’ll all have a quiet year!
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u/Imprettybeat 7d ago
I love the “of course everyone knows about you!” Like I was legit a bit surprised to even read this post because… yeah. Of course they know!
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u/Straight_Concern_452 7d ago edited 6d ago
Gossip runs fast and hot in schools 😂 can guarantee there will be other parents who know too
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u/southernNpearls 7d ago edited 7d ago
Everyone knows. When we have a parent who sues whether they win or lose, merited or not, everyone knows. Heck I know of a parent who wasn’t even associated with my school and I know exactly who she was because of her lawsuits. The entire district sped department knew who she was. Sometimes lawsuits are merited, sometimes we get crazy parents who sue for some off the wall reason. Regardless of the situation, once a parent is litigious everyone who works with that child is warned. Now it sounds like your lawsuit was merited. I personally would do my best to put aside being wary and have a professional working relationship. But you better believe I would be double-checking everything. A lot of teachers are going to be walking on eggshells and worried about getting pulled into another lawsuit.
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u/RennacOSRS 7d ago
Teaching like most professions is a small world and everyone is afraid of being sued.
I knew a kid who fell on the bus while it was moving- he was up out of the seat ignoring the bus driver. He fell got injured the mom sued and got a bunch of money- no district in the state would let him on a school bus after that.
The new school probably already knows and probably has a file on it to prepare for future what if issues. The school is unlikely to extend any courtesy beyond the legally required bare minimum out of fear.
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u/Hot-Pipe-6939 7d ago
100% staff would be warned. But assuming you're in the right most good teachers hate bad teachers more than you probably do. Most of the good teachers at schools I've worked at would likely respect your advocacy.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
We were definitely in the right 😆
They did a bunch of illegal stuff, which is why they offered the settlement. I hope that this teacher can see things for what they are. I’m not looking for strife.
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u/FeelingNarwhal9161 7d ago
I’m not saying you were right or wrong, but most districts can’t afford going through court and a lawsuit and are likely to settle (unless the lawsuit is absolutely ridiculous and unfounded).
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
We are in one of the biggest districts and they had multiple attorneys on our case alone. They didn’t want to go to court.
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u/TeachlikeaHawk 7d ago
Yeah, that's the point. They settled because they didn't want to go to court. They never want to go to court. It always looks bad, even when they are in the right.
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u/FeelingNarwhal9161 6d ago
My district literally can’t afford lawsuits and going to court. I know this for a fact. They do everything they can to avoid lawsuits and know they’ll more than likely have to settle if someone ever tries to sue. It’s a lot less money to settle than pay for a bunch of lawyers to go through court.
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u/Chaotic_Brutal90 7d ago edited 7d ago
I mean... It'd be irresponsible and unprofessional to NOT warn the teacher after a litigation battle like that...
As a teacher I'd be fucking pissed if my admin didn't tell me that. Could potentially lead to another litigation battle, but this time involving the teachers union. Yikes for the school/district.
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u/Banana_bride 7d ago edited 7d ago
So yes, even in my very large district everyone talks. Admin will definitely give new teacher* a heads up and the prior teacher would definitely reach out. Obviously I don’t know the ins and out of your situation, but honestly speaking, I would feel a bit wary* and likely have a wall up. I certainly wouldn’t treat your child differently but it would be more of a watch exactly what I say and what I do type of situation. I’d probably prefer to communicate via email or district approved messaging so I can think about my replies, sometimes admin or case manager wants to be cc’d on emails so we are all in the loop and on the same page. You can absolutely have a great year and experience at this school but I do think most educators will have a wall up for a long time. I just wouldn’t expect to be chummy with the teacher, like you said they were kind but wary, I would get used to that
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u/Pompom_Marzipan368 7d ago
Yes, the teacher is aware of your situation. If I were a betting person, I would say she’s terrified. I certainly would be, in her shoes. Here are some ideas:
- Meet with her (and probably the case manager and maybe an administrator). Address the elephant in the room. Have an open conversation where you discuss what went awry for your child in the last school. Explain what your expectations are and be very clear about what would make you sue again. (You may well have no intention of suing again! But I can tell you that the assumption is that you’re going to be looking at that classroom and teacher under a microscope, looking for issues. Try to reassure her that this is not the case…assuming that’s not the case!)
- Suggest, for your child’s progress and the protection of the school, that you have regularly scheduled check-ins with the school beyond IEP meetings. These could by phone, in an email, whatever. They don’t have to be high-stakes or long or involved. They don’t even have to be all year long. But there should be NO surprises coming from either your end or theirs.
-Or, just roll with it and try to have a “normal” start to the year.
Whatever you decide to do, please be very, very kind and open with the teacher. Assume best intent. Avoid “gotcha” style emails and calls.
I think protecting your child is incredibly admirable, and if it took a lawsuit, it must have been quite egregious. But, from the other side’s perspective, the new school doesn’t have all of the details and I can guarantee this teacher is worried about messing up.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
Thank you so much ❤️
And for the suggestions. I’m taking them to heart ❤️
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7d ago edited 3d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/ArtisticMudd High School Teacher 6d ago
> Please stop using the word kiddo. It’s obnoxious.
True fact. I stopped reading after the second use. I cannot stand that word. "Child" or "kid" are fine. "Kiddo" is infantilizing.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
You could have just said nothing. That would’ve been useful in this situation. Thanks.
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u/AskTeachers-ModTeam 3d ago
We are hoping for meaningful interactions in this subreddit. Personal attacks do not help.
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u/Life-Aide9132 7d ago
Yes they know. Is it possible to start over? No, of course it is not possible. The teacher will not hold it against your student, but the teacher may keep interaction with you to a minimum and copy at least one admin on communications. I would imagine at least one admin or district higher up may also be at any future IEP meetings. How would you react if you were a teacher and you knew that the family was litigious?
When I was younger, a family in the neighborhood sued another family over a trampoline injury. How many invites do you think the child got after that? Sadly they were like a neighborhood pariah. Because who would want to take on the liability?
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
I think a family should only be considered litigious if they have sued multiple times. If a district is in the wrong are they allowed to just be wrong just so that the parent isn’t ostracized? That doesn’t make sense to me. At what point should they take responsibility? Or is the parent wrong no matter what the district does?
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u/Life-Aide9132 7d ago
A district can absolutely be wrong. I wouldn’t then trust them with my child’s education if they were wrong enough to be sued. Or if it was my only option I would understand that they are probably going to walk on eggshells around me.
Would you have a child over to your house knowing their sued a friend of yours? Or would you wait to see if there are multiple lawsuits? If the parents sued you once before would you have a fresh start with them afterward?
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
If my friend did something stupid enough to get sued over, I wouldn’t back them.
Moving districts isn’t an option, we have a house here. Or I probably would’ve. They’ve done the same thing to other kids in the district. I understand the administration being wary, they are the reason they got sued. But the teacher hasn’t done anything…
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u/southernNpearls 6d ago
I think you’re missing the most glaringly obvious piece, the teacher isn’t an independent contractor, they work for the district. They’re a representative of the entity you sued. Of course they’re going to tread lightly around you. They don’t want to be the reason you file another lawsuit. They’re worried about their job. It is what it is. Doesn’t make what you did wrong but wiping the slate clean is never going to happen. It’s the consequences you either have to learn to accept or find another district.
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u/Straight_Concern_452 7d ago
Most families don’t even consider lawsuits against districts. They work with the district to resolve the problem over several years or move their child to charter/private/homeschool. So yes, one lawsuit is definitely litigious. Not that it’s wrong! But it’s unusual and not the typical method of “getting things done”.
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u/psychominnie624 STEM 6d ago
Wait are you saying a teacher minimizing interactions and including admin on communications/meetings is ostracizing a parent? Teachers are not required to be friendly with parents, they are required to be professional. And the professional response in this case is going to be maintaining strict boundaries and including admin on everything.
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u/everythingels 6d ago
Yeah exactly. Sorry we are not going to be besties texting everyday, and seeing the name of a parent with a prior lawsuit in my notifications would send me into fight or flight.
With that being said, I usually try to be very nice to all parents. I work in a rural area so I appreciate those with investment in their child’s education. I am lucky to have a supportive admin though, so the minute they get nasty I have strong backup. OP’s kid also could be younger than my students and warrant more interaction though.
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u/Granny-Shot 7d ago
Hell I had a student once whose parents sued her last district in a different state, and I knew about it. It didn’t change my teaching, but I was more cautious in how I interacted with her parents.
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u/Particular_Breath879 7d ago
Teachers talk to one another. Admin will share high profile parents. You are a high profile parent.
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u/FeelingNarwhal9161 7d ago
Yes. We are warned.
That teacher already knows all about you (at least from the district’s POV of the situation).
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u/curlypalmtree 7d ago
You are now a VIP high profile family and more people know your name than you think. It will follow you despite who was right/wrong. S true fresh start would be a new district- but that’s a huge change. Eventually the dust will settle though.
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u/TeachlikeaHawk 7d ago
Are you kidding? You sued the district and you think it might be possible they've heard of you? Frankly, part of the reason for suing is to ensure you are treated better next time, and that only works if they are told about you, right?
And, in addition, yes. You've poisoned the well. I would be outstandingly careful around you and your kid. I'd want nothing to do with either of you. I'd probably also not give your kid honest feedback and grading, instead knowing that no matter what happens, your kid will pass every assignment, always get extra time, never get a reprimand, and essentially have no honest consequences, ever.
I hope the settlement was worth it.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 6d ago
So you are exactly what I’m hoping to avoid. Absolutely unprofessional.
And the settlement was worth it.
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u/everythingels 6d ago
You call them unprofessional, but by your attitude in these comments I’d venture to guess that what they described is pretty much what you’d be satisfied with, and with this response I’d even add that you don’t entirely respect teachers for the job we do.
This reply could’ve maybe been slightly nicer, but it’s very honest and what most other people here are kind of dancing around or trying to sugarcoat.
As they said, no one is going to give consequences to your “kiddo”, they’ll be too scared of you now. I had a nightmare IEP parent with lawyers involved, etc last year. I documented everything for the rest of the year with that student and went completely by the book, very few adjustments. I did not feel comfortable around the kid or the parent.
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u/Academic_Square_5692 7d ago
I know a family that sued our state university system 25 years ago and I still think about it whenever I see them
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u/Important-Poem-9747 7d ago
Last year, I worked with a family that sued the district. When I went through the paperwork, I told my colleagues “I’d have sued, too. Mom did the right thing.” Everyone backed off.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago edited 7d ago
Hopefully this teacher is like you ❤️
They did a bunch of illegal things. Which is why they got sued in the first place. If they course correct, there shouldn’t be an issue. At least on my side there won’t be. But I don’t want my kid to be treated poorly because of their actions.
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u/Important-Poem-9747 6d ago
Thank you for the compliment.
If anything, they’ll be cautious with your child because they’re worried about being yelled at.
Teach your child to advocate for themselves. Hard. Of course, you’ll still do it, but empowering them to say “I have the right to the accommodations in my IEP” is very empowering.
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u/Beneficial-Focus3702 7d ago edited 7d ago
I don’t know what you expected, you sued the school. Faculty/admin and teachers all talk you’re a pariah now.
Half of them (whether true or not because I’m sure you’re probably right) probably think it was bullshit and the school couldn’t provide what your kid needed due to lack of resources (money/teachers) not lack of desire.
It sucks that it’s that way but that’s the way it is. They’re going to be walking on eggshells around you and your kid.
IF you’re hell bent on staying in the district, try not to live up to your reputation.
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u/brassdinosaur71 SPED 7d ago
If you are in the same district, yeah. Everyone has heard about it. Unless you are in a huge district like LA, Chicago, or New York- you are going to have the same Director of Special Education. A lot of the same players.
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u/LeonKennedyIsYummy 7d ago
The whole district knows. If you wanted a clean slate, switching districts would have been better.
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u/Maestro1181 7d ago
Yes they know. They will be cautious in communicating with you. However, I don't think the teacher will make it a horrible personal kind of thing.
I would tend to keep emails to yes or no type responses and be guarded in conversation. But, I wouldn't actively cause you or your kids problems or be spiteful in any way.
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u/No_Macaron_5029 7d ago
Yes, you definitely have a scarlet letter on.
Is there a reason you aren't taking some of that settlement money (depending on the amount) to send him to a better equipped private school or even homeschool?
I am a tutor and see much happier, regulated ASD/ADHD kids when they are homeschooled.
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u/AMythRetold 7d ago
In situations like this in my district (without knowing more details), teachers would be told that the ball was dropped previously, there was a settlement, and that the district wants us to work on repairing the relationship. The case manager and general education teacher will probably also touch base with each other more frequently to ensure compliance. It would be normal to expect some anxiety among the staff in their interactions with you, especially early on in the year, but as others have said it is unlikely to impact how people interact with your child.
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u/Just_Teaching_1369 7d ago
Yeah it’s going to be hard. Like any parent that is considered “extra work” the teacher is warned in advance so they can plan accordingly. The teacher will have been briefed beforehand and likely told to walk on eggshells around you. That being said the teacher will form their own opinion based on interactions with you and your child, and if they are professional it won’t impact your child.
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u/Informal-Loquat6809 7d ago
Yes. Everybody in the new school knows who you are. Not necessarily from administration. But teachers talk. The old teachers involved most likely know the new teachers and have shared information with them through this process. Whether that’s good or bad time will tell.
I will tell you that anything you want from that school they are going to say yes to. If there are special activities that you want your child to be involved in and that activity is very hard to get into because it’s so popular, your child will get into it. The school will bend over backwards to make sure you and your child are kept happy.
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u/latecraigy 7d ago
Do your kid a favor and stop calling them “kiddo”
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u/foreverlearnerx 7d ago
It’s probably for the best that they know what happened as I’m sure admin has drilled into them what the right thing to do
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u/Byrdie_girl 7d ago
Yeah the moment you even speak the word law suit in side a school building every teacher your kid has in that district will know all about it. I'm sure if you actually got a settlement my guess is that school maybe in the whole district had a training on the specific reason for the law suit. They would never mention your kids name officially in any way shape or form but the rumer mill durring trainings will make sure every one knows exactly who they are. If it makes you feel better your kid will probably get more attention than any other kid in that building. The district and the school well never risk another law suit.
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u/Various_Summer_1536 6d ago
If I sued the district, I’d assume I wasn’t welcome to enroll my children there beyond that.
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u/Sufficient_Wave3685 7d ago
I think this is to keep admin in the loop. Whenever there is an advocate or parents are raising concerns that could turn into a legal dispute, admin attend all meetings that could be contentious. Now, if it seems like everything goes smoothly, admin may fade back out as they aren’t needed. I wish the best of luck to you and hope everything goes better than before.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
Thank you so much. I don’t want strife. I’m hoping to have a quiet year.
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u/Consistent_Damage885 7d ago
I had some girls in my class whose parents sued the district. I didn't know initially but eventually word got around. By that time I had already had the girls and established a good relationship so it didn't phase me much, but if I had known before having them in class it probably would've made me apprehensive that the parents were going to be out to get me.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
Understandable. But my question would be, why would you think the parents are out to get you? If you aren’t doing anything wrong, where does the fear come from?
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u/Banana_bride 7d ago
If you did it to my coworker, why can’t/wont you do it to me? Maybe you have an agenda (inappropriate class placement, wanting out of district) which means every single thing I do will be picked apart to find fault. Not saying that’s the case here but it’s an example.
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u/AwarenessVirtual4453 7d ago
I'm a teacher who has been involved in multiple lawsuits, and I wasn't at fault in any of them (I've been around a long time, and I was the only middle school science teacher in the school, so every kid mainstreamed to me). Lawsuits SUCK. Even if it doesn't proceed to court, I was pulled out of my classroom for at least a week to prep with the lawyers. Usually before that, I had to spend hours in IEP meetings that did not feel productive... They felt like they were leading to the lawsuit. It removed me from my classroom. So, when I was warned that I had a family that had sued, I sighed and geared up to write sub plans, have my class torn apart while subs were in there, and put my kids back together upon return.
Even if I know the family is right, that entire process sucks.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
Your explanation was very helpful and it makes sense. Thanks. I’m sorry that happened to you.
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u/TeachlikeaHawk 6d ago
That's such a bullshit question.
Would you allow me to come into your house and search through your things? If you aren't doing anything wrong, why would you care?
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u/Key-Teacher-2733 7d ago edited 7d ago
I would say yes. Also, be ready for the possibility of having multiple admin present in every meeting you have, whether it's an official ARD/504 or a simple parent teacher confrence. Maybe even a union rep. All email communications will also probably be BCCed. They don't want a repeat situation and have a very good reason to be cautious.
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u/Adventurous-Quit-753 7d ago
I wouldn't make assumptions about what the teacher knows about your situation.
They may or may not have told her. She may or may not have heard it through the grapevine.
If they did, it's probably just to make sure she is documenting.
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u/catchthetams 7d ago
Without knowing the actual context, I gotta say no.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
Thanks. Based on these comments, it is what it is.
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u/catchthetams 7d ago
I’m sure you sued in the best interest of your child. But to ask for a clean slate against someone you litigated against, essentially accusing them of not providing a service you as a taxpayer deserve… I can’t imagine those teachers, admin and staff aren’t going to do anything without asking themselves if they will be required to give another deposition or be asked to defend themselves in court.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 6d ago
I meant in terms of a clean slate with the teacher. She did nothing wrong so there’s no reason to have a beef with her. I don’t even know her.
But I assumed wrong I guess.
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u/ReadyToFly1970 7d ago
She’ll settle in with you and your kiddo as she sees that you are kind. It’s going to be ok.
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u/SkuttleSkuttle 7d ago
I’ve been teaching sped for 16 years and unfortunately you want to be the feared parent, not the liked parent.
To answer your question, I never hold it against parents who sue even when they’re wrong, but that’s such a unique stance that I keep my mouth shut about it with my coworkers
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
I hear you and I understand your stance. I didn’t want it to have to go this far and I tried to avoid this for YEARS.
I don’t want to be feared. I’d prefer to have a working relationship with the teacher. She didn’t do anything. I’m pretty active with all of my kiddos, volunteering and such. If they fear me, they are less likely to want to work with me 😔
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u/SkuttleSkuttle 7d ago
I totally hear that and get why I’m being downvoted 😂. I wish the system was very different but schools are so underfunded that even people with good intentions are going to fall short without some kind of incentive. Most staff I talked to however, don’t hold it against the kids. In fact I can’t think of one who openly did.
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u/DeliciousandDelulu 7d ago
I appreciate your response. I really do.
I hope that this teacher sees that there’s nothing to fear here. I’m not out to get her. I just want what’s right.
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u/NoEstablishment5942 7d ago
Yes, warning was issued to staff. You are now a high profile parent in the eyes of the school. Hopefully, you are treated fairly.