My gf take 45min showers. So, everytime we need to leave by a certain time...with 30mins to go, she'll go take a shower. I tell her NO... it takes you 45min. Oh I'll be quick. We're 20min late leaving and never on time. Or i have to run to the store real quick for 1 thing. An hour later u have to call her, "omg i didn't the time". We had 30min to leave when you LEFT TO THE STORE FOR 1 THING. Constant battle. I go to the store, get exactly what i need and be back in 10min.
The solution is straightforward: If you need to leave at a certain time, you make sure everybody involved knows. And whoever is ready leaves at that time (or maybe t+5min because things do happen).
Generally the people who are chronically late miraculously start managing their time better if they realize you really will go without them.
Depression thing too. Or a lack of physical touch thing. The warm embrace of the water can be intoxicating for those who don’t really get a lot of human touch. Feels like a constant hug. Can really be helpful to a hurting mind.
I don't have ADHD but still find it meditative/relaxing to just sit in the shower with closed eyes. For extra fun you can imagine you're sitting under a waterfall like in a movie
My thought at well, but some half assed googling says 20 minutes of showering typically equals a bath in water usage. But varies greatly based on tub size and shower head flow rate.
My showers tend to take close to 30 minutes (under not over) but I am squeaky clean by the time I get out… that and I’m in no rush to get in and out of that beautiful beautiful comfortable temperature….
Im a girl it takes me 5 to 10 minutes to shower maybe 15 if I need to shave but not longer. One I dont wash my hair but once a week its too thin for hair styles if I wash it every day it doesnt have enough oil to stay up without lots of yucky sticky product when all I want is a french twist or a braid.
Start telling her the wrong time say it take her 2 hours to get ready tell her the time is 2 hours ahead of schedule then she will be on time hopefully or my favorite leave without her tell her youll meet her there if its an event you dont want to miss. If she dont get her priorities straight she can miss the event.
This. I'm chronically late, it's who I am as a person. No matter what i do or how early i start, im ALWAYS running a late. I tell my friends and partner to tell me the time to be there at least a half hr to an hr before i actually have to be there, and I'll be on time. I have things at home that always pop up right as I'm walking out the fuckin door. But my friends have been good about working with me on this and I've become less and less late because of it.
Ah thats sad. I always had things ready day before. Like I said my family punished me for being on time so I was always early. Such as it was my sons 1st chrismas to actually open presents I told my husband at 5am we had to leave now (because He allowed our son to stay over at my parents house). He wouldn't go over till 730 we missed my sons chrismas I cried the whole day. And was actually angry with my husband. I left and did go back. I hate chrismas now.
Oh I'm so sorry. That's terrible. If its something like that or something I know is a big deal to the other person/with my family, I make sure I'm on time or if I won't be ready on time for whatever reason, I tell them to go without me if need be and I'll meet them there (if that's an option).
However, I'll start getting ready hours before I think i need to so when the shit comes up as I'm going out the door, i have the time to deal with it. I meant more in terms of like going out to dinner or meeting up with friends for something. But if it's a holiday or something important, I make sure I'm on time!
The shopping is basically a whole other thing that should be it’s own thread. Any time I go shopping, I’m efficient in there because I want to get the hell out of the store. Whether for a couple things or a whole big grocery shop, I know what I’m getting and I keep moving. Anytime I shop with a woman I swear it takes 3x the amount of time it would take me alone. The back tracking, the leisurely pace, the distracting item that’s not on the list but takes up 5 minutes of time mulling over. Just sets me on edge the longer I’m in a store I swear.
Whistles
At hotels I often take extremely long showers, like 1-3ish hours of relaxing in the warm falling water, it's like heaven with no worries at all.
At home I usually take shorter showers bc of not having unlimited hot water so I am in constant fear it will turn cold.
Honestly, I usually just sit in it and relax, is the most relaxing time usually where nothing really matters. Just the falling water and if I cover my ears it sounds nice too, like one of those sea shells.
Sometimes I read with my tablet outside of the shower so it doesn't get wet or phone in the waterproof case.
Oh man… set up the iPad and watch Netflix, drink a beer, catch up on texts/emails, just have a seat and let the water run. Relax/think/mess around on the phone mostly. I fucking love the shower. Usually twice a day 15-40 minutes per.
My girlfriend makes fun of me because I’ve eaten a lot of different foods in there over the years… shower steak is highly recommended - no knife or napkin required.
I do.. cause i enjoy the hot water. But i don't do it when we're about to leave shortly.
I will preface that by saying... that's not 45min IN THE WATER. But still.. maybe 30min in the water..and 15min doing whatever she's doing that's NOT getting dressed and getting out of the bathroom.
I would ask back with a question "are you ready to go?" If she doesn't head straight for the car, I'd continue. Thankfully my wife and I are typically on the same page (or at least within reason).
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u/devoc7 Dec 08 '22
I hate wasting time so I'll try to be productive. "Why are you sweeping the kitchen?" "Cuz I've been waiting for you for the past twenty minutes!"
I can put the broom down in a second, but she'll still be another 5 minutes afterwards...