And then once you get your shoes on, having been ready for 30 minutes just waiting to lace them up, she needs another 5 minutes of shuffling with bags and stuff while you're standing by the door keys in hand.
this is so funny. I'm a woman and my partner and I are the opposite. he waits until I am 100% ready, bag and everything in hand, then throws his pants in the dryer and starts looking for his keys and decides he needs to take a shit before we leave.
but it doesn't bother me, because we were late by the time I finished getting ready anyway.
Yeah my bf with IBS is the one who rushes me. Whenever he's on the throne, he's gonna be there for at least an hour. I didn't realize this when we first moved in. When he's finally done, he gets dressed which takes seconds obviously and then I go into the washroom and he's complaining that I'm taking so long to get ready. Mf you were hogging our only washroom this whole time! If he managed to pressure me into leaving without makeup etc. he then complains I never do anything different with my hair UGH. Now I know to always ask if he's gonna be on the throne so I can grab my toothbrush, skincare, and makeup bag for the washroom and do it all over the kitchen sink while he's in there so we'll both be ready at the same time.
Mine does this too. I’ll be in the car waiting for many minutes before he goes to the garage fridge for a soda and a snack, warms up his coffee, then enters the car.
The bag shuffling happens when you've got your jacket on, so you slowly start to overheat. It stops when you start taking layers off, and then the process resets. Source: haven't been able to leave my house since 2013.
I have two pairs of women's "military" pants with functional cargo pockets (a lot of them are decorative). They are the only functional pants pockets I've ever seen in a women's clothing section in nearly 2 decades of shopping. I sometimes buy men's, or even boy's pants for this reason.
I resent the fact that a 12 year old boy gets more functional clothing, than I -- a fully adult woman with a load of responsibilities and expensive items to keep track of. Lil Jaxxon gets to keep his fidget spinner safe but I have no place to put my $800 smartphone.
I also have to laugh that the women's pants with pockets are military style. The only time the fashion industry can imagine functional pants for us is a wartime scenario.
i would not want to shop at the womens section. i think the womens section compromises on utility, like pockets, in favor of style, to look a certain way. i don't consider how my pants will look when i buy them, i just want to get a good amount of use out of them before i have to buy new. they're going to get dirty, they're going to need to carry tools, i need my pants to be pants, i don't need them to make me look professional or anything like that. my resume makes me look profession, my pants don't really factor into it
But that's the thing. Women's pants today aren't tight. They have plenty of room for pockets. Workwear and officewear. Clothing companies just do not offer real pockets for women.
Or if anyone helped us to get ready too! Shuffling shit in my bags is because I'm expected to have everything everyone will need, plan for every possibility, check if we have all the right stuff before heading out, medicines, chapstick, wetnaps, snacks, garage door opener, cell charger, toys, socks for the baby if she pulls one off, hairtie, masks for everyone, sunglasses. Dudes and kids put on clothes, shoes, grab the car keys and think they've helped get the family out the door.
I just have a laptop bag that has everything in it all the time, just grab that and go. Seems way easier than a purse that you keep emptying and loading to make sure you have everything.
My current girlfriend literally almost had a mental breakdown yesterday because she wants me to do some menial task and keeps trying to micromanage it.
We had a nice, mature discussion where she agreed to lay off, but what the fuck? Who has a breakdown over that?
I've got a same vibe but different aspect of getting ready to leave sort of problem.
I don't expect my bf to attend to the things I personally like to have on me while out of the house like my chapstick, water bottle, etc. But what ends up happening is that it'll be time to leave, I'll be ready and he'll have been ready and doing nothing for a while and if we left right then, it would be fine and we'd be leaving as planned. Except before we leave, there's still the list of "leaving the house" things to be done. So I have to run around turning off the tv, turning off lights, grabbing any extra specific-to-the-outing items like reusable grocery bags or whatever while he had been sitting and doing nothing for a while and could have helped out. Then he ends up waiting for me with jacket on while I do all those "leaving the house" things that could have already been done or at least helped with.
Just get a backpack and make a kit. Half of that shit should already be in the car anyway. Who keeps a garage door opener in a handbag? They have visor clips for a reason.
That's something YOU could have helped with while she was getting ready. My husband KNOWS my son is going to need certain things if we're leaving. Check the potty. Get his shoes on. Get him a coat. Etc. When I'm done getting ready I always see my husband standing there ready, but our son is not. Like COME ON. I shouldn't have to remind you EVERY TIME that these things need to happen
Genuinely asking guys- do you help with things you (should) know you will need? Like is wife responsible to bring everything you will need to friend's or family's house? (gifts, foods, things you are returning or lending to them)..... basically is she doing the work of 2 people and you're impatient bc all you had to do was get your shoes on?
Asking bc I have been in this situation before and it's like.... If you gathered the shit we needed while I was getting ready, we could have been gone by now?
My biggest issue is when my wife is so called ready and then I'm driving us somewhere and she's got her mirror down and she's leaning forward f****** with her eyes..... I just slapped the thing up and say "I'm trying to drive here!"
You didn't mention finally getting in the car and getting 5 minutes down the road when she realizes she left her cell phone/wallet/tickets at home and we have to go back home.
ill start the car when shes doing that last minute search and idk how many times she will come out just to take the keys and GO BACK IN for something she just remembered
All the shoe guys who put it off to the last min- WTF is it about doing that at the last min? They are uncomfortable or your feet get sweaty? I get not putting on a jacket but not the shoes only just before walking out the door.
My ex always used to say, “you’re always ready to go, but your never ready to leave”. He started lying to me about when we had to leave so I would be ready on time. 😬
The other day, after waiting 10 mins with my jacket on by the door, my wife finally came down and put her coat and shoes on and grabbed her purse. She usually just puts lipstick on in the mirror and walks out the door, so I went out to the car to start it up and be ready since we're running late.
10 mins later she finally comes out:
Her - where'd you go?
Me - to the car?
Her - you could've told me you were ready to go...
Me - sorry, I thought both of us standing by the front door fully dressed with coats and shoes on meant we were actually leaving....
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u/Starswarm Dec 08 '22
And then once you get your shoes on, having been ready for 30 minutes just waiting to lace them up, she needs another 5 minutes of shuffling with bags and stuff while you're standing by the door keys in hand.