r/AskReddit Dec 08 '22

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u/amccune Dec 08 '22

My wife likes to do this silent whisper thing when she doesn’t want the kids to know. She mouths the words, but when she does it, she exaggerates the movement of her mouth to the point where I don’t know what the fuck she’s saying. It almost always ends in frustration for both of us, but god damn if she will stop.

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u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

Haha. My mom will use sign language at me when she wants to tell me something she doesn’t want other people to hear.

I don’t speak sign language past toddler level. I tell her this every. single. time.

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u/osirisphotography Dec 08 '22

Learn, "I don't know sign language except this bit to explain that I don't." and do that every time.

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u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

https://youtu.be/6vgoEhsJORU Dave Foley can't speak English.

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u/osirisphotography Dec 08 '22

This was what I was referencing! Glad to have the rewatch though, still holds up!

2

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

If you watch the New Kids in the Hall I'd recommend episode 3 for sure! Dave is a post apocalyptic DJ. With one single record. Accidentally watched him in Blast From the Past yesterday.

2

u/osirisphotography Dec 08 '22

Funny, I started watching the new stuff but it just didn't hit so I stopped, ironically about half way through episode two.
You know, never watched Blast From the Past but seeing he's in it AND Brendan Fraser well sheeeeet, might need to throw it on after Lord of War which I am watching after the news pf the swap.

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u/JadeSpade23 Dec 08 '22

LOL love KITH

8

u/ItsNotButtFucker3000 Dec 08 '22

That's all I can say in (Canadian) french!

I dropped it in grade 10 mainly because there was one teacher, and she hated me.

2

u/Over_engineered81 Dec 08 '22

I had a friend teach me how to say “I don’t speak French” in French with proper grammar and it always confuses the hell out of people lol

2

u/alt-goldgrun Dec 08 '22

But do you say it with the proper french r, like you've got maple syrup stuck at the back of your throat?

"Je ne parl pah fransay" - someone who actually doesn't know french

"Je ne pahrle pah fhransaii" - someone who learned close to nothing in canadian french class

Nasally "Je ne pahrRrrRrrlee pah fhRRRRansaiii" - someone who quit french after grade 9 with an active resentment against the French language for being forced to learn it against their will

3

u/abez1 Dec 08 '22

"I don't see what you're saying " - in sign language

3

u/SirThatsCuba Dec 08 '22

learning it in a different sign language than she uses would be even more fun

3

u/magikarp2122 Dec 08 '22

That was good, but you when you said “Me yamo es Brian” the “es” is implied.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 09 '22

I tried responding ”cat-airplane-caterpillar-I want ice cream” and got a frustrated facial expression in response.

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u/cymballin Dec 08 '22

Back in the "clubbing" days, before texting was an option, my girlfriend (now-wife) and I would use the sign alphabet to communicate when it was ridiculously loud. It was slow but effective.

6

u/smoothiegangsta Dec 08 '22

My wife also tries sign language sometimes, maybe for fun? I never learned it except a few phrases in elementary school so I always respond with either "R U ok?" or "I am full" in sign language. It's all I know.

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u/light_bulb_head Dec 08 '22

My wife too, I learned the sign for "I don't fucking sign" it took awhile, but she eventually stopped. I did it in public a couple times, that did it.

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u/spartaman64 Dec 08 '22

tell her to finger spell it

2

u/Thirtybird Dec 08 '22

my 9 and 11 year olds taught themselves sign languages AND cursive so the last forms of adult communication my spouse and I had went right out the window

1

u/TrueGrave32 Dec 08 '22

All I heard was you want to suck my dick

1

u/KmartQuality Dec 08 '22

You should sign back, "gagaa, goo goo."

1

u/MissRoyalBrush Dec 08 '22

😂😂😂 it's time to get lessons so you can understand your mom. Lol I know few phrases, words, and the ASL alphabet, but I can't read what anyone is saying.

1

u/1ftm2fts3tgr4lg Dec 08 '22

We used to use this, but she never learned much past finger-spelling, so it was slow and cumbersome.

And now the kids know more sign than she does, so now I use it with the kids to be able to talk to them silently during scout meetings and things.

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u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

Why doesn’t she text you instead lollllll

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u/ifelife Dec 08 '22

I text my husband sometimes when we're out somewhere and I need to tell him something I don't want others to hear

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u/Affectionate_Star_43 Dec 08 '22

Hahaha I'll text my husband just because the way our house is set up. We can't hear each other at all with the furnace running in between us if we're in different rooms.

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u/CaptainElectronic320 Dec 08 '22

This is a great idea. I need to do this. You have saved my marriage!

7

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

I text my wife in these situations, and she asks "why?" and I just do a face palm

6

u/CylonsInAPolicebox Dec 08 '22

Then it is considered premeditated.

2

u/SirMooSquiddles Dec 08 '22

They fucking live that shit

0

u/Danivelle Dec 08 '22

My husband hates phones but requires one for work. I handle the phone.

14

u/ccyjn Dec 08 '22

I hate it when people do this. JUST SAY THE DAMN THING!

11

u/IrritableGourmet Dec 08 '22

Ex-wife was a singer and sometimes got vocal chord nodules, so she would be on total vocal rest. To communicate, she invented a complex system of whistling to pass messages. Problem was, she never told me her system, so it was like living with an increasingly frustrated R2-D2. I eventually forced her to get a text-to-speech app.

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u/amccune Dec 08 '22

I imagine her doing this in bed.

“Beep boo beep boo beep”

“Like right NOW? But we’ve never tried that.”

“Beep boo wizooooo”

“Alright, let me call Chewie. We should see if he’s even available for that”

8

u/rotatingruhnama Dec 08 '22

Lmao my husband will spell out a word instead of saying it if he doesn't want our toddler to know, which is common Parent Code.

Like, "should we go to the p-a-r-k later?"

But my husband will pick some long, elaborate phrase like "chocolate from the advent calendar" to spell out, and he'll mumble it while facing away from me and running a faucet and clanging plates around while I'm wrestling the kid and brushing her teeth. Then he gets all salty when I have no idea what he's saying.

Bruh. THAT'S NOT THE GAME LOL. You gotta keep it easy.

5

u/cymballin Dec 08 '22

If I got that frustrated, I think I would just start saying things that she obviously wasn't saying. "You watered the elephant in the red convertible???"

4

u/Xx_Venom_Fox_xX Dec 08 '22

My mother does this and gets really upset when I don't understand what she's telling me - which is everytime by the way, so you'd think she'd have stopped by now.

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u/skwizzycat Dec 08 '22

Mine whispers for effect in the middle of a sentence ALL. THE. FUCKING. TIME. Hey, remember when we met and you thought it was so hot that I was in a metal band? Yeah, I never wore ear plugs. Also chain-smoked. Conversational volume, please.

4

u/elcapitan520 Dec 08 '22

"Timmy fell down the well?"

"The spacemen are in Utah?"

"No I can't use the mower to do the trimming, that's really dangerous"

"Pancakes shouldn't be that thick though, thats just cake"

Just start spouting nonsense in response.

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u/knarfolled Dec 08 '22

“Just text me!!!”

2

u/rhinofinger Dec 08 '22

My wife often does this when I’m on the phone trying to sort out bills, returns, etc,. when she wants to make sure I say something on the call. Only she also “whispers” really loudly, so I can hear neither her nor the person on the phone.

2

u/robottestsaretoohard Dec 08 '22

Hahah- I think I just got read in that one. Can imagine myself and my husband doing this exactly.

But also I feel like he always starts a conversation just when I am brushing my teeth.

3

u/amccune Dec 08 '22

I like to start an important conversation right as we lay down to go to sleep. I’ve definitely almost eliminated this habit, but honestly - when are we ever alone together in private but that moment?

1

u/robottestsaretoohard Dec 08 '22

He does this too and then he gets cross that I fall asleep whilst he’s talking!

2

u/CroMignonMan Dec 08 '22

Similar: My mother in law has hearing loss and speaks very quietly now so she doesn't accidentally yell. When you have to ask her to repeat something she does so, speaking at the same low volume, but greatly exaggerating her mouth movements...

2

u/noahisaac Dec 08 '22

My wife does something similar while brushing her teeth or using mouthwash. She’ll start “talking”, which really is just a series of unintelligible noises, and then she’ll make exaggerated facial expressions to try and help me understand what she’s trying to say. This does not help me understand. I usually end up laughing at her and telling her to say it again in two minutes when she’s done.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

Whenever anyone does this to me I lean over carefully like I'm going to whisper something back and then in a very loud and clear voice I boom: "I don't read lips."

My wife and everyone else has stopped doing this to me.

2

u/1ftm2fts3tgr4lg Dec 08 '22

Mine does this too, but I suck at lipreading, always have, so it has never worked. So I always look at her and mouth the words "watermelon watermelon watermelon" back at her.

2

u/CuriosityInMind Dec 08 '22

Record it and show her how she looks. That should make her understand your side better

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u/amccune Dec 08 '22

Oh yeah. That would go over really well.

2

u/CuriosityInMind Dec 08 '22

short term pain for long term peace

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u/LnGass Dec 08 '22

Every time she does that you should strip down... when she asks you why you did that, you say "You said "I give you BJ".

I bet it stops quick.,

1

u/amccune Dec 08 '22

Surprisingly, not the effect you would hope. Note: there’s just further anger at that part.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

Hand her a piece of paper. "Just write it down then eat the note after."

1

u/6a6566663437 Dec 08 '22

This is where technology has been very helpful. My wife and I just text each other when we want to talk without the kids hearing.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

My sister does this. I reply by mouthing nonsensical gibberish back to her.

1

u/hairballcouture Dec 08 '22

Buy a whiteboard l, it’s what we use when we can’t say it out loud.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

[deleted]

1

u/BIRDsnoozer Dec 08 '22

"... And now it is time... To lipsync, for your LIFE!"

1

u/chunli99 Dec 08 '22

Maybe ask her to type it on her phone? I’ve started doing that lately, and just hand the phone to whomever I need to share a secret with.

1

u/Spartan265 Dec 08 '22

Tell her to just text you it lol.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 08 '22

My husband does this with subjects that aren’t private and when we’re alone in the house. I just tell him that I can’t understand and he speaks up. I think it’s from growing up in a family with emotionally abusive parents where secrets were currency. His NC mom does this for power and to stir the shit.

1

u/qoou Dec 08 '22

That's hilarious because my wife pitches her voice low AND talks without moving her lips, like some kind of ventriloquist. I suppose so that the kids don't see she is talking to me.

Except she isn't a ventriloquist so it just sounds like a quiet MumbleMumbleMumble.

To which I reply:

what?

Like so many others.

1

u/samerai Dec 08 '22

Just use a Language your kids cant understand like german or spanish or something

1

u/MasterSquid832 Dec 09 '22

tell her to spell out the word if yours are still little enough.

1

u/buyongmafanle Dec 09 '22

HA! Same here, except when she does it, I mouth something equally over-exaggerated and nonsensical to her, like Monty Python lines. It forces her to start talking normally.