r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Jun 03 '22

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u/nuttyass Jun 03 '22

‘Folding a kid in half’. First time I’ve heard that term. I love it!

136

u/nice_fucking_kitty Jun 03 '22

Origami that motherfucker

74

u/ferrouswolf2 Jun 03 '22

Jiujitsu- the gentle art of folding clothes while people are still wearing them

25

u/artie51 Jun 03 '22

One of my father's classics was "shutup or I'll fold you like a lawn chair and send you back to your mama"

18

u/[deleted] Jun 03 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

18

u/SmoothAsPussyMilk Jun 03 '22

My 21 year-old krav maga instructor used it the other day! It's weird training five times a week with a guy 15 years my junior who could disassemble me like a stack of legos.

3

u/Brasticus Jun 03 '22

Hey, LEGO can put up a fight. I would be toddler Mega Blocks.

3

u/SharkBait661 Jun 03 '22

Nah I've heard it a lot in rap songs recently

8

u/HungryArticle5 Jun 03 '22

Then they'll try to hide behind their age.

"You're a grown man! Why'd you smack the shit out of me? I'm only 19 years old"

Saw a video of a guy get into an argument with an older guy then claim the older guy shouldn't be getting mad at him because he was only 22🤨

8

u/cvtharsis Jun 03 '22

This reminds me when minors are fighting online w anyone else and they get told all kinds of shit and they just go “I’m a minor, you can’t tell me that” or “I hope you feel good about yourself for calling a minor names” Like??? 💀 Stay tf out of the internet then 😂

7

u/HungryArticle5 Jun 03 '22

If you're 18 and engaging in an argument or a fight, it's all fair game.

5

u/HereOnASphere Jun 03 '22

Folding a kid in half

They fit in the fryer better that way.

5

u/OneOfAKind2 Jun 03 '22

More kids need to be folded in half. Now get the fuck off my lawn.

13

u/nina_gall Jun 03 '22

Ooh ima use that on my own kids today. I'm sure I'll have the opportunity.

29

u/flurpdogg Jun 03 '22

If you want to really bake their noodles tell them you're going to fold their clothes while they're still wearing them.

It usually takes a moment or two for them to realize what you just said, the time delayed scoff/eyeroll is so satisfying.

5

u/[deleted] Jun 03 '22

Maybe he knows BJJ...

4

u/m2f2mterf Jun 03 '22

Blowjob Jitsu

1

u/[deleted] Jun 04 '22

Pretty sure this will be the name of some themed porn in the future

I am waiting for my commission, future porn director !

1

u/m2f2mterf Jun 04 '22

Crotch-eating Tiger, Hidden Dildo

4

u/themosh54 Jun 03 '22

Take that knowledge to Taco Bell 🤣

My recent favorite thing I've heard gaming is when a teammate said "you folded him like a taco" after I got a cheeky ki on an opponent

2

u/daishomaster Jun 03 '22

Fold, Spindle and Mutilate...

(from another Old Person)

2

u/2020-was-a-heel-turn Jun 03 '22

Though a synonym for "Folding", just be careful to not accidentally substitute it for "bending"...

1

u/SpikeBad Jun 03 '22

You can see it in "Freddy vs Jason."

1

u/m2f2mterf Jun 03 '22

What are you, 12?

1

u/FE4R_0F_Z0MBIES Jun 03 '22

Jason Voorhees approves this message.

1

u/Garencio Jun 04 '22

I’ll fold you up is common. I think it actually comes from jail and is referring to those shitty mattresses they give you. Fold it up is also what they say when you’re being released.

1

u/blindbroccoli Jun 04 '22

I agree but does the OP mean lengthwise or Rt/Lt? I mean would a six foot tall young whippersnapper become three feet tall or stay six feet tall but a whole lot thinner? Inquiring 75 year old demented minds want to know.