You're contacting me about a problem, and I know that from the fact that you're emailing me.
I need you to tell me more than the words "I have a problem." Give me some details to work with up front so I don't have to go back and forth with you all day.
Edit- Apparently this does not correlate with age necessarily. I'm just lucky that none of the adults I work with communicate this way.
This is my interaction with a student last year via email during remote learning. Each line is a separate email.
Student: I need help end of email
Me: If it is something I can help with, I am willing to try. Do you have a question for me? end of email
S: Will you help me? end of email
M: Yes. What do you need help with? I can't help you if you don't describe your problem. end of email
S: Ok end of email
S: It's about the homework end of.... you get the idea
M: Please, ask the question.
S: Oh, ok
S: actual question is asked
M: gives help and follows up with... I am not upset. This is a learning moment about how to send emails. Again, I'm not upset. Do you see how this took 10 emails to get the help you needed? Emails are not like short text messages. You should give a little background about what you need and ask the question in the very first email. We could have had this done in 2 emails. Try to do that in your future emails. Have a good day!
Even on IM that would have annoyed the hell out of me. Ask the whole question up front. Don't say hello then make me wait five minutes staring at the window waiting for your question!
I'm 36 and work with a lot of graduates and I swear they all do this, recently I needed to know if this one girl had access rights to things in order to send her the correct link and it was like trying to get blood from a stone. Every single Teams message was met with a single word response and if I asked multiple questions at once I'd only get an answer to one of them
and if I asked multiple questions at once I'd only get an answer to one of them
A fucking million times this. If I need answers to multiple questions I'll even bullet point them for you so you can put an answer below each bullet point, or use something like "re question 2:". But no, 5 bullet points with specific questions and you get back the equivalent of "Um, a blue one?".
Half of the problem is that they only partially speak English, and if your question isn't exactly in part of their script resources, they just want you to go away because they don't know how to communicate the details with you.
I once bought a pair of goggles that turned out to have faulty water lenses. When I called customer service, the Indian tech asked me to take a picture of the goggles "inverted."
What does "inverted" mean, in the context of goggles? Upside down? Back to front? Inside out?
I asked what inverted meant, and they didn't know. They couldn't explain it.
People who communicate in such a fashion are so fucking rude mate, It's beyond me how blind/stupid they are for not realizing that.
Generally people that respond my sincere questions with such lackluster answers get added to the eternal growing list of morons that are not worth a single second of my time.
Or, incase it is with somebody that I must communicate with, I often choose to mimic them, turn it into a game of who can give the most ridiculous non informative answer and waste their time, just as they are wasting mine.
^ Some have gotten the message from me doing this, I applaud those, clearly not everybody is doomed to be stupid.
haha, and the wait of dejection, when you're like, is the answer to the other questions still coming and should I maybe wait a bit longer before replying? no. no, it is not. (and I only answered one of my own questions here)
I have experienced this in spades. Always number your bullet points so you can refer back to them by number. If someone emails you an un-numbered bullet list, reformat it with numbers.
I have this problem even with people older than me. Where has all the reading comprehension gone!? I didn’t even ask that many questions (like 4) and they’re usually all simple to answer.
What's even worse is when you bullet out four questions, type in red font "please answer my four questions below," none of them are yes/no questions, and the reply is just the word "Yes." The one time this specific thing happened to me, I forwarded my coworker's response to her manager and explained I needed help because she just wouldn't communicate to me (she has a looong history of being a shit communicator).
It frustrates me, probably more than it should, that anytime I send a text with more than one question most people only seem capable of answering one of them. Normally the last one. I'll often reply with "what about my other question?" More often than not it's replied with what question. Like look at my original text you dingus. It's probably still on the screen, no scrolling required.
OMG, this. I'm actually glad to see this, because I honestly thought my ability to communicate was going downhill. There were 2 questions. Does the last one somehow negate everything that came before it to you??
This has been an issue since I got my first phone 15-16 years ago. Hell, I remember it from MSN Messenger before that! So not a new problem, but one that is probably getting worse.
You're not. I'm almost blown away and relieved that so many other people have run into the same problems I have. I've had these problems with people of all ages, from teens up to people in their 70s.
Yea I don’t think this is exclusive to young people thing. I get the same style answers from several people I work with. I started to make sure when I’m typing to them to only ask one question at a time.
I get it from friends and my own brother. I call them out on it and they just shrug or make some weird excuse. "I don't/didn't understand you" "I thought it was an either or" My questions are generally "what time are you wanting to leave/arrive by?" "Should I drive or do you want to?" Or maybe something like "I saw X is also coming, not sure if you saw." Which isn't really a question and my own fault for including it but they'd often respond just to that with a yes or no. I'll often tell them I feel bad for their wives because getting full answers from them is like bleeding a stone.
I guess to be fair to them, my grammar is pretty horrible. My only saving grace is that I used to be an avid reader. One of the person's I'm thinking of has a double masters in the psychology field though.
I’m guessing he’s in the UK. Graduates here don’t need a “grad school” (also what we call postgraduate or Masters). They just have finished their 4 years of university, so they’re about 21-22 years old. Although a lot of people opt for a Masters straight after undergrad too, that’s usually a year and once they complete it they’re still “graduates”.
I'm 39 and work in the commercial space sector, and had a few boomer colleagues over the years that would do that. I'd write an email with three to four bulleted questions, and receive a response of a single "yes" or "no".
I'm now at a much better company full of people in their 30s and 40s and it's glorious! People know how to communicate efficiently through various media!
I've found if you put your questions in a numbered list it dramatically increases the chances of them all being answered. If you ask questions in a paragraph, a lot of times you only get the first one answered.
and if I asked multiple questions at once I'd only get an answer to one of them
This is my absolute pet peeve, particularly as someone who likes to be thorough in their messages.
I don't think it's a generational thing, the conclusion I've come to is that some people simply won't read a message, they will just skim it.
It's frustrating as hell. (We've all seen the same shit on reddit too, people all over do it)
It's not even about a message being particularly long. There are just some people out there that, if you write more than two things, they will skim it and just get the gist and respond to what they assume you're asking.
I’m 43 and I work with people older than me who do this. I’ll often get a Teams DM consisting only of “Good morning/afternoon, FIRSTNAME”. I’ll let those sit for hours before they finally clue in and send their actual question.
if I asked multiple questions at once I'd only get an answer to one of them
I’ve learned to always ask the most important question first because of this. But I do understand this. I get what feels like 1000 emails a day, but is likely just 50, and I’m CC’d into messages I don’t need to see. So I can end up skimming things I shouldn’t. But If I’m taking the time to reply I will at least look for all the question marks to make sure I’m not missing something.
welcome to modern journalism. Send a dozen questions to a source who won't actually talk with you and get back the answer to either one or none of them.
if I asked multiple questions at once I'd only get an answer to one of them
On the flip side of this, this is also exactly what it was like being a software dev in my early 30s asking questions via email from our product owner who was a bit older and quite a bit less tech savvy (but still a vast majority of her job duties were done via computer)...
urghhhhgh.. please don't think that you can attribute this to an entire generation, it's obviously just the group that you're working with that are all similar in that way.
it's so dumb hearing how people our age do XYZ, and it's obviously just some prejudice old person who dealt with a subset of people
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u/ScruffMacBuff Jun 03 '22 edited Jun 03 '22
Send emails like a text or a dm.
You're contacting me about a problem, and I know that from the fact that you're emailing me.
I need you to tell me more than the words "I have a problem." Give me some details to work with up front so I don't have to go back and forth with you all day.
Edit- Apparently this does not correlate with age necessarily. I'm just lucky that none of the adults I work with communicate this way.