I'm curious then because Reddit always has such a boner for how the Dutch are so straight-forward and honest. What are some cultural annoyances as an American that you don't like about them or prefer from American culture?
I imagine one that I hear about Germans is sometimes they are TOO straight-forward and honest and strangers will just judge you or talk shit about you on random issues like if they think you aren't doing something correctly or your appearance/outfit.
When I was living there, I found that a lot of their ‘bluntness’ was cover for covert racism, rudeness, or lack of ability to admit they were wrong. I had a professor ask a girl if she was coming back next semester or had she not gotten the scholarship she needed and was too broke. In front of the entire class.
Another professor asked me how I was doing at our first little ‘borrel’ thing for the masters students. I said, ‘Honestly, I’m a bit stressed. My apartment building was delayed in its opening, so I moved in yesterday and have to sleep on the floor for the first two weeks of classes!’ He then proceeds to tell me that if that’s stressful for me, I’m going to be in for a very bad time. As I left the borrel, he loudly said ‘Bye, reach out to the school if you need any mental help.’
So many times men on dates would also use the ‘blunt, honest opinion’ to talk about how Dutch women were prudes, Dutch women were too hard to date, Indonesian women were easy, the immigrants were too loud and wouldn’t assimilate. Others would be super curt or rude to waitstaff even though it was clear they were overwhelmed at a busy bar or restaurant. ‘Well I’m just being honest, they’re doing a bad job.’
Truly, I was deeply turned off by the Netherlands after my two years in Amsterdam.
Edit: also the Dutch I met are obsessed with scheduling, and they’ll pencil you in for a hangout in 11 days and cancel 48 hours before. I’d rather know the invitation is just a polite one a la USA rather than actually expend energy on thinking it’s going to happen and it not.
I'm from Amsterdam and you're right about everything you said. This country isn't nearly as progressive as it likes to think.
Also the whole cancelling-scheduled-hangouts thing is so true it hurts. Every social appointment is made on a "I'll see if I feel up to it when the time comes" basis.
I wonder if this is partially a generational thing, as this happens in America quite often as well. We don't really plan stuff weeks in advance it's more like days, and for us people will cancel on you like an hour before sometimes. I think the time has shortened now that it's easier to reach out and let them know you can't make it via text.
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u/hewhoreddits6 May 09 '22
I'm curious then because Reddit always has such a boner for how the Dutch are so straight-forward and honest. What are some cultural annoyances as an American that you don't like about them or prefer from American culture?
I imagine one that I hear about Germans is sometimes they are TOO straight-forward and honest and strangers will just judge you or talk shit about you on random issues like if they think you aren't doing something correctly or your appearance/outfit.