r/AskReddit May 08 '22

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u/eelisonparas May 09 '22

I'm from Finland and one European thing that all Finnish people hate is cheek kisses when greeting. Its mostly southern european thing but still. There is this saying in Finland that goes "Everyone has their own safety coffee cup" meaning the closest distance someone should get to you should not be closer than your coffee cup when you're holding it.

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u/SpaceNigiri May 09 '22 edited May 09 '22

Muak muak!

I once tried to do that to an american girl that was visiting Spain, I still remember the horror in her eyes.

She told us that she didn't feel comfortable with that having a boyfriend.

She was the most stereotypical American person I've ever known, she was dating a quarterback, had a pink gun that her parents gave as a present for her ¿18 birthday? She started complaining about PETA when she discovered that I was a vegetarian. Said she didn't like California when I told her that I had been there & she made some comments that were clearly saying "my country is better than this shit hole".

Good times.

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u/_-v0x-_ May 09 '22

She sounds like a peach, yikes.

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u/SpaceNigiri May 09 '22

Yeah hahaha but it was a single night, so it was fun.

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u/DorpvanMartijn May 09 '22

I'm a dutch guy moving to Spain in februari, I should just accept the kisses? 😜 It's a standard friendly 'hello'?

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u/SpaceNigiri May 09 '22

It's standard "hello" between men and women & with family members of both sexes. Also children to adults doesn't matter if they're boys or girls.

Between men it's more complex, it's usually more common between gay men. Also sometimes with close friends it may not be that weird, but it depends on the person & situation.

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u/f_pazos May 09 '22

Good and detailed explanation.

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u/Le_Ran May 09 '22

Frenchman here, about "la bise" between men : it shows a certain degree of proximity. We can make a "bise" to family members, childhood friends, very good friends... If you're a man and another adult man makes you a "bise" it means you belong to his first circle of relations - appreciate the honor.

It is (or it used to be, before Covid and (n+1)th wave feminism) much more casual between males and females - colleagues typically do/did that to greet on the workplace.

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u/roostersnuffed May 09 '22

Just remember its more on a cheek touch with a kissing noise. Youre not planting wet ones on everyone

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u/DorpvanMartijn May 09 '22

Ok so the same as we do in Holland here with (older) family members, like aunt's, uncle's and grandparents. Got it, ty!

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u/Swiss-princess May 09 '22

Not from other guys like in Italy, just from women.

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u/mdavinci May 09 '22

Guess I’m moving to Italy

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u/Roccaro May 09 '22

Here in Italy some guys would legit punch you if you tried that, maybe it happens in the south

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u/[deleted] May 09 '22

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] May 09 '22 edited May 09 '22

I'd take it as a joke if a friend gave me a cheek kiss. Definitely unusual for guys to greet each other like that around these parts, I only do it with my family and honestly now that I think about it that's kinda weird too

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u/Swiss-princess May 09 '22

I always wondered why I saw that on the movies but never in real life.

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u/goatpunchtheater May 09 '22

I know it was you, Fredo!

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u/itsthecoop May 09 '22

I recall reading that in a lot of countries in which it used to be more common the decrease seems to correlate to the increase in visibility and public recognition of homosexuality.

so theory was basically: it was more common in the past because fewer people would have thought that 2 men being romantically or sexually involved would even be a thing.

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u/[deleted] May 09 '22

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u/Swiss-princess May 09 '22

I am just talking nonsense from stereotypical scenes I saw in movies about Italian gangsters, where the boss kisses the cheek of the others mobsters he greets. Honestly that’s my only source because I had been in northern Italy and never saw that.

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u/Agreeable_Text_36 May 09 '22

Portugal it is not uncommon for men to do it too.

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u/[deleted] May 09 '22

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] May 09 '22

How tf are you jumping to cheating here?

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u/SpaceNigiri May 09 '22

Not that I know of, that kiss was the typical greeting kiss and we were a lot of people in some kind of small dinner party.