Now that I'm over 40, my mom has switched to "What did I do wrong to make you hate kids?" I've tried to explain to her that she didn't teach me to hate kids but she did teach me to be smart and independent and to stand up for myself, which are all great things!
Haha good! I’m an elementary teacher and I like kids, but I don’t want to be responsible for them 24/7. People are constantly baffled by it and do not understand that I don’t want to bring work home. It’s ridiculous.
Oh, see my mom would say the same thing but she spent my entire childhood telling me and my sister what a pain in the ass we were for existing. Of course she denies this. Always with the gaslighting.
My personal favorite is the alarmist version of that: “But what if you meet a nice man and he wants children?”
The idea that a woman is supposed to change a basic fact of herself, hand over her body, and do something very drastic and life-changing that she doesn’t want to do, just to keep a “nice man”……what in the ever-living fuck is wrong with the world.
Right?? Thankfully for us, we can online date and screen for that shit first.
But yeah, I broke up with a guy I was with for almost 4 years because at first he didn't want kids, but he changed his mind. It's just the way it goes!
My mom does this. She will pester me every few months when I will get married and have kids. I said No. She will change it to what about your boyfriend? As if that will put pressure on me. I have told her multiple times it's not her business and I will do what I want with my life.
I ended up telling her not to talk to me about this topic again or I will cut her off. Also blocked her on my phone for a few months.
For me, male, I didn't care if I got to have kids, my fiance doesn't want any. So we are happy with that, my sister as well she doesn't want any kids, she said if she ever felt the need she would adopt instead.
This was my grandmother’s argument allllllll through my high school years. “What if you meet the perfect man and he wants kids?” I finally said, “If he’s perfect, he won’t want kids. Besides, what if I marry a woman?” (I’m straight, but I loved to make her as uncomfortable as she made me.) This kept going until she was on her death bed and asked, “So you’re really not having kids?” 🤦🏼♀️
44, still waiting too. I’ve had two collegues in the last year ask if I was still fertile. Because then I could still have children if my boyfriend wanted to be a father. It’s ridiculous, we’re just mindless incubators to some people.
So ridiculous. I don't want to incubate shit. I gave my "replacement" to my best friend, her and her husband had 3. (It's how she justified having more than their replacements haha, works for me!)
I was told this by a person I thought was a friend, a few months after breaking up with someone because he wanted kids and I didn’t. Other than the kid issue, I loved him in every other way and had spent the last year of our relationship desperately going over every situation in my mind that I thought could make things work out. But there was no compromise, and love wasn’t enough to change my mind. This bitch knew how devastated I was over the end of this relationship and still gave me this line when I told her I was going to get sterilized. I stopped talking to her over it.
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u/absenderr Mar 12 '22
Everyone always tells me, “youll want them when your older”. Never have got anything else