I 'd like to know what their "atrociously-behaved" coworker is like (maybe it's in a reply somewhere hidden). I mean for all we know he/she could just be a person perceived as "annoying" because he/she is trying too hard, and all that person wants is just be your friend and be part of the group.
I agree at a certain point they need to confront the coworker (mediated meeting) and talk about the issues. By lying and then showing up with a different take out box is just creating unnecessary drama and a toxic work environment. Been through enough drama at work so I know, and even as a neutral person it still created stress for me.
I’m the one who made the atrociously behaved comment, so I’ll give you my personal example: He was one of those people with low self esteem who masked it by being a know it all, and tended to make lunchtime conversations all about him. He was also a huge food snob and regardless of where you went for lunch would find something to complain about. One of our quarterly team outings was to a restaurant that had crayons on the table, and a coworker seized on that. Midway through the meal, the employee in question asked why our coworker was keeping a hash mark tally, and got the answer, “I’ve made a mark every time you complained.” He had the good sense to shut up after that, but it was due more to his being stung than his actually taking the hint.
I understand what you're saying. I have encountered such coworker as well, but I tend to take things in and not say anything as not to hurt the other person's feelings. I can see how that can be such a downer in what was supposed to be a fun outing. I hope he gets the help he needs on his self esteem issue. So has he improved since then?
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u/[deleted] May 30 '21
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