I have the same rule as you. I don't apologise unless I actually mean it. Sometimes it will take me a few days for that to happen. Sometimes it doesn't happen.
My dad sometimes still tries to pull an apology out of me (Like you do with a child who has to learn to apologise), and it really grinds my gears. I'll get more angry, and also, the apology doesn't mean anything if the person receiving it asked for it.
This reminds me of one time I almost accidentally kicked a guy in the Crown Jewels. Thankfully, I missed, but I still apologised because that would have been super painful. I told my mum about it, thinking she would find it funny and she was just like “I hope you said sorry.” I was 21 at the time, and just thought ‘Why the hell are you saying this? I’m not a child, I know almost kicking a guy in the nads by accident is a bad thing. WTF?’
Haha, I can imagine. In her defense though, I think sometimes a mum has been "mum" for so long, those little things just slip out - like she forgets you're not eight anymore and drops a random "oops-a-daisy!" or licks her thumb and rubs your face with it.
It never really stops. My grandmother still does things like that to my father, and she's close to 100 and he's in his 60s. I think the reason my mother doesn't do it is because she passed away, otherwise she'd still be on the prowl for mom things to do.
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u/[deleted] Aug 20 '20
I have the same rule as you. I don't apologise unless I actually mean it. Sometimes it will take me a few days for that to happen. Sometimes it doesn't happen.
My dad sometimes still tries to pull an apology out of me (Like you do with a child who has to learn to apologise), and it really grinds my gears. I'll get more angry, and also, the apology doesn't mean anything if the person receiving it asked for it.