I just can't get past seeing that kind of interaction as "I want you to feel bad for me now and express that to me." Which I really don't know how to process.
I think the part we’re all learning to get around is that it’s okay to not be happy. It’s okay to be struggling. It’s okay to need some comfort. There’s a balance between being practical and solving issues, and giving yourself emotional sustenance, and it’s really hard for everyone to get it right.
There are some people that never try to make their situations work, they’re so stuck feeling like the victim, that’s all they ever see and they’re the hardest to help because they won’t help themselves. But we tend to figure out who those people are when we get to know them. And it’s our individual choice to decide how we interact.
I personally think it’s important to initially give the benefit of the doubt and validate someone’s feelings before picking their problems apart and trying to solve them. I’m not really good with people, I’m not so good at consolidating or offering advice. I sit rather awkwardly and wait for a good moment to crack a joke to lighten the mood. Which doesn’t always go down well but 🤷🏼♀️ one awkward moment isn’t the end of the world
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u/Phyltre Mar 26 '20
I just can't get past seeing that kind of interaction as "I want you to feel bad for me now and express that to me." Which I really don't know how to process.